This one also works for "O They Will Know We Are Christians . . ."
Well, I'm certainly convinced: All Christians are psychotic fanatics who beat the Lord Jesus into their children by whipping them with belts. Good thing no one else in the world has ever abused a child, otherwise they might have to start a holy war.
What could people possibly believe they're getting out of watching Christian TV? Even if you're a Christian, you have to admit that it's boring as shit.
@2 I don't think he's saying that.

I'm an atheist and I beat my husband with a tire iron when he switches the channel from Real Housewives of Atlanta. There are Christians who say I do that because I don't have God. This story is proves that isn't true.
Well, at least he didn't feed the kids to a bear like his god is wont to do when children disrespect their elders.
Because if Christian bloggers were to post links to every story about LGBTs doing something awful, that would make some kind of point, or something.
@7 Yeah, those damn lesbians are always beating their children.
Hey!! My step dad used to use a belt and a piece of wooden fence on me when I was 10 and needed punishing.

And come to think of it, one time was because I lied about going to church ( I didn't but was supposed to)

Families are just GRAND!!
A day later, Ogbonna told police that he became angry after noticing that the TV was no longer on a Christian channel.
I can't help but wonder what channels he himself looks at when the kids aren't around. Is that why he got so upset at what they might find?
"malicious punishment of a child"? Are there still people who think brutally beating one's offspring is somehow not "abuse" or "assault"?
@7 the (obvious) difference is that Christians, as a group, preach how other people must live, and that hell awaits if those people don't live a certain way. And then they pull shit like this. There are certainly gays and lesbians beating their children, but they're not forming global, for-profit organizations that preach that people will go to hell if they beat their children.

In defense of the crazy Christian, he's just following the teachings of Proverbs 13:24:
Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.
What's that? The rules laid forth in the Bible are from an earlier and more ignorant time, and should not be blindly followed by modern, educated people?

What a concept.
I'm using this as an example when I teach my students irony . . . I know it's evil of me, but I'm still LOLing . . .
Aren't there gay and lesbian Christians? And aren't there Christians who don't, in fact, try to preach how other people must live, apart from things completely compatible with secular ethics like "do unto others" and "love thy neighbor"?

Asked another way: do you think most Christians would be cool with what this guy did? I think Andrew Sullivan is a Christian. Is he okay with this?
Bedtime story:

There's an invisible man -- living in the sky -- who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever 'til the end of time! But He loves you.
Imagine how little kids must feel! They think they've outwitted their parents, only to find that the parents discovered their misdeeds. And the parents have all these lousy rules! If you break them, you have to sit in the corner or something else bad. Then the parents tell you that all this is for your own good, because they love you and want you to live a happier life. What a terrifying, awful story.
I don't understand your point.

Nor, I suspect, do you.
You must be very limited .......I will pray for you
@20 Yes, don't do anything practical; just ask your invisible friend...
Christian or not I can fathom how a parent can inflict harm on their children. I mean I got spanked once by my mom (one open handed smack on the butt) for running out into a parking lot. But never did my parents beat me and I can't imagine them ever doing it. It makes me sick that parents out there think beating their kids is o.k.
@ 15, Proverbs 13:24: β€œHe that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.” Literal interpretations can't be ironic.

They certainly can be sad, damaging, and against the law, though.

Please wait...

Comments are closed.

Commenting on this item is available only to members of the site. You can sign in here or create an account here.

Add a comment

By posting this comment, you are agreeing to our Terms of Use.