Right on, Dan! Here's to a more sex positive culture! *lifts water bottle*
Candy's dandy but liquor's quicker!!
Dan, I think you meant absolve, not exonerate.

Absolution is about sins, Exonerate is about crimes.

Why do I see an new "Absolut" ad campaign coming on?
Somebody had to say it. But, if I remember that far back, man it was great to be young, away from home and with so many hot young things. But I worked so much I didn't have a lot of time to get drunk. Maybe that's the key- work hard and stay busy.
Keith Stone!
I got laid way less in college than I should have because I don't drink. (I don't have anything against drinking, but I just don't like doing it.)
I was quite promiscuous in college and wasn't a big drinker.
Yeah! More like High School.
Wait... people actually do that? I thought it was one of those things use for plot points on TV and movies.

And here I've been drinking just for the fun of it.
I am a 24-year-old Catholic school survivor, liberal as they come, feminist as fuck, self-aware and liberated, and I have never had sex while sober. Nor can I imagine that I ever will. THANKS, JESUS!
I should add that this culture of getting shitfaced, having sex and then "blaming" the drinking for the sex makes life harder for women who get drunk and then get raped. Besides a culture that says that its morally acceptable to feel-up/have sex with a woman who is black-out drunk (and hence whose state of consent is in quesiton) it also leads people to question rape claims if the victim was drunk. Victims may even question themselves in such situations.

Which isn't to say no one should get drunk and that blame for rape is on anyone at all but the rapist. I just think that a culture in which fewer young people felt the need to go overboard in order to get sexual would have the positive side-effect on breaking down one aspect of the culture of rape.
I think we should take away culturally-based sex shaming as an excuse, so that students can start using the next items on their endlessly renewable lists of excuses to binge. David Mitchell had a great phrase in the Guardian the other day: "like children and chocolate, students and alcohol: they don't know what's good for them, they can't predict when certain behaviour will make them feel sick."
@ 12 - "it also leads people to question rape claims if the victim was drunk"

They already do, so we can just imagine how ugly this is going to get.
Nothing new here; I observed this in college as well (lo these many years ago). And yes, what 12 said. It's all a giant mess.

Lynx: I agree with a lot of the points in your post (your last sentence in particular), but something rubs me the wrong way about how you've written this:

"Besides a culture that says that its morally acceptable to feel-up/have sex with a woman who is black-out drunk..."

The culture of taking advantage of someone who is blackout drunk, or rape, does not only allow for female victims. I'm not accusing you of believing that, but I felt like it was implied by your word choice.
Also, lower the drinking age so that the act of drinking itself isn't illicit and young people can drink in public, in bars, at tables, with food.
@17, we tried that once before. It didn't work.
My understanding is that alcohol raises the testosterone level in women, boosting their randiness. Something men have subconsciously known for generations.
@16, taking sexual advantage of someone incapable of giving their consent is sexual assault, regardless of the genders involved. I used a woman because rape disproportionately affects them and also because the study discusses the use by young women specifically but I absolutely believe that if a man is taken advantage of in an equivalent situation it's just as grave a crime.
Interestingly enough, my teenage years took place in the late 1990s (when abstinence-only sex education was gaining ground, but not nearly as bad as it became in the Bush years), and while I was a rigid, preachy straightedge when it came to drugs and alcohol, I was a dedicated hedonist when it came to sex!
This points out everything wrong with sex ed in this country but there is a simple solution: full effective sex education should be a mandatory class the first semester of college. Period. They are adults, they need to be informed of their adult responsibilities since they weren't as teenagers.
I drink because I like the taste.
@11: I hope you're not serious... that scared me.
Spread the gospel, Dan! My husband and I have raised our current college student daughter not to associate sex with shame. We've talked to her about good and bad reasons to have sex. We've discussed the language of shame used by both males and females to "keep girls in their place." She has a healthy attitude toward sex and no interest in getting shit-faced.
I got drunk in college because booze was cheap, and feeling drunk was great. No hangovers for the first couple years of drinking. And dancing was only fun when I didn't care what people thought I looked like. Never had drunk sex.

But then, I was an atheist. Unlike Christians, I had morals.
P.S. @16, blackout drunk guys are physically incapable of getting boners. Unless you're worried a chick is going to strap on a dildo and rape your ass, there's nothing to worry about.
@27 Not having had blackout sex, I can't speak from personal experience, but I don't see any definitive evidence backing up what you're saying. Plenty out there about whiskey dick, but to say that every black out drunk guy is physically incapable of getting an erection is a stretch.

It also seems clear to me that a man could be raped (or at least sexually assaulted) without an erection and without getting his ass raped. I'm not worried, but then again, that's not anywhere near the point of my post.

Feel free to prove me wrong on any of that.
@28 - exactly.

@27 - men can be raped by men. And as Thompson20 points out, women can molest a unconscious or barely conscious guy in a variety of ways. When you make fun of those male victims by saying "hey, don't worry, no chick is going to strap on a dildo and rape your ass" -- that's not hilarious to me.
"You can go out, get drunk, have sex and the next day say, 'I'm still a good girl.'"

If that doesn't wash the shame away, you can blame your equally drunk boyfriend a la Bristol Palin.
@ 29 - In the immortal words of Meat Loaf (sorry, I just like the absurdity of that phrase), you took the words right out of my mouth in your answer to 27.

But hey, everyone, why all the hate on getting shit-faced drunk? It's a great thing to do among friends (and I do mean "friends", not "would-be rapists pretending to be friendly") when you're young and the negative effects of alcohol on your body aren't that strong. I so miss those days...
@ 28 - In my experience, most 15 to 25 year old guys can get boners in any condition.
@32 Mmm... that's an image to wake up to :-)

Please wait...

Comments are closed.

Commenting on this item is available only to members of the site. You can sign in here or create an account here.

Add a comment

By posting this comment, you are agreeing to our Terms of Use.