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Any of the flirtation that has occurred since his promotion (and you have to figure that some of it has, as FIS does not appear to understand the definition of workplace sexual harrassment) opens the company up for a lawsuit.
And really--a shit employee, lazy, rude, careless, without work ethic, and ready to cheat on her long term boyfriend, how is this anyone's ideal?
NO. Do not pass go, do not collect your sex. As a supervisor you are the one who needs to curtail the flirting now. Even flirting can be construed as sexual harassment. And if you have to discipline her even more due to her shit work ethic and she get's all butt-hurt, you sir may be in a world of hurt as well with false charges. There are other girlies out there. Wank off to visions of this one but go find another fish.
I wouldn't want to date a guy who thinks I'm bad at my job. Just sayin'.
Sounds like a real catch.
She's stacked. And she's going to eat your lunch. When you go to your boss to get her reassigned, you're going to find out that she's sleeping with him already (how else is she still there?), and you'll get fired for making waves.
what an asshat.
Mate, you do not wanna root this slag. Yeah, she may be drooling for a bone like a drover's dog, but you've seen the shithouse job she does at work and you think she's up for rooting around behind her old man's back. There's more off with this chick than a bucket of prawns left out in the sun. Even if she bangs like a dunny door in a thunderstorm, it's not worth it.
I've never worked at a place that did not ban relationships between employees and their immediate supervisors. Surely your workplace also bans this. Surely your vixenly subordinate knows this, and has an ulterior motive for getting into your pants. She has a boyfriend already! Back off.
Get her reassigned to another supervisor if you can. If you can't, then at least stop with the flirtation and stop posting on her facebook. I find it very unlikely that she hasn't friended other coworkers, too, which could make you look like a sleaze who trades banging for promotions--EVEN IF you two never actually bang or she never actually gets promoted. You have got to understand that the office grapevine is already buzzing about you guys. And a chick who would lie that you sexually harassed her (seems like that's what she's gunning for, job security via lawsuit) is the type to lie that you fucked her even when you didn't. How many red flags do you need to see? Stay the fuck away!
If she asks (or pouts about) why you stopped talking to her, tell her that you have to distance yourself for professional reasons, then immediately make an excuse to leave. Don't give her a chance to change your mind. Don't spend any time alone with her.
Also, if you can't get rid of her, use her next performance review to scare the shit out of her. Couch it in corp-u-speak. But she needs to know that if she doesn't make some positive change, she's going to get shitcanned. Put her on a performance plan or what-have-you. Hopefully she'll be too busy working her ass off to keep her job (the economy etc) to flirt with you anymore.
Please be advised that no matter how stunning she looks that gravity and time comes for us all. In the long run it is content of character that expresses true beauty. In short mind your naughty bits and pay attention to how this "everything I want" girl treats others. There is someone else out there so find her. Just my $0.02, feel free to toss it in the dustbin.
Also, nobody talks about the Peter Principle anymore, but this 27-year-old middle manager has already been promoted to, or beyond, his level of incompetence. His upward-straining erection is no longer congruent with his career trajectory, unless he wises up.
Everything you want in a woman is going to include the attributes that make for a good employee. If she is lazy at work, she is going to be lazy in her personal life. If she is rude at work, she will be rude at home. She will probably be even ruder since most people can pull it together in public even if they can't at home.
She is guaranteed to bring all qualities you see at work into your relationship. It is good that you see all the barriers to your courtship because I think you are looking to have some sense talked into you. You can tell this would be a clusterfuck, but are having a hard time letting go of the fantasy. Let it go and don't screw up both your professional and personal lives at the same time.
And just to drive the point home: It's painfully obvious that her only redeeming quality is physical attraction. She's lazy, rude, inept, and scheming. Sure you want to fuck her, but you must know in your heart that you don't actually want a relationship with her.
Also, ditto #5.
And snarky over-analysis aside: Dude, don't pursue. Dan's advice is perfect. I don't think the difference between being the guy she cheats with and the guy who flirts and emotionally supports her as she breaks up and maybe provides the bed for her to move into is as big as you think it is. Do you love her enough to quit your job so she can keep hers and you can pursue a relationship?
expecting someone who is demonstrably incompetent and rude to behave in an adult and professional manner when it comes to the separation of personal and professional relationships with coworkers?
good luck with that!
She had been with the company for more than four years when I left, and had only stayed that long because they could not fire her. She had fucked just about every middle manager the place had, and some upper management (we had one female manager in a store with ten management positions, the rest of the stores in the city had none). She managed to snag most of them just before or right after they got promoted, so the rest of us got to deal with all the backlash for a good six months before they could do anything. It was to the point where they just transferred all the managers around when people started complaining about what she was getting away with, and she just stayed in the same position, getting raises once or twice a year.
Ask around. If this is your situation, go ahead and fuck her. I imagine everyone else has.
As soon as she gets fired, she will come back with the entire flirtation documented in writing, thanks to Facebook. Also, there will be an accusation that he tried to bone her and she refused.
She needs to be assigned to a new boss. Then HR needs to document the friendship and ask her if she felt harassed or ever asked him to stop. The second she signs a document that says it was no big deal, she can be fired.
It'll open up two jobs for people who work harder and don't think with their dicks.
There's no sexual harassment here. There's no reason to think she'd bother to make up a completely ludicrous sexual harassment claim which would fail and harm her future job prospects. It's. Not. An. Issue.
Also, notice they have "customers," so this sounds like a shit minimum wage job that no one's going to stay in for very long anyway. So does it even matter?
Please resign, you are incompetent both as a manager ( for the simple fact that she is not good at work) and a person ( your moral standards are, let us say, low and start thinking with your brain and not with your dick... ) flirt on FB... senators have resigned for much less.
OMG, i am judgemental this morning but i can't help it today
As for Megyn Fox, I wouldn't fuck her -- her face would bring to mind all kinds of images that would make me feel quite unaroused.
This will totally work out for your happiness in life!
What is it that turns humans into moths to roast on Facebook's flame? This guy has documented his fixation with his coworker/underling (who is flirting with being fired). She should nickname the guy "Geico" or "Suncorp" since he's her insurance provider.
LW, run, do not walk, to HR. Put it in polite terms, but fess up and beg for their help in saving your sorry ass. You're only 27 so they might take pity on you, but learn the phrase by heart: "Don't shit where you eat" which is simple enough that even if your brain is mounted in your genitalia, you should be able to understand it. (Really, reread your own letter about the conditions you expect to happen that will allow you to "have" her!)
It still stands that the workplace scenario - especially you being her boss and her being bad at her job - means that NOTHING SHOULD HAPPEN HERE - but I think assuming that we're dealing with a basket case and an imbecile is a little unfair.
"If it's not going to work now, leave it, it may work later." Is a dating rule that's worked out for me plenty of times in the past, and when it doesn't you often don't remember anyways.
::wipes tears from eyes::
Oh, I so needed to read a really stupid letter and this tickled my funny bone plenty.
Even if the company is a trainwreck of a number of shit jobs and equally shit employees, the LW is proving that his superiors hadn't done their homework before promoting him. To quote Bugs Bunny, "What a maroon!"
I want to do something stupid. Could you please tell me it's not stupid?