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Story at nine.
Also, I live in San Francisco, where an estimated 267,915 people are Asian (33.3% of the City's population), compared to 13% for California as a whole and 4.3% of the U.S. population. And 15.4% of the City is gay or lesbian, the highest percentage of the top 50 largest cities in the U.S. And so yes, I know a *lot* of gay Asians. There is a pervasive stereotype that gay Asians are bottoms, but I know a *ton* of gay tops.
And since another stereotype is that bottoms tend to move to SF, gay tops of all ethnicities, ages, and body shapes never seem to have much trouble getting laid.
But he is right. While there are white guys into Asian tops there is still a general perception that Asian gay guys are all bottoms. Living in a place with a very high Asian population I have had more than my share of fun with Asian guys in my single days and to my experience the majority of the Asian guys I have been with have been mostly versatile. But even some of those versatile ones I think were only willing to be versatile rather than wanted to be. When asked the question, "do you want to be on top or bottom" I always say "bottom" and on more than a few occasions the look of very pleasant surprise was evident.
And what has been mentioned by both Dan in the call and another poster here, is that size and build do have something to do with it. I'm not a particularly big guy, but I am not small either. I am pretty much average in size and build, but when I have been with a smaller built guy there was typically an assumption that I would want to top. A larger percentage of Asian guys tend to be smaller builds. I think that is why I like them. No matter the ethnicity I tend to go for smaller built guys. To me there is nothing hotter than a smaller built guy who is a total top. Give me Brandon Lee over any of the muscle bound guys out there any day.
It seems that many smaller built guys are not only assumed to be bottoms, but many just let themselves fall into that role despite what they want themselves because they think that it is the only way they are going to get laid. But really, it is worth the extra effort to find someone who is more comparable with you in bed. If you really don't want to bottom then don't. Work harder to find the guys who fit with you even if it means getting laid a little less, because hot sex less frequently is better than mediocre sex more frequently. And maybe one of them will become more than just a one time fling and you can get hot sex with a compatible person as frequently as the two of you like.
Oh, and another race based myth, that all Asian guys have small dicks. Not true either.
1.God: The Failed Hypothesis: How Science Shows That God Does Not Exist, Victor Stenger (physicist)
2.Why We Believe in God(s): A Concise Guide to the Science of Faith, Andy Thompson (psychiatrist)
3.Religion Explained, Pascal Boyer (cognitive anthropologist)
Get it through your fucking head, racism implies HATE, where many stereotypes do not.
So when I see, as this example portrayed, an Asian dude, who I assume is a bottom because it's such a common stereotype, I'm doing just that, stereotyping! It's not very open-minded, it's generalizing and judging all by a few, but that's besides the point, the point here is, it has not one fucking thing to do with racism, which by definition is hate for no reason other than a person's appearance. So please just shut the fuck up already!!!!!!!!!!
Versatiles, we need to demand our rights now! Then surrender them. Then demand them back at a later date! And so forth.
Who do we talk to about getting a V" into LGBT...?
Loves A Good Portmanteau
Truthfully though, I have worked many blue collar, rough neck sort off jobs, and more than once when anti-gay crap spewed forth from a co-worker, the "But that way there is more for us!" answer actually made these lunkheads think. (At least it LOOKED like they were thinking. Maybe it was just confusion).
By the way - Though I am a Hebraic sort, I nominate Dan (in all seriousness) to be made a Saint. This is the only site where I laugh and cry in equal measures. You are a Mencsh Dan! Truly one of the (not so) Hidden Saints. Mazel Tov - Asa
Oh never mind. I'm so confused over the concept that if your kink is Asian bottoms, it racist to indulge the idea in your head. So my "kink" is older men (50s and up), usually white (except for the smoking hot black guy in the insurance commercial on TV. Daddy!), and *tres* butch (the guy in the AARP commercial comes to mind. "I have a number for you, 50 million." he says as I lick my television). Did I step on anyone's toes here? God, this stuff is hard to navigate.
The problem is when people assume that all gay Asian guys in real life are actually bottoms, and not respecting or accepting their stated preference when a gay Asian guy says he is a top.
The problem in the original call to Dan was that the Asian guy is a top, and states he is a top up front, but when he meets up with guys who he has told ahead of time that he is a top they just assume that he will be the bottom anyway because he is Asian. That's what is wrong.
There are plenty of bottoms of all stripes out there, and if someone is into Asian bottoms then they should go find a willing Asian bottom to play with. But assuming that a guy is automatically a bottom just because he is Asian is nothing but stereotyping and wrong. If you are into bottoms then ask to make sure that the guy you are interested in is a bottom and don't assume he is just because of his ethnicity, size, build, or other irrelevant characteristic.
Gene Cayjeon, a Filipino American director said, "Mainstream America, for the most part, gets uncomfortable with seeing an Asian man portrayed in a sexual light."
@ lowpex, I've actually noticed the opposite. My (asian) partner's family asked me what was wrong with the word oriental, and why white people are all weird about that word. The older ones use it to refer to themselves. it's only social science majors at university, and young people in multicultural cities that get upset at the term (me included).