Great piece, but instead of getting to the heart of the issue, like Wayne Self does here, aren't we all supposed to be running around frantically worrying and debating each other about what those bad, bad mayors said, like so many progressives spent most of their time getting sidetracked doing the last few days?

I mean, sure you could go around pointing out that the real issue is Cathy donating to groups that-- far beyond just opposing same-sex marriage-- are helping push things like Uganda's "Kill the Gays" bill, but it's much more fun to form a circular firing squad and spend all our time navel-gazing over hyperbolic statements by our allies.

It's just a lot of people's civil rights (and in places like Uganda, their actual lives). So what? Let's all spend some more time hypothesizing on whether or not a Boston mayor should say mean things to a corporate fast food chain, and meanwhile forget about publicizing the specifics about exactly where these hate groups are spending their money and why the people funding them need to be publicly and forcefully called on it.

I agree, @1, the flames seem to get fanned the hardest from within. It's a distraction.

Dan: this was a great essay, thanks for posting it. I can't tell you how..*weary* I am of talking about a mediocre chicken sammich. Mr. Self covers most of the points I've been trying to make, I was scrabbling for a similar sentiment a week ago. He's eloquent. Gonna look up more of his writing.

Hey, if any of you are stuck in a dentist's waiting room or otherwise similarly boring situation you can see the depressingly circular discussion on my FB:

http://www.facebook.com/eva.hopkins.18/p…

It's all about the $'s spent and where. But we have all of high-tech, a great deal of other corporations, industries and who knows who else spending $'s to support equality, too.
So I guess they can have their xtian chikin and rub GLBT's nose in it.
As for @1- we may be a circular firing squad, but I suspect the hatred and rhetoric spewed by the chikin lovers speaks for itself, too.
I'm still waiting to see when we're going to start defending ourselves from the violence the bigots are cranking up to. Which side will fire the first shot in the Great Culture War in the US- xtians or us? This will end in blood-shed at this rate. Still being vilified for being who we are.

@3 um isn't it clear which side fired the "first shot in the Great Culture War"?

"All your life, you’re told to stand up to bullies, but when WE do it, we’re told WE are the ones being intolerant? Well, okay. Yes. I refuse to tolerate getting my ass kicked. “Guilty as charged.”"

As for blood-shed, haven't you noticed the "xtians" are loosing that's why they are becoming frantic and well whinny. The best answer and preventive to bloodshed can be summed up simply, come out, we are their sons, and daughters, their family, friends and neighbors.

Mr. Cathy cried out because he knows he is loosing.

@4 The movement to "end the gays" has really peaked. The last beacon of hope these people have is a chicken sandwich. Their entire movement to deny people money based on genitalia can be summed up with a piece of chicken, I can only feel sorry for people caring enough to support him.

Unfortunately, it seems as if this whole Chick-fil-A controversy has only served to give them lots of free publicity for their slimey chicken sandwiches, as the message of what the Cathys' support has gotten lost in all the noise.

Very nice essay, I'm glad to have read it.

The bigots have lost the war, so Self is completely right that supporters of marriage equality have to keep fighting -- even if they're misunderstood and criticized by their own side.

The fight against hate and ignorance will never be over. But battles are being won every day.

@1, I personally am still laughing over Menino's panic over those Aqua Teen Hunger Force Lite Brites a few years back. I've been part of the CFA boycott for four years now, and I appreciate that Menino wants to support us, but I also kinda want to ask him to stop helping us.

Tolerate my intolerance!

Christian conservatives really believe they're the ones being persecuted - the Bible tells them they will be. If they were forced to read this essay & answer a quiz on it they'd fail.

So yesterday thousands of bigots flocked to CFA to express their hatred of gay people.

The way I see it they did us a favor. They are expressing their first amendment rights, so good for them. They are also identifying themselves to us. It's not always easy to spot the bigots. When they do something to make it clear who they are we should thank them.

Thanks to yesterdays chicken gorge fest I was able to instantly identify several people from their facebook status that I now know I want to eliminate from my life.

And on top of that they are doing this all by eating crap food that is going to put them one step closer to the grave.

Really, yesterday's little first amendment action by the bigots is a win / win situation.

I have to laugh.

Chick-fil-A - the Vietnam of gay marriage. The Teabaggers and the Twinks are *much* too powerful to go at each other directly so they've gathered forces to do battle at - a chicken sandwich vendor

.

@14
If Chick-Fil-A is the Vietnam of gay marriage, it may have seriously lost the war; today Andrew Sullivan is reporting that Vietnam is giving consideration to *legalizing* same-sex marriage: http://andrewsullivan.thedailybeast.com/…

And they will know we are Christians by the way we gorge ourselves on fast food.

The struggle for marriage equality is but one theater of the greater war waged by religious absolutists who sneer at the idea of secularism. The day this country recognizes same-sex couples as equal to opposite-sex couples is the day we become ever slightly more just; but make no mistake, the forces of religion-addled intolerance will be far from defeated. They still want to ban abortion, shove God into schools and textbooks, stymie scientific research, and generally halt any progress that offends the sensibilities of their Bronze Age dictator.

@13: ha! i got a FB friend request from some half-remembered woman from high school, said yes, and her 1st post after was a rant defending Chick Fillet. instant unfriend.

In the midst of all this we mustn't forget the real reason for yesterday's shenanigans: Mike fucking Huckabee making yet another grab for cheap political points.

Yeah, the email from, OneMillionMoms today was um, charming"

"Let's continue to pray for Dan Cathy, president and COO of Chick-fil-A, and his family as they are still under pressure from bullying. Yesterday brought out crowds that supported the Cathy family with true appreciation for what Chick-fil-A stands for and not caving in to political correctness."

Yep, bullying. To be politically correct. Uh huh.

In the outer world, this has been cast as a free-speech issue, not a discrimination issue. In other words, haters can now mask their hatred as devotion to the Bill of Rights.

Funny, that's what they did do when I was beat up at my grade school.

Dear Chick-Fil-A supporters: Is gluttony a sin?

And here I thought that "Chick-fil-A donates to conservative groups" meant "Chick-fil-A donates to conservative groups that lobby for financial policies favorable to its business and some of these groups also happen to oppose gay rights." Nope. Looks like they just donate to groups whose purpose is to oppose gay rights.

At this point CFA wants to step away from the fray and say they will leave this up to lawmakers. After they have spend millions of dollars and ruined millions of lives. You don't get to excuse yourself from the consequences of your actions.

If you start a boulder rolling down a hill, you're responsible for the damage it causes, even though you're no longer actively pushing it.

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/07/11/us/epi…

Maybe you shouldn't 'unfriend' the bigots, since change usually comes by one to one dialogue, not even by well written essays, and certainly not by name calling.

The supporters of gay rights (an organized group called the Chicago Consultation) not only drafted legislation for the convention and created educational materials for the delegates -- they traveled to Africa to begin a dialogue with the priests and bishops of Africa. It made a difference.

Tactically speaking, the CFA boycott was a disaster. The trendlines all point in the direction of greater LGBT acceptance across all segments of US society, even the most retrograde ones. Why mess with that? It's just stupid. The backlash has put more money in CfA's coffers than the boycott took out, the mayors' hotheaded unconstitutional statements made the whole thing look like government encroachment on free speech, and meme images painting *everyone* who eats at CfA as homophobic bigots has created a lot of ill-will among ordinary people who had been inclined towards a live-and-let-live attitude, many of whom would have sided against CfA if the campaign had simply had as a goal letting people know how extreme Cathy's views actually were.

As Dan has said over and over, the best way to convince a homophobe is to show how normal LGBT folk are. Starting petty boycotts and following up with personal nastiness is the wrong way to do it.

One thing that puzzles me, however, is how Dan reconciles is sweeping anti-Christian posts with the fact that Self (the writer of the essay Dan linked to) is a Christian.