A man with a knife, a Tyga obsession, and most likely a few beers in him allegedly picked and seemingly won a Ravenna bar fight on August 2. The trouble began at around 1:00 a.m. when a customer—who staff later reported had been "rude all night"—requested that the DJ play “any song by the music group ‘Tyga*,’” according to a police report filed by Officer Joseph Bender.

The request was denied. The suspect then reportedly said he'd pay cash to hear just one Tyga song. "[The DJ] asked how much he would pay," the report states, and in response, the ardent Tyga fan allegedly pulled out a wad of cash in one hand and a knife with a a six-inch blade in the other, asking the DJ “which he would prefer” in exchange for the song.

The DJ promptly played a Tyga song. Sadly, the report does not specify which song.

From there, things went from Tyga to Ntense**.

The Scarlett Tree staff tried to usher the allegedly aggressive, knife-wielding man out the front door, but they "were not having much success," the report understates. It seems the man wanted to leave out of the bar's back door. On his way, he allegedly shoved a random bar patron who shoved him back, sparking a punching match. The pair stumblefucked their way to the back door, at which point the suspect reportedly summoned a few cohorts who had been waiting in the back alley. "A larger fight ensued," according to the report, culminating when one witness reportedly saw the main suspect pull out his knife, stab the victim, and then flee with his friends out the back door.

First responders arrived shortly thereafter. When probed for wounds, the victim reported that his "stomach hurt.” He lifted his shirt to reveal “a long deep laceration to [his] side…revealing internal fatty tissue.” The victim was rushed to a nearby hospital where the cut was deemed to be “a nine or ten inch long” and “four inches deep” laceration. On the bright side, it didn't appear to perforate any vital organs.

Officer Bender didn't comment on the current condition of the victim, and no suspect was located. At the time of filing the report, police were waiting on the Scarlett Tree to hand over surveillance footage from inside the bar that night. I do not want to watch it.

*Yes, Tyga is a rapper, not a music group. Don't tell Officer Bender.
**That is not really a thing. Forgive me.