Lordy! Brad Owen knows how to charm the fancy pants right off the rich with his talk of "quality cigars, fine wine, premium steaks and premier chocolates."

I'd love to fog up the window panes at that exclusive dinner! But the whispered promise of "Leonetti's with dinner" had all of us cut-rate cigar-smoking, Franzia-slurping, Whitman's Sampler snorfing Stranger staffers collectively scratching our heads.

Quality cigar-smoking businesspeople of Slog, we ask you: