I just wanted you to know that I passed on your advice to "fuck first" to one of my best friends. She got married this past weekend. In a conversation a few weeks before the wedding she expressed some concern about "wedding night" sex. Not that she was a virgin, but she seemed stressed about it. I suggested that she find some time after the rehearsal dinner to make it happen. On the day of the wedding, she confessed that she had taken the advice, and she seemed quite happy about it—and was much more relaxed the whole day of the wedding. Turns out your advice applies to all kinds of situations!

Matron Of Honor

My response after the jump...


Thanks for sharing, MOH, and while my "fuck first" advice does indeed apply to all sorts of situations (birthdays, weddings, visits to the DMV, and obviously funerals), it was intended for Valentine's Day—which is tomorrow. Remember, folks, fuck before that big romantic V-Day meal because you're going to be too bloated, too drunk, or too gassy to fuck after. Fuck first, then go to out to dinner. If you feel like fucking again when you get home, Yahtzee. If not, no big deal. Curl up in bed and watch House of Cards instead.

Happy Valentine's Day, everybody!