This is a rejection letter a friend of mine recently received...


Dear M...

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but unfortunately…
(Are you sitting? I think you should sit.)

… you have not been selected. Don’t take it personally! In this cruel game of life, everyone feels left out at one time or another (some more than others, but that’s just the way the stale cookie crumbles). It doesn’t mean we didn’t like you (we did!). It just means someone else blew our minds with their crazy ninja skills, and we couldn’t help but hire someone with crazy ninja skills. It’d be like someone offering us a unicorn ride and us saying “nah, I think we’ll just walk.”

I wish you the best of luck in your job search!

Best regards...

Human Resource...

My friend is not a unicorn; my friend is just a walk.