Where's a link to one of those cartoons recaptioned to "Christ what an asshole" when you need one?
Oh my god, this reads almost like satire.

Which I wish it was.

But I know it isn't.

Capitol Hill is dead.

Long live Capitol Hill?
Funny. It's spelled Visconti, though. No "h".
@2: it is.

This is satire.
I'm not sure, but my Dad taught me never to buy a new car in odd years, but only in even years. That's when I trade in my old Ferrari. And I eat my $17 burger in the car.
April first isn't for months yet.
Don't they realize that all of the really cool kids are buying Teslas these days?
It's not satire if it's true...
Let me guess. MSFT's CEO thinks this is "cheap", and will undertip women who work there?
Please update to answer the question of whether this is real or not.
@13 Seriously?! It's not real. Geez.

I almost posted the same thing, Fnarf.
It's hard to imagine anything lamer than driving a Ferrari in Seattle.

Driving a convertible Ferrari?
@15, 16: If the city had it's way....just DRIVING in Seattle.
If it's satire, it's too true to be funny.

"...a combination hunting lodge and '80s video arcade."

And on that day, the city died.
Fuck Meinert and fuck Ferrari liberals.
"photo by Jonathan Swift."

Ah. There it is.
Okay, I'm properly chagrined - and thankfully so, I might add. In my defense, I am also as sick as a dog, so my bullshit meter is askew.

On the other hand, this may be fake, but they are buying Grim's, so in a way, it's actually quite relevant (other than the douche-baggery, which I initially skimmed over).
Zing! Pity that Reddit and Gawker love Meinert after the fallout from the Tom Morello fracas. The don't know him like we do.

I really came her to give props @ 10 just because.
Spend less money buying new ventures, and more money paying your employees AT LEAST $15/hr. Try it out.
Dammit! I got fooled. You win this round Slog...
I totally don't get the stereotype that an Oldsmobuick is an old man's car. Ferraris and Porsches and Laborghinis are what old men drive. At least the creepy ones.
Good news for high-end car repair shops!
This isn't satire. It's a prediction.
I always thought Meinert was somewhat of a used car salesman...
And yet, there really is a Ferrari dealer on Capitol Hill.
The "indigenous population"? You mean the people who moved there 10 years ago, or the people who pushed out the black community in the CD? Too bad you couldn't build a big wall around the hill so you could keep all of us new migrants out.
I read the first couple paragraphs with increasing horror, and then skipped down to the comments and heaved an embarrassed sigh of relief. It's not so much that I can't imagine those guys buying the Ferrari dealership, it's that it was all too easy to imagine the Stranger having sunk to writing such a blathery advertorial. Even a year or two ago, I'd have thought it was great satire... but it would probably have been written by one of the better writers, who have already left.
you know it's fake because "crowded lost lake diner"
Even if I could afford a Ferrari I wouldn't buy one. Someone would key the door or run into it on purpose. Totally over the top. My Toyota Camry will do just fine.
Sean Nelson this is probably my favorite piece of yours.

It just rules that people are like, yeah, I could see them doing that. That bad huh? Ha ha.

Thank you Sean. I needed the LOL.
Posers solidifying their reputation as self-aggrandizing, self obsessed douche bags. They are milking money from the masses one drink at a time to fuel their Ferraris while their employees all speak hushed tones about the Empire so as not to piss off the Emperors and get summarily sacked.

The joke is on you Capitol Hill.

It used to be a fun place, now it is swarming with douche bags like these guys.
Sean Nelson, you're a genius. I loved reading this.
"The entrepreneurial team responsible for revitalizing the Pike/Pine corridor..."

Rule number one of satire. Make your first sentence remotely believable.
What @37 said! Sean...he's good.
Hunters lodge, arcade, clothing shop, wine bar, fruit, and a couple Ferrari s in the basement. Makes no sense so it makes perfect sense; only in Seattle. Wierdly enough this might sell more Ferraris. Just put a casino in the basement with a firemans pole to get down there. Cha Ching!! Love it I will probably be the first to get kicked out, can't wait!! Ps if your hating on this or any other thing in life. Get your head out of your ass and get yours, for you. Lemons lemons

Please wait...

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