Blogs Apr 3, 2015 at 6:00 am

Police Reports Illustrated: Want a Bag of Onions? You Better Ax Somebody

Callan Berry
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Comments

1
Mudede's Police Beat column was a lot better than this new cartoon crime thing.
dnt trust me on April 3, 2015 at 6:07 AM Report this
2
This is excellent!

Though I confess to expecting the punchline to echo last week's punchline: "What the fuck am I supposed to do with this?"
seatackled on April 3, 2015 at 7:53 AM Report this
3
If the officer had any gumption, they would have contacted residents of the building and found the owner of the onions, returned the onions, and then arrested the person for stealing a shopping cart from the store.
Banna on April 3, 2015 at 8:29 AM Report this
4
@3

She'd need evidence that he was the one to take the cart from the store, wouldn't she?
seatackled on April 3, 2015 at 8:37 AM Report this
5
So the SPD approves of chasing people with an ax if they steal vegetables... Community garden nibblers you have had your last sweet pea!
NadgeTowne on April 3, 2015 at 9:23 AM Report this
6
@1: you like something else better than Callan's cartoons? You, sir, are a cad and a bounder.
originalcinner on April 3, 2015 at 9:24 AM Report this
7
Since when do we worry about evidence?
Banna on April 3, 2015 at 9:49 AM Report this
8
Another fantastic Police Report Illustrated! What a weird place we live in. Thanks Callan for sharing what goes on each week on the Street and with the SPD
Blownoring on April 3, 2015 at 10:40 AM Report this
9
@7
When we have cops returning stolen bags of onions?
seatackled on April 3, 2015 at 10:46 AM Report this
10
@3: Yes, that would be an excellent use of police resources.
bigyaz on April 3, 2015 at 11:06 AM Report this
11
@5 This is good to know. Maybe I can start growing peppers again (and manage to get some for myself).

But let them eat the sweet peas if they're taking stuff. They're toxic. You mean snap or snow peas?
viiless on April 3, 2015 at 1:43 PM Report this
12
I would cut somebody if they're stealing my Walla Walla Sweets onions!
sugarbear on April 3, 2015 at 6:36 PM Report this
13
And Seattle Illustrated just keeps on getting crazier!
Why do I hear Seal (ca. 1994) right about now...? "...and you can never-ever surVIVE..un-less...you get a little...CRA-zy..." Must be from my AIS days......
auntie grizelda on April 3, 2015 at 8:04 PM Report this
14
"This is a reasonable thing to think and do" is the funniest panel.

Unrelated, but I don't care for the new commenting system that doesn't allow you to look at the column and the comments at the same time.
charity on April 4, 2015 at 11:07 AM Report this
15
Dear Officers,
If something is left unsecured on public property (such as a sidewalk) it's considered ABANDONED, and therefore CAN NOT BE DEEMED "STOLEN".
Two Replies on April 6, 2015 at 12:54 PM Report this

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