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That's a good point, Dan. But hard to enforce since it's his house. Maybe have him send you cash ahead of time. And then shut down any discussion of money when you're at his house and potentially being recorded. Wouldn't want him to have incriminating material he might be able to use to blackmail you later.
Husband wants the babysitter (duh), but is ashamed/sees the relationship as inappropriate. The invitations for "self defense training" and/or ball punching clearly creepy, but motivated by a desire to connect emotionally with babysitter. Telling the wife is his way of... Rationalizing an otherwise totally inappropriate relationship.
Overall, guy is probably depressed, creepy but ultimately harmless, and should find therapy. But not a conscious manipulator.
Might it be worth having this agreement in writing, to protect her? Would not want the rich asshole to sue her should her kicks be more damaging that he anticipated. This is especially likely if the wife finds out: rather than cop to hiring the former babysitter for sex-work, hubby is likely to thrown her under the bus and claim she assaulted him.
If it is a sexual transaction then $300 an hour sounds about right.
Is it worth it though.
You have a pretty weird definition for this.
Overall I don't really feel to good about that 'read' anyhow... too many actions on dude's part to qualify for benefit-of-the-doubt.
A contract wouldn't necessarily insure her from any concerns of liability in the case that the untrained Dom inflicted permanent damage.
From what I understand (and correct me if I am wrong as I am neither a Domme nor an attorney) many professional Dom/mes who do not provide sexual services (as they are delineated by the local prostitution laws) but do otherwise "sell" other Dom/me services are often not prosecuted for prostitution, depending on that jurisdiction's laws. Just because he may find sexual stimulation with/without orgasm from their activities doesn't mean that she necessarily would be charged for selling sexual services AKA prostitution.
However, she should CYA. The guy can always turn the tables on her and "defend" himself. There are many other ways this could go all wrong including but not limited to her being charged with assault should he suddenly need emergency healthcare services. Even if he refused to press charges, she and their activities could be thrust into the public eye.
If you're going on a first date, you tell someone where you're going and give them verified details about the person you're going to see (real name, phone number, email, meeting place, etc), right? So if things start getting weird, you won't be acting when you say, "My roommate knows I'm with you, has your contact information and a copy of our emails setting up this date. Let's not give her any reason to worry. I don't want to spend the rest of my evening filling out a police report."
So in additional to Dan's advice about ball-buster and ball-bustee being honest about what's going on, I'd advise the LW to disclose the arrangement to another party. And tell the creepy dude that she's done so. THEN take his money and start kicking.
As far as protecting one's self, a string of emails back and forth can establish a clear accounting of what was intended, but there have been court cases, Ii believe in Canada and Great Britain which concluded one cannot give prior consent to assault.
I once spoke with a Domme who did a ball busting video and she said she did it to see how far she could go so she really loved the session.
But genital contact of any kind (even in the form of CBT) would count as sex and as prostitution if money changed hands and the authorities found out.
It'd be less of a concern if he was just subby and wanting her to pin HIM.
Without knowing the other person very very well, and being 100% sure that, if things go wrong and he is irrevocably injured he won't press charges, I would strongly advise the LW not to do this.
Either way, not a great idea.
The problem is that what you suggest is not a defense.
"Section 647(b) of the California Penal Code defines prostitution as “any lewd act between persons for money or other consideration.”
Unfortunately, that law does not articulate what constitutes a “lewd act” so you will have to turn to case law and court decisions for accepted definitions. That will take the efforts of an attorney.
Even then, his interpretation may be different from that of an investigating officer. I know some officers who would not bat an eye at what you propose and the thought of arresting you wouldn’t cross their minds, however, my prior captain’s personal morality is such that he would perceive a clear cut violation and hook you up in a heartbeat.
The whole thing may come down to what the prosecutor will or will not give a criminal filing on after an arrest has been made."