Hey, Ethics and Elections Commission: I Fucking Intend to Run for Mayor, All Right? - The Stranger | Comments

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1

Bullshit. Once they call the race for you, you'll be drunk with power in minutes. You'll end up ruling this town with an iron fist for the next decade.

on March 20, 2009 at 3:08 PM

2

Well, it is a Friday...

Are all the members of The Stranger present and accounted for?

on March 20, 2009 at 3:15 PM

3

Oh, c'mon. How many weekdays at 2:30 can someone find you in the office. When did you drag your stoned ass into the office this morning?

on March 20, 2009 at 3:15 PM

4

@1,

I then will move to Seattle and head up the Gay/Straight Alliance Shock Troops. Look out, Talibangelists!

on March 20, 2009 at 3:19 PM

5

Dan, to win you have to add these things to your platform:
1) Bringing back the monorail (for the hell of it)
2) Bringing back the sonics (or at least trying)
3) Bringing in salt trucks

I guarantee you'll win.

Campaign shirts should say "HEY PORTLAND, OURS IS BIGGER" (re: Sam Adams) and "ELECT DAN SAVAGE OR I'LL CHOKE YOU". In extra-large impact font.

Also, you should follow up on this morning's threat. It would be impossible to have a controversy any larger than that, so no mudslinging could stop you! Unless you've slept with underaged interns, in which case, leave in shame.

on March 20, 2009 at 3:21 PM

6

Iron fist? I thought Dan would be more of the type to rule it with a latex-gloved fist.

on March 20, 2009 at 3:27 PM

7

is your reading comprehension this low in real life or just on the internet?

on March 20, 2009 at 3:30 PM

8

I totally want my "ELECT DAN SAVAGE OR I'LL CHOKE YOU" shirt. Someone want to get on CafePress and get the ball rolling?

on March 20, 2009 at 3:34 PM

9

Run, you've got the KKK vote in the bag.

on March 20, 2009 at 3:38 PM

10

@8: Credit Baconcat.

... just kidding, nobody does that shit around here. Just remember: Impact is your font friend.

on March 20, 2009 at 3:39 PM

11

Don't run; Boss Nickels is preferable to Richard Conlin.

on March 20, 2009 at 3:40 PM

12

So, basically your platform is the plot to Brewster's Millions, without the racism, baseball, or conspicuous consumption of enormous wealth?

on March 20, 2009 at 3:44 PM

13

Dan I would be willing to accept something less than a compromise on pitbull-issues if you are willing to compromise your 24 hour promise of Mayorship for something a little longer-lasting.

on March 20, 2009 at 3:46 PM

14

I will not serve.

This is one of those times when we like it that Mr. Savage doesn't go around thinking honesty is the be all and end all.

on March 20, 2009 at 3:54 PM

15

Oh Gawd. Did you NOT follow the mess with Dino Rossi? If you announce you need to file before anyone gives you any money. If you are aware of any money being raised for you, you are immediately subject to the campaign disclosure laws.

Quityerbitchin. It was a legit question on their part.

Please announce in a headline that you will accept no donations and they will leave you alone. Oh wait -- they will make all the advertizing you are getting on these pages subject to in-kind value. So maybe you should shut the f** up and let other non related types set up a Facebook page (not the media) and see how many people join.

On the other hand, maybe they just want to make you aware of the dealines in case you actually want to be on the ballot? Or are you now a write in protest vote.

on March 20, 2009 at 3:54 PM

16

Wayne Barnett is the Executive Director of the Ethics and Elections Commission. Bob Mahon is the Chairman. http://www.seattle.gov/html/citizen/elec…

on March 20, 2009 at 3:55 PM

17

@15 just fyi, fuck facebook.

on March 20, 2009 at 3:58 PM

18

Dear Dan,

Please stop writing about your intentions to run and your interactions with SEC, and just RTFM already.

on March 20, 2009 at 3:59 PM

19

You realize if you do resign, IF the council selects one of their members and doesn't just pick Greg Nickels again (which is possible through the city charter), the position of mayor will just come up again in the next special or general election?

So, you're running so that Nickels won't be mayor for a few months, maximum? We had a special election in February this year, so you might be denying Nickels the mayorship for a whole two weeks.

C. PERSONS FILLING VACANCIES IN ELECTIVE OFFICE; LENGTH OF TERM: A person who thus succeeds to fill a vacancy in an elective office shall hold such office until a successor is elected and qualified. Such successor shall be elected at the next regular municipal general election or at a special election held in concert with the next state general election, whichever occurs first[...]

If you run for mayor for REAL, I will volunteer a lot of time and money. As it is, you're just wasting a ton of taxpayer money on an extra mayoral election and I probably won't vote for you.

on March 20, 2009 at 3:59 PM

20

I'll bet you could get that idiot Shepard Fairey to design a poster for you.

on March 20, 2009 at 4:00 PM

21

@19. Based on the text you quoted, there would be a special municipal election in November 2010, the next state general election.

If Nickels actually lost to Dan, I think he'd see the writing on the wall.

on March 20, 2009 at 4:02 PM

22

@17
Exactly my point.

on March 20, 2009 at 4:05 PM

23

@21: Okay... so Dan would delay Nickels' mayorship for 11 months IF the city council doesn't just pick Greg Nickels as Dan Savage's replacement, which they'll probably do, since obviously none of them wants to run for mayor.

Dan Savage's plan will only work if:

1) Dan wins the election despite him not running for real (he would win if he did run for real)
2) City council doesn't pick Greg Nickels as Savage's replacement
3) City council picks somebody better than Nickels
4) Greg Nickels decides he doesn't want to be mayor anymore in November 2010
5) Somebody better than Nickels wins the 2010 "Dan Savage Replacement" mayoral election

I'm pretty sure the only most likely two outcomes of this stunt are Mayor Greg Nickels AGAIN, or if Nickels decides to retire for some bizarre reason, someone like Mayor Al Runte will be elected in November 2010. I'd rather just vote for Nickels the first time, and I hate Greg Nickels.

on March 20, 2009 at 4:17 PM

24

Dan, forget Mayor. You should run for King! Like this guy! (click my name for link)

on March 20, 2009 at 4:20 PM

25

So how do the BF and the kid feel about your political aspirations?

on March 20, 2009 at 4:56 PM

26

I want a Savage for Mayor t-shirt. I did think the Portland one was funny.

on March 20, 2009 at 5:02 PM

27

I know where Bob Mahon lives if that helps, it's just along the 44 bus route ...

on March 20, 2009 at 5:36 PM

28

Isn't being a publisher of a weekly newspaper a conflict of interest with running for mayor? Wouldn't Savage have to step down from the stranger?

on March 20, 2009 at 5:39 PM

29

There is a Facebook group supporting his run. Go join it! http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=69…

on March 20, 2009 at 5:40 PM

30

Latest TOP 10 most popular names for hizzoner so far:

1. MAYOR McCHEESE

2. MAYOR McCONDO

3. MAYOR NOPLOW

4. MAYOR SNOWJOB

5. MAYOR McSLEAZE

6. MAJOR NOPLOW

7. MAYOR FUDD

8. MAYOR FAILure

9. MAJOR FAILure

10.MAYOR 5-CENTS

All the names that are just too mean to such a nice fellow, like MAYOR McFATTY, MAYOR PORK, MAJOR PORK, etc. will not be included in the Top 10 names for HIS HONOR. This is Seattle, a nice city, after all.

BREAKING NEWS:

BOSS NICKELS is rapidly rising up on list.

on March 20, 2009 at 5:40 PM

31

Why should it be Wayne Barnett's job to ask you if you are running for Mayor? He probably had no idea until the reporter called him.

on March 20, 2009 at 5:40 PM

32

@31,

Um, it actually is part of his job - if Savage is a candidate (I hesitate to say serious candidate) he needs to comply with SEEC requirements, which Barnett is charged with enforcing.

on March 20, 2009 at 6:11 PM

33

I love this. Thank you.

on March 20, 2009 at 7:49 PM

34

Dan, this is your therapist. We need to ratchet it up to 3 times a week.

on March 20, 2009 at 10:44 PM

35

Dan Sucks! Vote Savage

on March 21, 2009 at 2:09 AM

36

Oh Dan, run Dan run! I'm gonna fuck you so good and so long and so hard using my extensive library of Dan quotes. You think everyone in this city is like the adolescent Slog crowd you cater to Dan? You think the average citizen will find your snark amusing? Think about what you've posted on Slog Dan. Run Dan RUN!!! I'll tear you a new asshole.

on March 21, 2009 at 10:29 AM

37

@36,

You might think of finding a new hobby.

on March 21, 2009 at 11:01 AM

38

@36, that sounds awesome, regardless of whether or not he runs.

on March 21, 2009 at 1:27 PM

39

You should break a campaign promise... and be mayor for a week.

Then shred the "business license" shakedown, fire the bums and make things happen.

on March 21, 2009 at 2:21 PM

40

Running for dog-catcher is more befitting a man of your limited intelligence....

on March 21, 2009 at 4:25 PM

41

@38

I'm on it. I've emailed some Dan highlights to Emily Heffter at the Seattle Times. The lady, apparently not a goat blower, who wrote the article that has Dan so happy. I also put up a couple of Dan's good SLOG moments in the comments section. I am emailing some of that stuff to Amy Goodman who, if I recall correctly, is represented by the same speakers bureau as Dan. I'll send some stuff over to KOMO and the other TV stations after Dan's campaign kicks into gear. And of course there will be flyers and posters in various neighborhoods. Perhaps a website with downloadable flyers and posters for those of us who don't love good ole Dan. And, although I'm not a supporter of Nickels, I should send some Dan slog posts to his campaign just to wet their whistle-so to speak.
Run Dan RUN!!!!!!!

on March 21, 2009 at 5:08 PM

42

@38

I'm on it. I put a few of Dan's slog posts up in the SeaTimes comments section following Emily Heffter's article. And I emailed her a few. Perhaps I'll set up a website featuring some of Dan's best work. Awhile back I posted a comment at the PI site about Dan's supporting the Iraq war and a couple commenters responded that it wasn't possible that a leftie like Dan would ridicule liberals and support the war. Before I could post the link to Dan's pro-wear essay someone else did it for me.

Ill edit some of Dan's best stuff and send it around to various journalists (including KOMO) and the Mayor's campaign office. The Mayor won't get his hands dirty with Dan's crap; he has other people to do that for him.

This will be fun!!

Ya know-I think I'll send that stuff to Amy Goodman too. She is represented by the same speakers bureau as Dan. And there must be others, who like the PI commenter, would be surprised at the viciousness and cruelty and outright bullying that is Dan Savage.

on March 21, 2009 at 5:17 PM

43

Oh my! I thought the first post didn't go through.

on March 21, 2009 at 5:18 PM

44

Run Dan run! We, you and I, will show the world the real Dan. the anti-social juvenile bully who views human suffering as sport and human beings as stepping stones.

on March 21, 2009 at 5:21 PM

45

Manic stalker troll who posts over and over again. You look nuts.

on March 21, 2009 at 6:00 PM

46

jeez
How tiresome is this going to get before Dan gets a new bone to gnaw on?
The whole 'will Dan run' thing just might bore the trolls out of here.

on March 21, 2009 at 6:44 PM

47

alion@45

I don't mind looking nuts. It's like advertising. it's like how Dan's president Bush ran for office. You keep repeating something until it sinks in. In this case I will use Dan's words to take a bit of the shine off Dan's carefully cultivated brand. Dan is a bully. A jerk who who will use anyone and anything to promote himself. When he supported the invasion of Iraq he went too fucking far. Those are real people being maimed and killed in that war. I may not be able to get to so called liberal assholes like Andrew Sullivan who supported the war, but I can get to Dan. And I'm going to use his own words to pull his covers off and show the world what he really is. This run for Mayor will be my tool. And there are plenty of people out here ready to climb onto the bandwagon. You fucking adolescents can't even vote. A lot of help you'll be for good old Dan. You going to contribute your allowance to his campaign?

on March 21, 2009 at 7:23 PM

48

Hmmm. Like I said. Nuts. And since a majority of the people you will be addressing at first supported the war (not me, but the majority of Americans did) you will just be jamming their own past opinions in their faces--not pointing out anything shocking about Dan. And Dan changed his opinion and has done a shit load to fight the conservatives. A shit load. You gonna balance that out? And I've seen enough kindness done by Dan, and people helped by Dan, to offset any kind of assholery talk he sometimes does. When it comes down to it, he shows a helluva a lot of decency. You, on the other hand, seem more like the destructive type. You are rather destructive, aren't you? You are rather maniacal, aren't you? Don't you think that's going to show? It does, you know. And it will the more you rant away wherever you rant away.
Nuts and destructive and kind of mean. And jerky. Yep. You.

on March 21, 2009 at 7:48 PM

49

Of course I address all of that above in my previous comments at the troll.

To Dan-- you are damn provative. I don't always know what to think of it. But as I'm letting this settle in, I think stirring the pot can sure make things interesting and maybe get some stimulating conversation brewing in this city. But you sure do take a lot of heat in the process. Brave or foolhardy. Probably both. Which forward movers usually are.

on March 21, 2009 at 7:58 PM

50

typo above. I meant "provocative"--you are damn provocative. That's better...

on March 21, 2009 at 8:01 PM

51

Dan is human, like the rest of us, a mix of angel and asshole. He's not a monster, nor is he a saint. He's human.

on March 21, 2009 at 8:02 PM

52

Latest TOP 10 most popular names for hizzoner so far:

1. MAYOR McCHEESE

2. MAYOR McCONDO

3. MAYOR NOPLOW

4. MAYOR SNOWJOB

5. MAYOR McSLEAZE

6. MAJOR NOPLOW

7. MAYOR FUDD

8. MAYOR FAILure

9. MAJOR FAILure

10.MAYOR 5-CENTS

All the names that are just too mean to such a nice fellow, like MAYOR McFATTY, MAYOR PORK, MAJOR PORK, MAYOR BIGMAC, etc. will not be included in the Top 10 names for HIS HONOR. This is Seattle, a nice city, after all.

We are monitoring the TIMES, P-I, Weakly, and Strangler for the most mentions in comments from the citizenry.
Newest contenders:
MAYOR DISASTER, MAJOR DISASTER, MAYOR QUIMBY, BOSS NICKELS, MAYOR NOSALT, MAYOR NICKELBAGS

on March 21, 2009 at 8:06 PM

54

Dan is a self-promoting Rush LImbaugh type. His style is different, but he's the same type. Human suffering is a joke to Dan. He advocated dropping bombs on Iraqi children just to be an inconoclast in the "liberal" community he purportedly exists in. Then after the bodies piled up high enough to elicit public outrage he issued a mea culpa. And you folks say "Dan is human, like the rest of us, a mix of angel and asshole. He's not a monster, nor is he a saint. He's human. " But all those people are still dead. All the people with brain damage and amputated limbs have to live with their injuries. And Dan, perhaps America's most well known cocksucker, gets a free ride. He's Gay. They won't let him into the military. He'll never have to fight like some poor fucking kid, influenced by guys like him and Limbaugh, who joined the Army and went to Iraq to fight for freedom and got killed or damaged for the rest of his life. No you sloggers place too much value on the juvenile entertainment Dan provides. He's an anti-social asshole and his very own words prove it.

on March 21, 2009 at 8:55 PM

55

Dan's platform:

*YES to war on Iraq
*Blacks are homophobes
*No more pit bulls!
*No smelly dogs in restaurants
*No fatties
*Shoplifting is okay

on March 21, 2009 at 8:56 PM

56

alion-that's a Korean car, isn't it?

Good to see Dan is reading this shit. Run Dan run!!!!

on March 21, 2009 at 8:57 PM

57

Last post Dan. I'll be watching your campaign closely. And responding to it in different ways. Be very careful with your campaign financing Mr Savage. I'll be paying close attention to it.

on March 21, 2009 at 9:46 PM

58

Yeah, Savage is REALLY good at gaming electoral politics. Remember when he told us all to support Bush against McCain in 2000 because we would support the "weaker" primary candidate. That turned out well.

No, Dan's actions only help Nickels because he will only siphon off votes from another challenger. Get out and stop wasting our time.

on March 22, 2009 at 8:07 AM

59

Brad, Brad, Brad "stop wasting our time." Why is it always all about you Brad? Why can't it be all about Dan for a change. Dan wants to run for Mayor we should all support his contribution to democracy. It's not easy running for office. the better you do the more attention you get from the media. the media starts looking closely at your past behavior. How many of us could stand an intense investigation into every little thing we have done and said over the past decades? Dan is to be applauded for his courage in seeking office and making a real contribution to his community.

on March 22, 2009 at 9:37 AM

60

Dan, here are some choice quotes from your past that you might want to use for your campaign literature:

"KOMO's Marlee Ginter Might Be Sucking Off Goats"
"Vanessa Ho didn’t ask it because she’s a stupid fucking credulous hack"
"...stop acting like butter wouldn't melt in your butt, (Jamie) Pedersen"
"Say YES to War on Iraq

on March 22, 2009 at 10:24 AM

61

51
Dan's asshole leaks, however.

on March 22, 2009 at 11:35 AM

62

Dan Savage for Mayor!!!! Let's have a public dialog about how Dan earns his living. Let's have a public dialog about the lengthy trail of controversial comments made and positions taken by Dan leading up to this hubristic campaign.

Suggestion: Dan should hold town hall style meetings in every neighborhood in the city. Get off Capitol Hill dan. get out of your comfort zone. Hold public meetings with a format in which you state your well thought out positions on the many problems facing Seattle and then invite the audience to ask you questions-about anything. Of course you will have published links on your campaign website to the entirety of your writings. People might ask you if you truly believe KOMO's Marlee Ginter blows Goats. And if so-what evidence you have. Or if not-why you would say such a slanderous thing. And Dan, as you know that's just a start.

on March 22, 2009 at 6:49 PM

63

@62, yes, a public airing of all Dan's fine works and personal life would be just the thing to seal his election. He should get Stan Lippman to be his campaign manager.

on March 22, 2009 at 7:59 PM

64

Finally, a candidate who will orally service all the doorhandles in City Hall after he is elected!! That gets my vote ...

on March 22, 2009 at 9:21 PM

65

If any of you really want to knock Dan down, please stick to the stuff that makes sense. Marlee Ginter was guilty of misleading and inaccurate reporting regarding a sex club "seeking federal funds", and Dan made a joke about her, suggesting that the idea that "she might be sucking goats" was not unlike her false claims that the club was "seeking federal funds". It's a trivial, and not hilarious thing for him to have said, but he was just making a point about KOMO's standards. If you honestly can't come up with better evidence of his poor qualifications, I'm afraid that your "library" of quotes -- and all the time you have spent hoping for a trip-up -- will come to naught.

on March 23, 2009 at 12:55 AM

66

Dan Savage for Mayor: Just to piss people off.

on March 23, 2009 at 6:54 AM

67

One problem you need a spine to run...only thing Savage has are scales which he uses to slithers around licking knobs all day...Pathetic..Oh..wait he is a liberal...par for the course

on March 23, 2009 at 12:04 PM

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