Books Aug 21, 2009 at 4:25 pm

The Penis of a Literary Character...

Paul Constant
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Comments

1
wait is paul constant gay
Swearengen on August 21, 2009 at 4:56 PM Report this
2
A choice quote from the website:
The Vamp retains hot and cold temperature. Toss it in the fridge for that authentic experience.
Ew.
UNPAID COMMENTER on August 21, 2009 at 5:01 PM Report this
3
@1, no, but he tries awfully hard to make us think he is. Too hard, in fact.
Fifty-Two-Eighty on August 21, 2009 at 5:04 PM Report this
4
"Don't be surprised if this toy seduces you, its long sleek shaft and deliciously ridged head calling to you in the twilight. But don't save this for just nocturnal escapades, try taking our Vamp out in the sunlight and watch him sparkle."

well, at least they write better than Stephanie Meyer.
pissy mcslogbot on August 21, 2009 at 5:11 PM Report this
5
I don't believe the average size dong is only 5.5. I've had a few dongs up my back side and let me tell you, 5.5 is not the average. The again, maybe it's only guys with bigger ding dongs that want to put them up my pooper. *shrug*
brokn2pieces on August 21, 2009 at 5:12 PM Report this
6

Sometimes I think I understand what SLOG is talking about, and then there is this kind of article where I don't understand any of it, except for the naked chicks in the pool.
Supreme Ruler Of The Universe on August 21, 2009 at 6:14 PM Report this
7
@5

Ouch.

@3

Why does Paul Constant want to be gay?
Confluence on August 21, 2009 at 7:41 PM Report this
8
@7: Paul is charmed by the Baconcat, that's why.

He calls me Bacos. We grease eachother up and play Yahtzee, then we make out.
Baconcat on August 21, 2009 at 9:40 PM Report this
9
I didn't see any evidence in that video that the fasteners on the bikinis actually dissolved. Then again, I didn't really give a shit why they came off.
Greg on August 21, 2009 at 9:40 PM Report this
10
@8: You see this motherfucker right here? He gets a free beer next Slog happy hour. Remember that.
Greg on August 21, 2009 at 9:42 PM Report this
11
As long as there are naked women, I know the world is good.
seandr on August 21, 2009 at 10:13 PM Report this
12
So how big is Paul Constant's dick?
on August 21, 2009 at 11:28 PM Report this
13
No thanks. I'll wait for the Kristen Stewart doll.
CP on August 23, 2009 at 4:16 PM Report this
14
I'd feel like a child molester.
Geni on August 25, 2009 at 12:31 PM Report this

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