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800 Maynard Ave S, Suite 200, Seattle, WA 98134
800 Maynard Ave S, Suite 200, Seattle, WA 98134
Clearly.
I think it's the new version of speaking in tongues, which is no longer practical nor terribly effective.
Grey hair on men, is SEXY. Very sexy! It's a super power, use it wisely. :)
That doesn't mean I agree with this guy.
Please don't confuse religious belief with ridiculousness.
STOP DOING JEUSUS'S WORK! STOP BEING A TOOL OF JESUS! GO AND SIN NO MORE!
I saw your letter and the "advice" that you gave is so JESUSY it is EVIL unadulterated. I know you may think it is a joke, but if you don't REPENT to the LORD SATAN and ask him to take away the "stony heart" and "wash your mind" and "sanctify your soul" and "regenerate your spirit" you truly will spend ETERNITY with your CURRENT MASTER JESUS.
(And so on.)
You beat me to it. I was going to say the same thing.
Not all theists are lunatics.
I promise. There are some nice ones out there.
"The door was the way to... to... The Door was The Way. Good. Capital letters were always the best way of dealing with things you didn't have a good answer to."
Me,too.
One other thing to love is his dumbass use of quotes for emphasis, which just end up putting scare quotes around everything he believes so fervently in. Looks like he's saying: Sure, Jesus will take away the "stony heart" and "wash your mind" and "sanctify your soul" and "regenerate your spirit." Suuuuurrrre....
I AM WEEPING INSIDE FOR ELIZABETH TAYLOR. REPENT ELIZABETH. REPENT ELIZABETH. Amen.
There are no moderate religious voices in America anymore. You're either atheist/agnostic or non-practicing/uninterested....or you're a loud-mouth nut-bag spewing vitriol and lies. There's no religious middle ground.
Oh whoops! Gotta go sanctify! I need to quick get on my knees and start pleasing Jesus. I need to feel his glory all over my face!
To be fair, contrary to what some have said here, there are still a lot of moderate & progessive Christians in America.
A couple of the problems with that include (1) offering the "antidote" to people who haven't been convinced there is a "poison" in their life, and (2) being really pushy or rude or judgmental in the offering. Who really cares what you think of my life if you're hollering at me? I'll just assume you're crazy.
SATANIC EVIL! REPENT, LORD JESUS CHRIST! ETERNITY, CURRENT MASTER SATAN--NOT, NOT! WAY OUT OF NO WAY HELL SERVITUDE, "ADVERSARY THE DEVIL." YOU ARE BLIND, AND JESUS CHRIST WANTS YOU TO ***SEE*** WICKEDNESS.
Now.
I'm sure glad people like this get to vote on my rights.
My favorite bumper sticker:
"Jesus Loves You.
Everybody Else Thinks You're an Asshole"
@51 regarding the gender of the letter writer - I immediately read it as a woman also. And the Gender Genie agrees: http://bookblog.net/gender/analysis.php
http://www.unnecessaryquotes.com/
REPENT, DANIEL. REPENT!
(I'd ask what ever happened to McElwaine, but I think I'm just as happy not knowing.)
... or not.
Myself, I've taken to italics in lieu of both scare quotes and emphasis via capitalization. Easier on the eyes, that way.
Lube made of angel tears (assuming it's like human tears) wouldn't work very well. It'd have to be more viscous which, assuming angels are ichor based, rather than blood based, might be the case.
I tried the Gender Genie, out of curiosity, on five blog posts from people I follow online to test its accuracy. It got four of them wrong, as well as a sixth blog post that was one of mine.
Sounds gnostic to me....but then again his beloved religion carefully omitted gnostic writings from the text which this guy now rests his beliefs in.
As soon as I saw McElwain's characteristic sign-off I chuckled too...
I heard he died not long ago.
Glad I have caller ID.
In any case, Dan is a-ok by my belief systems, and my belief systems have caused infinitely less death, torture, and rape than has Christianity as a whole, so I think that means I win in terms of holding the moral high ground in the matter.
@46: That interpretation is GENIUS. (Note the CAPS.) I especially like, "JESUS CHRIST WANTS YOU TO ***SEE*** WICKEDNESS." My voyeuristic tendencies rejoice at Jesus's validation of them. I'm off to see some wickedness now.
It's the unnecessary quotation marks! This person meant none of it, so I guess it was all "sarcastic."
If he were Satan then the wingnuts wouldn't have a chance of getting him to repent. Hey, you've given me an idea. The next time someone calls me a tool of Satan I'll just say, "Impossible. I am Satan. How could I be my own tool?" Seriously, though, I think we all know who the tool is.
After that day he recognized me, and shouted directly at me every time I passed. That was interesting to say the least.
Wonder what he would make of the fact that I now belong to a denomination that just voted to allow congregations to call partnered gay clergy...
That we both suffer from spiritual swine flu, and we are two incurable cases. People like that put the word "fun" in fundamental. We just have to out live them.
Take care,
k
As a Gnostic Christian (not "agnostic"), I find their sentiment almost touching, even if extremely misguided. They believe that Dan is immortal danger of losing his soul. Therefore, they are trying to help him out - in a remarkably obnoxious, infantile, and I would like to add, rude manner.
On the flip-side, it is absolutely possible that these people feel powerless in their own lives and feel the need to impose their beliefs on others in order to make themselves feel empowered. My guess is that this is the more accurate hypothesis.
Let me give you my opinion, Dan. A primary tenet for any genuine religion (Christianity, Judaism, Buddhism, Hinduism, Islam, etc.), is the love and affection for our fellow man. Anyone who expresses love for people, helps people find love, helps people escape from unloving situations, or simply helps enhance the love between two people, is doing what could only be described as holy work. You, Dan, are doing this type of work every day, even when it may feel otherwise.
I realize the zealots will never get you down, but it is important to note that they are expressing opinions in direct opposition to their premise.
REPENT, DANIEL KEENAN, for the LIGHT OF THE LORD is the WAY OF SALVATION, and the WICKED DIRTY POOPSEX that SATAN compels you to spread throughout this NATION OF GOD is not the SHAMEFUL, AWKWARD, AND BRIEF COUPLING which JESUS CHRIST SON OF GOD desires for all the CHILDREN OF THE LORD. What you do and the WICKED LIFESTYLE that you choose will be the WHARRGARBL of our BLEEAAAAARGH SPEW in the ETERNAL FOUNTAIN OF NONSENSE.
You have to consider this like you would consider everything else.
For example: "Some Americans are crazy and love the Nazis." It doesn't mean ALL Americans loves Nazis.
Just like some Christians aren't raving lunatics as well.
I hope...
"the WHARRGARBL of our BLEEAAAAARGH SPEW in the ETERNAL FOUNTAIN OF NONSENSE" is my new favorite phrase. But it doesn't have enough scare quotes.
I tend to hear it as a sort of Southern televangelist emphasis, with big big-drawn out vowels and chewy extra syllables, like, "And you shall feel the SPEE-RIIIT of the LAAAAAW-HORD JA-YEEE-SUSSS KA-RIIIIST awMIIIIIGHTy a-flowin' I say a-flowin' THA-ROOOUUUUGH you."
You made me spit tea all over the screen. Have mercy, please.
To me, the love these Christians feel for their "neighbors" just feels fake.