Blogs Mar 8, 2010 at 11:30 am

Comments

1
Um, I assume you thought of just using humor, hardcore, and best in show? That would provide a category for any movie, and if one is great enough to sweep all three, then so be it.
2
Best In Show is a definite. I think Humor and Hardcore should be kept. The new category should be Most Original or Creative. Those will have different meanings to people, and sure one film can still win 3 of the 4, but if it's that good maybe it should.
3
Well, and what if a movie has gay and straight? Where does it fall then??
4
@3: Good point.
5
I don't like the Gay/Straight binary either. Sex is a continuum, and I think some of the best films could blur those lines.
6
Best in Show:$2k
Best Humor:$1k
Best Erotic:$1k
Runner Up Humor: $500
Runner Up Erotic: $500
7
What about best in show, best comedy, best hardcore, best production(or best art direction)? That could get the artsy ones, funny ones, hardcore, and best overall.
8
I think that "Audience Choice" is a pretty standard category, yeah?
9
@6: We can do runners-up without dipping into the 5K, Michael. So if you had 6K... how would you break it up?

I like the idea of having four big awards categories—three 1K awards and one 2K Best-in-Show award. If you were going to break it up that way (four awards, two $500 runners-up, or other sub-awards)... what would it be?
10
@8 all awards are given by the audience...
11
Best In Show
Best Humor
Best Dialog
Most Creative/Original
12
What about:

Best Gay Actor/Actress ($1000)
Best Straight Actor Actress ($1000)
Best Comedy Gay or Straight ($1000)
Best of Show ($2000)
13
Hottest
Grossest
Funniest
Best In Show
14
I'd have to say putting gay and straight in different catagories just seems wrong and if I may, unnatural. Also, wouldn't it neceassrily cause eventual problems with classifying transgender themed films?
15
Dan,

When do tix go on sale? The article doesn't say...
16
Dan,

When do tix go on sale? The article doesn't say...
17
hmmmm...but, you could also honor some individual achievement as well...spread the wealth and have a party/award ceremony/fundraiser for some worthy sex oriented group.
Best in Show: $2k
Best Humor: $1k
Runner Up: Donated Prize Package
Best Erotic: $1k
Runner Up: Donated Prize Package
Best Artistic: $1k
Runner Up: Donated Prize Package
Outstanding Cinematography: Trophy/Classes at NWFilmForum? Prize package donated by sponsors
Best Performance Humor: Trophy/Prize Package donated by sponsors.
Best Performance Erotic: ditto
Best Performance Artistic: ditto
Best Performance Bravest: ditto
Up the prizes by naming awards after sponsors (if they pony up some dough)...The Cupcake Royal Prize for best humor, The Babeland Prize for best erotic, SavageLove Prize for best use of showtunes in an erotic short film, etc...
18
$1000 Best in show
$500 Lesbians most attractive to straight people
$500 Funniest gay people talking to each other in bed
$500 Most number of locations masturbated (male)
$500 Most misogynistic (animated)
$500 Artsiest unsexy film
$500 Best at reminding people how comparably normal their kinks are
$500 Most balllsy
$500 Best homage/remake
19
What ever happened to the Best Multiethnic and Best Use of a Pitbull categories?
20
$1000 Best in show
$500 Lesbians most attractive to straight people
$500 Funniest gay people talking to each other in bed
$500 Most number of locations masturbated (male)
$500 Most misogynistic (animated)
$500 Artsiest unsexy film
$500 Best at reminding people how comparably normal their kinks are
$500 Most balllsy
$500 Best homage/remake
21
My only beef is that here in Florida I can't see any of it. Is there ever going to be DVD or download availability?
22
@15, Tix for Hump! 5 went on sale online shortly before the event this year.

I imagine it will be a similar arrangement this year, but could be wrong...
23
sumbitch...I just wrote a HUGE, brilliant post and it seems to have vanished into the Intertubes...

Best in show:$2k
Best Erotic:$1k
Best Humor: $1k
Best Artistic Expression: $1k
Best Envelope Pushing/Kink: $1k

Runners up receive trophies/prize packages donated by sponsors.

Also, individual achievement awards:
Performance, Erotic
Performance, Artistic
Performance, Humor
Performance, Bravest
Cinematography
Individual Achievement awards would receive trophies/prize packages donated by sponsors. If you want to spread the wealth even more, have a "celebrity" jury give out individual awards for make-up/costumes/sets/sound/music. And the jury shouldn't just be Stranger staffers...

Also, increase prizes by selling branding opportunities to sponsors: The Cupcake Royal Prize for Best Humor; The Babeland Prize for Best Erotic; The SavageLove Prize for best use of showtunes in an erotic short film featuring nubile, hairless men, etc...

And, have a big party/awards show/benefit to give money to worthwhile charity associated with sex related issues (Planned Parenthood, Chicken Soup). Get some of our many, many local porn stars to hand out awards...and a sexy band like Partman, Parthorse to perform. And, have sexy guys/girls be "Humpies" who handover the award and escort people off stage.
24
i think i double posted...shit.

NONE of this damn Gay/Straight shit for categories...that is NOT what HUMP is about...also dumb because many of the films are ambiguous in tone.

like real life.
25
For serious, though: 100% agree with @17. This festival is so popular now that to NOT milk some kind of sponsorship from it would almost be a waste.
26
We tried to do performance awards one year... and we can list the performers on a ballot (not enough space), so we wound up getting votes for "the hung guy," and, "that woman in the one film who was so funny."

Hard to tabulate. So we dropped performance awards.

Sponsors for individual awards... easier said than done, particularly in this economy. And not a lot of businesses want to get into bed with a gonzo/amateur porn festival. Couple that with the HUGE pain in the ass that asking for, coordinating, and making good on sponsorships would be for Caroline Dodge, the Stranger's promotions manager, and... it's not going to happen.

But I like your other suggestions, Michael.
27
Srsly, some straight sap whined that the gays are funnier then they are? Well, duh!
28
@21 Unfortunately, no. If I remember correctly, in order to encourage people who might otherwise be averse to appearing in a porno film to participate (and thus make it a truly amateur festival), submissions are destroyed at the end of the festival.
29
I vote with Enigma @2

Bestest
Funniest
Hardcorest
Originalest / Creativest

And split the prizes equally, $1000 to each catagory. IMHO.
Love the HUMP!
xo
30
The long list for the performance awards could be decided by the jury and the audience votes on them...or just make performances a juried prize...i'd really like to see the performers honored since they are the ones laying it on the line for us to see in vivid gynecological detail....
31
@30: That's a great idea -- juried prizes for performers, all others awarded by audience ballot. Will take that to the rest of the gang, Mr. Strangeways.
32
Best
Hottest
Funniest
Prettiest (aka Cinematography)
33
A "Best explicit sex scene" would be nice- especially since all the top honors went to non-porn movies last year...
34
@33: That's what, theoretically, "Best Hardcore" was supposed to cover.
35
@34 hmmm... I guess my definition of "hardcore" is different than yours. I interpreted hardcore to mean something more like "most daring or outrageous sex scene". (like having a hook inserted in your anus or cigars put out on your dick.)
36
What about "Most Horrific" - because there's always a few in every Hump.
37
I agree that "hardcore" is perhaps not the best nomenclature.

I, for example, really liked the cute-girls-on-bicycles one last year. There was definitely explicit sex involved but it was so sweet that I wouldn't have considered voting for it in a "hardcore" category.
38
is there an equivilent of HUMP! in New York?
39
I think you should keep Best Humor and Best Hardcore, and then add a category for Best Artistic. That seems to describe what people are getting at.
40
3K Best in Show
1K Funniest
1K Hottest

Simple. Voting is too hard with too many catagories. Most of the time the staff is hustling you out of the theatre so the next show can start, and I barely have a chance to make a careful selection. Too many catagories will make that problem worse.

Boo to Straight and Gay awards.

One request. Can you put the title of each piece before (and after?) each piece. Some of the entires that had no titles were occasionally hard to figure out. And when two pieces without credits or titles are adjacent, the transition between pieces is instant and jarring.
41
Count me as another vote against distinguishing between gay/straight. If gay films keep sweeping awards (which doesn't sound like that's the case), then it should be on the straight folks to make funnier/hotter films. Best, Funniest, and Hottest make the most sense, and I'd say Kinkiest and Most Artistic would fit right in as well (pun!).
42
You're welcome....(pssst....put me on the jury...sounds like a fun gig...FAAAAAAAR better than the Oscars)
43
Why are you married to "Best In Show"? It's a sex-film festival/contest. Wouldn't the Sexiest film automatically BE the best in show?

$2000 Sexiest
$1000 Best Drama
$1000 Prettiest (film, people, art, whatever)
$1000 Funniest (Best Comedy)

(I'm hesitant to add Kinkiest, because that would add an easy target for people to shoot for and generate way too many intentionally gross/sophomoric entries.)
44
@43, addendum.

In case it's not obvious, I'm with the crowd that reluctantly doesn't see gay/straight as that useful a category. Things have moved on. I think straight boys and girls will vote for lesbian films, and gay and straight girls will vote for gay male films. If there's any reluctance, it's in straight boys voting for gay male film.

If you're worried about gay male films getting short shrift, though, why don't you add a Gay Male category, say for $500. They'd still be eligible for all the other prizes.
45
But what's sexy is very, very subjective. We want people to vote for what they, semi-objectively, judge to be the best film in the festival. Which may or may not be the "sexiest."
46
Best In Show: $1,000
Most Erotic: $1,000
Most Kinky: $1,000
Most Artistic: $1,000
Best Humor: $1,000

I'd love to see you add Erotic or Sexiest... I know it's porn, but can't we try to make some sexy or hot? Also, I'd say skip "hardcore" for all of the reasons above (hot librarians or cute sweet dykes aren't necessarily hardcore like meat hooks, cigars, or S&M priests).
47
I'm surprised that Gomorrah Man hasn't weighed in on this...
I second 9yrs (#46), and I think that under that plan "Best in Show" should be awarded separately from the other four bests (i.e., the best overall might be one of them and would be awarded as an extra 1k).
48
@36: I don't think we should be encouraging people to try and one-up each other in how many times they can show a cigar being put out on an old guy's penis or an anal hook being inserted ALL THE WAY.
49
Here is my vote.

Best in Show $2000
Best Humor $1000
Best Sex $1000
Best Alternative $1000

There needs to be a category for films that don't quite fit into the main categories. Every year there is something I'd like to vote for but I'm not sure how. This is Seattle for fucks sake! How can we not have an Alternative category?

All I'm saying is that the 90's were our best years.
50
I think it would be funny to include the category of "Film I'd Most Like to Star In."
51
I think it's important to keep a grand prize at $2000. Anything less rides on the edge of not being worth entering. A chance at $2000 is exciting and even if you end up winning $1000 or $500 with the chance of doubling up due to taking more than one category is a good runner up aspiration. Good enough to bring the contestant back for more in 2011.

Please wait...

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