I wonder if he had any comment on Monsters, Inc.
I personally loved that movie.
I don't know what he's talking about. I had to leave after five minutes because my kid was so freaked out.
So he's essentially bemoaning any work of children's fiction that fails to show a clear distinction between "us" and "them?"

I don't know... My four-year-old thought it was too scary to watch with her 3D glasses on. She watched the entire movie without them, while sitting in my lap, with her hands on her cheeks ready to cover her eyes during the scary parts. How scary does he think it needs to be? It's a children's movie for god's sake!
Misery loves company. People who are full of hate and fear can't understand why everyone shouldn't be. I guess it's no surprise that they'd want to start young. It's easy to terrify kids.
Shorter Goldberg: "If our kids aren't trained at an early age to be afraid, how are we going to control them as adults?"
I think you're both overreacting.
He's simply wrong. Strangers are, generally speaking, not much of a danger to kids. The danger is much, much more likely to come from a trusted figure like an uncle, teacher, scout leader, or priest.

But Jonah Goldberg is a massive ball of shit, so I'm not surprised.
fear- and loathing
Maybe the movie should have been "How to Train Your Pit Bull"?
I always find it helpful to remind myself that Jonah Goldberg would not even have a column or a punditry career if not for his mother, Lucianne.

Who is Lucianne Goldberg, you ask? Former staffer for JFK and LBJ, turned rabid Republican who "advised" Linda Tripp behind the scenes during the Monica Lewinsky scandal. She let our boy Jonah listen to the tapes of the Monica/Linda phone calls. He leaked information from them to certain select members of the press, and then parlayed these contacts into a media career.

Sort of makes you look at his talk about monsters in a whole new way, huh?
I fucking knew when I saw that movie that some wingnut tard would say that.
Dick Cheney's head on that dragon would scare the shit out of anyone.
Goldberg should be taken to the middle of the ocean, deposited on a raft and left with nothing to keep him company but a can of Spam and a rumpled copy of The Fountainhead. We can all then forget he ever existed.
Hmm, maybe Hollywood should consider making a Catholic themed horror filmed titled "How to Train A Choirboy." That sounds plenty scary.
@14 - without the churchkey.
Penn & Teller: Bullshit! episode 6.8 is an incredibly well done and moving refutation of 'stranger danger' paranoia. Part of the episode profiles a mother who did in fact have her child kidnapped and killed by a stranger, but the mother has chosen to actually fight against stranger danger paranoia because she's armed with the facts. Imnsho it's one of their very best episodes if not the best of the entire series.
Umm... there WAS a monster. Pretty blatant, pretty dangerous. It was, ya know, the climax of the movie. Hell, I was scared when I saw that that thing.

It's too bad that the audience thinks its a film for <10 y/os. It's pretty intense but also incredibly good. "Family film", not "Kids' Flick".
I want to see it. Some of the dragons, like the black one in the preview, look really cute and awesome. but I'm sure I'll have to deal with a bunch of lame dorky dialogue that 3D animation movie makers seem to think is necessary.

good writing on monsters and origins, i agree
The most troubling aspect of this crapola is the news that Goldberg actually, procreatively, spawned.
@11, thank you for bringing that up--if you hadn't, I was going to. It's important that the young 'uns understand historical connections and origins.

@20, he doesn't specify WHOSE kid he is attempting to comfort, in his bed.
Although I did find How to Train Your Dragon another example of how kids movies in the US simply can't have any story or mystery in them. In the movie the dragons end up essentially being dogs with wings in terms of how they actually behaved. It was a visually compelling movie but the story was a horrible cliche. As a matter of fact there was barely any story at all. Our kids movies assume kids are leotarded. Kids like good stories with mystery and unknown. Not every character has to reference a super simple cardboard cutout type (the bully, the wimp, the dog, the clown, the girl). Would be nice to meet some truly different characters once in a while.

In a way Goldberg is right in that it is kind of disappointing that the dragons end up being lovable pets. But his argument of WHY that's disappointing is stupid. It's not disappointing because it's not teaching kids that there is true eveil (his premise). It's just kind of boring.

Also, Goldberg is straight up wrong - the "queen" dragon at the end IS a monster.
What happens when Goldberg stumbles onto Scooby-Doo?

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