God Hates Decaffeinated Coffee


Geez, Dan, imagine how much more you could've gotten done all these years if you hadn't been sleeping 24/7...
Taking marriage advice from a Catholic priest is like taking a driver's training course from someone who has never been behind the wheel.
It's getting too damn hard to keep track of all this shit god hates.

Fuck it.
Regina Apostolorum University? That has a familiar ring.

Sants and Apostols...
We go together like
rama lama lama
ke ding a de dinga a dong
remembered for ever like
shoo bop shoo wadda wadda yipitty boom de boom

Chang chang chang-it-ty chang
That's the way it should be
Wha oooh yeah!

We're one of a kind
Like dip di-dip di-dip
Doo-bop a doo-bee doo
Our names are signed
Boog-e-dy boog-e-dy boog-e-dy
Shoo-by doo-wop she-bop
Chang chang chang-it-ty chang

We'll always be like one
is that how gaydar works? we look for the sleepy people? bedhead? puffy eyes?
How would they know? They're just mouthpieces for their pope. They should go live in the Vatican where the rest of the self hating perverts live.
@2 wins the thread.
That guy is absolutely right. Decaffeinated coffee should totally be illegal.
Everything the Vatican does these days makes makes the idea of sharing an afterlife with them much less appealing. Are they trying to start a housing slump in Heaven?
"The decaffeinated coffee market in the US was estimated to be $478
million in 2001 and $307 million in 1998."

Maybe decaf isn't for everyone.

But a lot of people seem to have the money to pay for it.

Same with gay marriage.

Over at the Nomblog, the latest bugaboo is those damned Republican elites who are coming out in favor of same sex marriage.

Cry me a river.
There aren't a lot of posts on the linked original article, but this one bears repeating:
Michael Charles8:12 am
You could use the same comparison with Roman Catholicism and Christianity.
Strange, Gonzalo never has a second cup of coffee at home.
Oooooh - religiotard fight!

The Mormons hate both gays and real coffee.
Decaffeinated coffee. Ha, good one Father! I bet the gays are still reeling from that broadside.
@13 FTW

I love a good 70's commercial reference. I'm soaking in it.
People who choose to live a decaffeinated lifestyle should be accorded all the rights and responsibilities that normal, decent people have; but if they want to start redefining coffee for everyone, then they shouldn't be surprised when society rises up and rejects them and their perverted agenda.

Seriously though, what the fuck is he talking about?
Okay, it's bad enough to deny marriage to gays, but do we really have to make them start drinking decaf, too?
What's next--only unnatural fibers?
He shoulda stuck with the near-bear analogy.
Listening to a priest give marriage advice is like buying a pair of shoes without trying them on first.
@18: Well, those bright Hawaiian shirts are polyester, aren't they?
haha that's pretty poetic i like it
I'm drinking decaf* right now - am I an abomination?

*okay, it's half caf - wonder what that means...
I am not even sure what that quote means.

And how --- ahem -- would Father know what gay relationships are like, eh?
Support for gay marriage in Seattle plummets.
@23: It means bisexual, obviously.
@26, what about 2% milk in my coffee? No es bueno?
A gay relationship is like a shot of tequila. If you don't want to have one you don't have to.
I take my coffee like my men: caffeinated.
@28: Can I have the tequila but not the homosexuality?
Where same-sex marriage is legal, funny how I keep seeing this new reoccurring theme of "your marriage isn't a marriage," or "your marriage is a sham."

Why? Because they say so? HA!

Guess the haters will say just about anything to make their worried little minds feel better. Such pissy sore losers. Seriously.
@31, in many cases it's dose-related.

Or so I've heard.
"Taking marriage advice from a Catholic priest is like taking a driver's training course from someone who has never been behind the wheel."

I have it on good authority (and personal experience) that plenty of Catholic priests are extremely experienced at driving a stick.
The best part of waking up / is peen in your vadge!
@34: +7 Internets.
I refuse to accept marriage advice from men who claim to be celibate but diddle altar boys on the down-low under the protection of an international child-rapist racket organization run by fucked up closet cases.

I assume newspapers are trying to be funny when they quote Catholic priests on this topic, because priests have got to be the fucking least credible people on the subject of marriage that one could find (tied for last place with Newt Gingrich). Might as well ask a vegan for their opinion on what is the best way to field-dress an elk.
A gay relationship is like decaffeinated coffee

So, by implication, a het relationship is like real coffee, yeah?

Something that gives you a nice kick, but should *definitely* not be your only beverage, just one of many different once you enjoy throughout the day.

Hey, I think the priest is advocating polyamory!
@13- That's strange, Gonzola never throws up at home.

(Attn: Whippersnappers, that's from Airplane!)
This guys argument is 1 sided, nothing wakes me up more in the morning than a big throbbing cock in my ass.
Funny for this statement to come out right after that study saying coffee doesn't actually wake you up. Just another example of the church denying science.
Oh those old men in skirts, they can't jump up and down indignantly without their coffee.
@39 - FTW! Looks like we picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.
This is a gem I read in the "Read More" link in the NOM post:

"...the hostility between the social conservative element of the party and those less adherent to that doctrine is already palpable. As one prominent Republican who supports gay rights put it:

“I think there is a growing mass of people in Republican politics who are fundamentally sick and tired about being lectured to about morality and how to live your life by a bunch of people who have been married three or four times and are more likely to be seen outside a brothel on a Thursday night than being at home with their kids. There is a fundamental indecency to the vitriol and the hatred directed against decent people because of their sexuality. People have reached a critical mass with this.”

One thing about decaf is that you can have cup after cup after cup, all night long if you like...
That analogy (the bishop or priest or w/e) makes absolutely no sense. Not just playing up flaws to preach to the choir, I don't even understand whether it's for or against gay marriage. I mean, I assume it's against based on the source but if Harvey Milk said I think it'd make about as much sense.
Anyone who Drinks Decaf and Diet Soda or ruins good Whisky with Water or Soda,should not be allowed to to Live !