Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood: Pearl Jam Auction, Fraud on the Hill, and Health Inspectors Gone Wild


Since I-1100 failed, does anyone know of a nearby state that would be a good liquor run?
You're a fucking moron, Loob. Health inspections save lives. Or do you think it would be cool if restaurants killed a few people before the "market" fixed it? Bat shit insane, worse than Tim Eyman.

I'm also very upset that doesn't exist.
Oh God, here we go again: Chapter 9,347 of "I'm The Unpaid Intern and I'm Smarter Than Everyone Else In The Universe!"

However did we get along without him? To think, all of these years we've been under the cruel liberal yolk of food inspections and public health. If he'd only been here during the influenza and tuberculosis epidemics, I'm sure everything would have been fine. It was just group psychosis or something.
Hey, Unpaid Intern, I it is actually important for public restaurants to be inspected. When an inspector goes out, he notes all violations and works to bring the place into compliance- no one gets fines or shut down for minor violations like these. In return we reduce food-bourne illness. SO SHUT THE F UP.
D'oh. I ate at Yen Wor Garden and Baranof when I lived in Greenwood. Never again.
@1 -- It hasn't failed yet. We're still waiting on a ton of King County returns. People here like booze. Have faith.

@Fnarf -- It might not exist, but is the domain name claimed? I smell an opportunity for you, Fnarf.
As someone who worked at a KFC many years ago for six hours, I can tell you: you are a fucking moron. There need to be 10 times as many Health inspectors, or else people wash their raw-chicken covered hands off in the dishwasher.

Improperly stored rags probably means "dirty rags in a spot where a burger is about to be." And while you're right in that you probably won't die, not having to live with uncontrollable shitting is worth a few of my tax dollars a year.

Fortunately, you're not paid anything to write your garbage.
Oh, and you aren't paying anything idiot. It is a service provided as part of the food permit fee restaurants pay.
So you guys really think the health inspectors do a great job. Because nobody ever gets food poisoning at a restaurant, right? There's no chance that we consumers could just tack a robust sort of user-generated health certification wiki onto a site like Yelp or UrbanSpoon and handle this ourselves?
I always love it when the fast-food drones wipe that stubborn black spot on the floor just outside the restrooms, then the seat bottoms, then the tables, in that order, with the same rag. Bite me, intern.
@9 Right, given how much we get it NOW, why would we want LESS PROTECTION?

You can get herpes even with a condom, are you saying we get rid of condoms?

You're really not good at this.
Oh intern, you're kidding right? A "user-generated health certification wiki"? That's your alternative to health inspections?

It's one thing to be a cheapskate, trying to make up a ideological reason for your cheapness. It's quite another to be a naive rube. Are you sure you're really from Cleveland, or did you come from some distant suburb?


The only time I've gotten food poisoning was at a restaurant in the third world. And, do tell, how many times you have gotten food poisoning anywhere.
Um, I can't speak for you, but I can tell you I don't wipe the floors in my kitchen with the same cloths I use on dishes, nor do I use the same sponge on the toilet that I use to clean the countertops. I shudder to think what YOUR kitchen must look like. I rather like the idea that there is someone out there making sure the food served to me doesn't have cockroach feces in it, the kitchen staff don't all have typhoid, there's hand soap in the staff bathrooms, and the meat didn't come from the rendering plant. I've had food poisoning (I used to be quite sloppy about food prep and storage), and I'd be very happy to never experience it again.

Food safety as a target for your pseudo-anarchist ire is a fail.
@Catalina -- Why do you think these state inspectors are so amazing? Do you really not think we could come up with an alternative? Maybe the wiki thing is too flimsy, but we could certainly band together and establish some sort of Consumer Report's-type thing for restaurants. Oh, and I am from Cincinnati.

@13 -- I've never gotten food poisoning, not even at nasty street stalls in Russia. This is part of the reason why I think health licensing is so much BS.

@14 -- My kitchen is awesome. I cook a lot. I keep things clean, just like you. My only point is that I don't have a food worker's permit and I don't wash the dishrags very often. By the logic of the state, I shouldn't even be able to prepare food for myself. I'd be better off eating processed food out of the freezer!
Wow man, you're really just taking the piss now, right? There's no way you're this outraged about the existence of food and health inspection regulations. I mean, /psyduck/
@6 nah, still failed. It's the female vote, actually.

A lot of women tell their husbands and bfs they agree with them and then vote to keep hard liquor out of the hands of the kids.

But keep wishing.

You know how clean your place is and what the consequences are if you don't clean or store things properly. Are you really dumb enough to trust a for-profit company to keep things clean for your benefit? Actually, I shouldn't even bother asking that question. OF COURSE you're that fucking dumb.
Unpaid Intern, you are Totally Off-Base regarding the restaurant inspections.

And I say that as a former food worker (kitchen production work for a locally distributed salsa company, food booth worker at fairs'n'festivals, and gourmet catering). Yeah, dude, these rules and regulations save lives - they're not there just to piss you off.
"we could certainly band together and establish some sort of Consumer Report's-type thing for restaurants"

so you propose one that overall is far less effective/reliable and without proper oversight & any enforcement ability, just let the free market sort it out?

yeah, that sounds just (moldy) peachy to me.
Intern, don't be obtuse: I never claimed the inspectors were "amazing", but they provide a valuable service, no matter what you think. Have you never worked in a restaurant?

It's like the electrical code: everything in the code is there because someone was killed, or something caught fire.
I hope he doesn't catch fire.
The liberties I may take in my kitchen don't affect the lives and health of hundreds of other people, so there is no need for it to be inspected by the state. And the fact that people get food poisoning from these establishments means they need to be using safe food prep methods, and some of them sure as hell aren't doing it of their own accord. So in the interests of everyone who buys prepared food these places need to be inspected.
i'd pay 5 dollars for that guitar, but only if Paul Allen would smash it, chew on the broken bits, and then spit it onto Jesse Bernstein's grave - all while Luby is off in a corner masturbating.

my sympathies for the deceased's family
Anyone who thinks LESS oversight will make our food safer deserves the hemorrhagic colitis they're bound to catch.
@keshmeshi -- Because clearly "for-profit" (you treat this as a slur) don't have an interest in maybe not killing or sickening potential repeat customers. Come on, man.

@19 -- I like cleanliness, too. I would just rather see it handled by consumers and consumer advocates.

@Catalina-- Funny you should mention it, I actually really want to work in a restaurant but I don't have a food handler's permit. No one will hire me here. You might think I'm being sarcastic, but I would love to own a restaurant eventually. I can cook some damn good Russian soup.

@24-- My, you are a creative one.
"Excuse me, restaurant manager? May I inspect your kitchen? I want to put my findings on this user-generated health certification wiki."
I'm pretty sure the McDonalds of the world would handle all training and health inspecting just fine if the gov't didn't do it. But they can afford it - and they couldn't afford NOT to do, since a rash of sicknesses would be national news.

But a one-off greasy spoon that's barely eking by and is already understaffed? That budget would be the first to go.
@26 That's awesome, I love a good Russian soup. I love it even more when the chef knows the right temperature to hold and serve it so that I don't get Shigellosis.
And I don't want to find out you're untrained monkey with his baba's soup recipe only after I'm suffering from bloody diarrhea. Foodborne bacterial infections don't fuck around, and no version of HealthYelp is going protect people.
@26 - You won't work in a restaurant because it requires a government license? Well, at least you are consistent. I'm guessing that's why you don't drive, either. Or fly on commercial airlines.

How did you get here from Cincinnati? I'm going to be very disappointed in you if you didn't hitchhike.
user-generated health certification wiki post for unpaid interns' damn good Russian soup bistro:

in this reviewers opinion his fare is notably bland and far too chock full of douchemonella, so go here @ your own risk.

@9: "So you guys really think the health inspectors do a great job. Because nobody ever gets food poisoning at a restaurant, right? There's no chance that we consumers could just tack a robust sort of user-generated health certification wiki onto a site like Yelp or UrbanSpoon and handle this ourselves?"

Do you really want to live in a world where you have to do your own research every time you go to a restaurant? "Hey, Matt, let's go get lunch at this new sandwich place." "Hold on, I need to see if it's safe to eat there." You may actually say (ridiculously), "Yes, I'm willing to do that, and I think everyone else should too." Let's say instead of Matt, you're an 80 year old woman going out to dinner with her friends. You have no idea what the yelpers and the urbanforks are, so you go out to eat at a restaurant with horrible health and safety reviews on yelp, get food poisoning, and die.

Does anyone else remember in the 2008 elections when John McCain kept using the examples of a planetarium and the study of bear DNA as the two most absurd examples of wasteful spending in America? It's the logic of "I don't immediately see what the benefit would be, so it must be stupid."
"it's the logic of "I don't immediately see what the benefit would be, so it must be stupid.""

thus much of the thrust of the 2010 midterm election results...
33, As a lazy overpaid ineffectual city employee, I have to wash my own city car. There's no schedule for it - I just do it when it gets ugly, as many customers see it.

And the city car wash is really lame. You pretty much have to wash the car by hand and then run it through the washer, which just sort of rinses it off.
"...we could certainly band together and establish some sort of Consumer Report's-type thing for restaurants."

Great Idea! If we all just got together on this then we could establish some sort of system where people with food safety knowledge could document existing and probable health hazards in restaurants and publish the results on the web and in newspapers! If only big government bureaucracy wasn't standing in the way...
@ 26 - You say "I like cleanliness, too. I would just rather see it handled by consumers and consumer advocates.

Leaving aside for the moment why you DON'T care for government (you've typed a lot of words on that subject already), could you please explain why you think that your 'consumer and consumer advocate' system to ensure restaurant food safety would be, in fact, BETTER than the system we have now?

What expertise would your system bring to bear over that of the existing system?
#37: He's a greedy dumbfuck and he doesn't care if people die, as long as he pays 37 cents less in taxes. That's how tea party morons like him want to make the world "better." I'm sure poor ethnics dying because they don't have access to health certification wikis would put a gigantic grin on his privileged fucking face.
I disagree with Intern on the whole food inspection thing. I do think we need state oversight on that. Consumer powered wikis aren't going to cut it.

However, the entire food workers card thing is a huge racket. I've lived in several states and this is the first I've lived where you are required to get a food worker license. I don't get the purpose of it. Everyone should be trained properly, but if it's done right the first time, why do you have to keep on getting licensed every few years?