Maybe He'll Sacrifice a Virgin Next Time

Comments

1
Jesus is my firefighter.
2
I'm letting all my Texas friends know to do their part.

I also suggest that Sloggers also pray for rain in Texas. Everyone might as well pitch in.

Actually, I'd really like to see some of you write prayer cards that we can all read from on those days. Let's here your best prayers to the great Texan rain bringer!
3
Might as well hire a voodoo doctor. Do people always need to resort to fourth century superstitions? Fercrissakes, it's a weather pattern. Rain will come when it comes. Morons! (no offense to morons)
4
I would gladly give them some of the rain we've had. I spend all my time with the shop-vac in the basement. NOT FUN! Since I'm an atheist, if I pray for more rain, will it stop?
5
Well, undoubtedly, one of the prayers will work and it will be raining again in Texas.
6
can he even find a virgin in texas to sacrifice ?
7
There used to be a tv ad that ran about Texas saying it's a "whole other country". (I think it was for it's tourism agency)

I wish Texas was it's own other country. Then we could see how many weeks it would take to become a third world nation.
8
I also forgot to mention that Gov. Perry asked for federal help. Shouldn't that be lynching talk in Texass?
9
I think the bigger question is:

Why is God pissed off with Texas?

But they never seem to think about it that way, do they?
10
@9 - great!

@8 - Yeah, I feel like this is a great time to call Perry out on his secessionist rhetoric.
11
@9:

Yeah, strange that God is only being wrathful when the natural disaster is hitting one of them "librul blue states". And yet when there's a drought in Texas or tornadoes in the "Bible Belt", somehow "God" and "wrath" never seem to be used to describe the phenomenon.
12
...god throws a BBQ, and Texas prays for rain.
13
So, Texas is on fire? I always thought it was Hell, anyway.
14
The other day, a very religious relative of mine posted a Facebook status praying for lower gas prices. It's amazing how Christers don't think God has anything better to do.
15
fuck you know they are going to pray for their football teams too, we need to counter prayer that shit
16
Well, then obviously Texas won't need that $2.2 billion in emergency relief funds, right?
17
The scary thing is that rain is already forecast for a lot of Texas on Monday. If it actually rains Monday I guarantee you this fucker will take credit for it
18
sheridan said 'if i owned hell and texas, i'd live in hell and rent out texas.'
19
@9- "Why is God mad at Texas?"

Austin, obviously.
20
Texans' main problem has always been that they don't pray enough.
21
God is saying She wants Texas to go Blue or else.
22
Rick Perry is the absolute and hateful symbol - nay, the very avatar - of the reasons this Texan moved away from Texas.
23
We, the people of St. Louis, Missouri, would be happy to donate some of our rain. We've been getting far too much of it.

But hell, if the results are this hilarious, we'll keep it.
24
Dang. Just when my prayers that Texas burns to the ground were going so well.
25
Prayers to Satan are much more effective than prayers to God, who has proved again and again that he doesn't care, whereas we have ample evidence that Satan *does* care! - born in TX in WWII.
26
Excuse me while I get into my jet and seed some clouds over Texas so the rain starts.

SCIENCE!
27
Prayers to Satan are much more effective than prayers to God, who has shown over and over again that He doesn't care, while Satan has much better credentials. - born in Ft Worth in WWII.