Blogs Apr 14, 2013 at 6:00 am

Comments

1
That sounds nasty.
2
Ever???
3
Darn, @1 I was going to say that but then I thought it was too childish. I should have gone for it.
4
@1, @3
I guess it was too obvious, if I thought the same thing, too.

Someone needs to ask Dan Savage for advice about this.
5
This needs context. And Gawd said "The circus is in town and I like the elephants dancing in little skirts. It makes me laugh. But their tent is held up with poles. And the poles have rings where the tent is tied. Don't ever remove the poles from the rings. If you do I will be angry and kill your children and destroy your crops."
6
@5 Here is the context; Yahweh is instructing Moses to build the ark of the covenant. It is to have two rings mounted on each side, and poles of shittim wood are to be inserted through the rings " that the ark may be borne with them."

But I like your version better.
7
@5

I would have thought that God would want you to remove the poles at the RNC.
8
Be ready to move the ark on a moment's notice. You never know when the Nazis will come for it.
9
And keep your fucking eyes closed when you open the thing.
10
Exodus 25:16
Put the lime in the coconut and shake it all up.
11
Indiana Jones, lime in the coconut and dirty jokes? Best bible study ever.
12
God intends the Polish Men's Gymnastics team to have a permanent place in the Olympics.
13
If you take your pole out, suddenly some other schlub will come along and try to jam his pole in there.
14
What the hell is that thing? Some sort of radio for talking to God or something?
15

Lotsa folk rushin' to get a Seattle apartment this morning:

http://images.wsdot.wa.gov/nw/005vc16939…
16
and thus a religion was founded on
here are a bunch of rules I don't care to explain to you, but you should follow forever lest I smite thee.
17
We put the poles in the holes!
18
The Creator is right, shower curtains really are a pain in the ass to put back on.
19
"Caution: Risk of Eye Injury.
Proper eye protection required."
20
I'd like to see the pictographic IKEA instructions.
21
Damn. That God guy sure is a micro-management case.

Gee... I wonder where Joseph Smith got the idea for his Golden Plates?

@20 No, you wouldn't. Although... the little stick-figure guys would look awesome with ritual headgear, beards, and fringes.

22
It's just the LORD foreseeing the sad decline of Eastern European circus tradition.

I blame Austerity.
23
@20: I would love to see IKEA instructions for how to assemble the Tabernacle.
24
"10-15 “First let them make a Chest using acacia wood: make it three and three-quarters feet long and two and one-quarter feet wide and deep. Cover it with a veneer of pure gold inside and out and make a molding of gold all around it. Cast four gold rings and attach them to its four feet, two rings on one side and two rings on the other. Make poles from acacia wood and cover them with a veneer of gold and insert them into the rings on the sides of the Chest for carrying the Chest. The poles are to stay in the rings; they must not be removed." -TheMessage, a biblical paraphrase.

I find it interesting that for some old reason, The Stranger preys so often on the Christian religion and yet accepts Churches to place adds on it's webpage. It's like every week there's something about Christianity (against), Gay and Lesbian rights (for), MMJ (for), I can just about count on it.
I'm starting to question the morals of this publication, since you've shown yourself capable of taking money from groups you're so often bashing and you go out of your way to misrepresent someone just as much as you claim you're being misrepresented, way to be the better person and show us how you would like us to treat you...
25
Ring-a-ding.
26
And whatever you do, don't cross the streams.

Please wait...

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