Comments

1
These people are so nuts this shit doesn't even make sense any more.
2
Roses require constant care and vigilance. Dandelions are really quite robust and will grow on their own.
3
Roses are susceptible to all kinds of fungi.
4
They even managed to get divorce and in vitro on there, assuming that's "Artificial Reproductive Technologies". I'm amazed they missed the gays and feminism.

Apparently pulling out is evil too. You must cum inside her, husband, as God would. Well, He would have if Mary didn't have to be a virgin in order to imply sex itself is basically evil (you should feel bad about that too, by the way).
5
@3, I don't know, they grow wild here. I assume they do in Utah, too. No, not the fancy hybrids, but wild roses are basically weeds around here.
6
I know you'd like to think your shit don't stink
But lean a little bit closer
See that roses really smell like pooo-ooo-oooo
Yeah, roses really smell like pooo-ooo-oooo
7
@3 And bugs. The petals all fall off after the seeds are fertilized, too.

Okay, even if we wanted to accept that these people have certain honestly-held beliefs, yadda, yadda... They don't make it easy. All that stuff around the top of the Roses picture? All that good stuff, like, top-quality care for children, seniors, etc.?

THEY DON'T FUCKING BELIEVE IT. It's complete bullshit. They spend zero, less than zero, effort supporting early nutrition, child development and education. They don't support nursing care for seniors, either. Medicaid is getting slashed, which is what pays for most nursing home care, and what do we hear from these people? Nothing. God's will. No "artificial extension" of life. Die already.

A pox on them. I'd wish a pox on their firstborn, too, but there's no need. Their unfortunate children already have that: their myopic, hateful, self-righteous, evil, selfish, moronic parents.
8
Individualism is the soil that leads to use of contraception.
9
"Fertility appreciation" sounds like code for "Making excuses in advance for failing at Natural Family Planning."
10
This is what I'd expect from people that think dinosaurs lived six thousand years ago, there's no proof for evolution and prayer can replace medicine.
11
So bizarre that dandelions are nature, nurtritious, some believe they have medicinal properties, and because they've been untouched by us and have not experienced manipulation they are closer to what 'God' intended (should you be of that persuasion).

Roses, on the other hand, have been manipulated by man for hundreds of years to suit our asthetic purposes.
12
dandelions are *natural, nutritious --

It's been a long day in Norway here.
13
Nothing says chastity like a big ol' plant dick/pussy. Additionally, it's technically bestiality, since flowers like these use birds and bees to pass pollen from flower to flower. Sick fucking roses.

By the way, notice the logic that if you like to fuck, you must not be good at caring for the elderly or disabled. Oops, no one told that to my promiscuous friend who has worked in health care for the elderly and disabled since just out of high school.
14
"Top quality care for children, elders, disabled persons."

Yeah, if you're wealthy (and see Eli's post this morning for what THAT means). For the middle-middle class or below, plan to be a slave to your quiver full of brats and aging parents. By which we mean, WOMEN plan to be slaves, because caregivers! No socialism for this top quality care.
15
They are against coitus interruptus (i.e. the pull-out) but in favor of natural family planning (i.e. the rhythm method or not banging when you think your female partner is ovulating). I was going to ask how wasting all that sperm on a woman's stomach can be evil, while it is perfectly ok to intentionally waste all that sperm inside a woman who is not ovulating. Then I realized that even a little internal consistency is too much to ask from these people.
16
@15 WAY too much. But you make a good point.
17
Fuck religion
18
Um....I know plenty of people with strong families (marriages of 20+ and 30+ years and counting) who have only 2 or 3 children. Seems to me that they must be using contraception. So what would that look like on this graph? A rose bush with dandelion roots?
19
@11 I came here to say that dandelions are food while roses are not.

Your point is even better.
20
You know, at least they put the morning-after pill under contraception instead of abortion, like their loony friends would have probably liked...
21
I don't understand the connection between "openness to children" and "long, satisfying marriages." Yes, you might feel pressured to stay together "for the kids," but that is hardly a fun time. Conservatives love to pretend that kids ALWAYS make relationships better. Funny, I have spoken to people whose marriages were fine UNTIL they had kids.

Also, pushing that sex is sinful and evil until marriage is just going to create a complex in a newlywed. You've been trained to never even touch each other, and overnight you're supposed to be popping out kids. Yeah, that won't cause anxiety with your new partner-for-LIFE. It's a stunning example of the lack of understanding for the emotional side of sex.
22
I just finished a nice retrospective on Shulasmith Firestone in the New Yorker, which gave a thumbnail of her thesis/rant in the Dialectic of Sex, which amounted to the structural (biological) basis for the exploitation of women...which seems radical, until you see junk like this and then you suddenly see quite clearly the degree to which she was a real Cassandra and not a head-case.
23
Speaking purely from a gardener's perspective here, but the roots on the "healthy rose" look pretty putrid in the diagram. Looks like poor soil, I'd suggest some compost and mycorrhizae. It's interesting that the "contraception" roots are white and healthy, richly interacting with the soil, while the "chastity" roots look dark, neglected and unhealthy.
24
@15 And don't even think about all those conceived babies that God ejects from a woman's womb for every single egg that successfully implants. As many any 80% fail to implant, by some studies. And that doesn't include the 31% that spontaneously miscarry after implantation. God's the worst abortionist in history--no human could ever keep up. Source: http://discovermagazine.com/2004/may/cov…
25
I love that they still think "Just say no" is enough. Without good sex ed, women can't learn to say no and make it stick.
26
If there's anything positive in those two images, it's that they included many different birth control methods under that dandelion, which would hopefully be information someone from an abstinence-only educational system could use to google their options.
27
Apparently abstinence leads to volunteerism. http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FZVvgFCIxXM/TD…
28
@19,

Roses aren't commonly used for food, but they are edible.
29
@28 Rose hips are edible, also make a nutritious tea. Apples and pears are not only in the same family as roses, but you can graft them all on the same tree.
30
What. The. Fuck. I feel like I just touched the void by clicking on that.
31
Somehow contraception leads to abortion here. Some new formulations: protected sex leads to infertility, the morning after pill leads to unplanned pregnancy, and promiscuity leads to homelessness.
32
They always miss the key, crucial point: promiscuity and contraception in early adulthood does not prevent a person settling down, marrying and having kids later. In fact it makes for healthier families, because older parents with fewer children are more financially secure and emotionally mature, and aren't spread thin by the excessive demands of a large family.

If anything, promiscuity followed by settling is a natural pattern, one that humans always reach for whenever they can manage it. But the anti-contraceptive crowd seems to assume that madonna and whore are completely, absolutely, mutually exclusive, sticking to the smelly old misogynist canard that a fallen woman can rise no more.
33
"Sexual Chaos" is the name of my new designer scent. Dibs.
34
Repulsive. This is propaganda aimed at impressionable children. If they really want to promote their points of view, they should explain why they think they're right. That way, the kids will at least be made to think about their sexual choices.
35
Damn! Fundie xtians are even dumber than I thought possible. Freakishly idiotic.
36
Do they really not realize how many unwanted children "marital faithfulness" can produce?! I try to picture the sex lives of these couples and I just can't. I try to picture my passionate marriage without birth control and I can't do that either.
37
@27- Well you have to do something with all that extra energy, and spanking it is also verboten.

Of course, anyone with any experience know that church volunteer organizations for teens are probably the best place to get laid. Even if the other teens aren't that into you, the youth pastor is probably easy.
38
@15 - it's all about the risk... women need to risk pregnancy every time they have sex in order for it to "count." If women are having sex without fear then they're violating some made up "religious" dictate. Well... that and because fertility awareness fails at pretty high rates... folks just not having sex when they think she's not ovulating will end up pregnant sooner rather than later.
39
During pregnancy and while giving birth are the times when women are the most vulenerable and likely to die. Getting pregnant and giving birth is a risk that you take if you want children not somthing you do to make yourself more healthy. That these people think women being pregnant as much as possible is a good thing suggests they have a really sick fetish.

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