This is funny and great too:

http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2013/…

—though the end is locked behind the paywall, these magical lines are not:

Many of the problems I’ve faced during the past forty years have revolved around coördination and spatial skills. I don’t know how close I should be to objects either moving or stationary. Get too close, and I might hurt them. Stay too far, and I will never know their love.

The story of my life, @1.