I get what you're saying Dan and for the most part I agree with you, but I'm pretty sure that's a lamp, not a bell. Other than that detail, I completely agree.

One other thing. Is the sound of sodomy that much different than the sounds of straight sex? I've had my fair share of both and if anything the straight up PIV sex is usually louder and more raucous. If the sound is really a concern then these folks need to really crack down on straight sex when the kids are home. All these straight parents (the ones who still have the energy after taking care of the kids all day) are really traumatizing their kids.

Yeah, I guess that is a kid listening at a bedroom door, isn't it. Yeesh, these anti-gay bigots are just creepy.

But I love "the sounds of sodomy"! That is an album title just *begging* to be used. Anyone in a band? Use that title!

There's separate legislation re: adoption being passed sometime before the equal marriage referendum, and the poster seems to actually be advocating lobbying elected representatives to try to block the passage of that bill.

Most kids don't want to hear their parents have sex. Most parents are pretty darn conscientious about not wanting their kids to hear them having sex. Somehow, most families seem to figure it out (albeit with probably less frequent sex than before the kids).

Cries of dead babies and abused children never raised Irish ire for how many decades?

Was it not a Simon and garfunkel B side?!

dead babies can cry?

Cries of dead babies? You mean, g-g-g-g-g-ghost babies?! Do the rattle tiny plastic toy chains? Chilling.

Check that typo at the end of the first paragraph. By "scarament of marriage", do they mean having a Halloween wedding?

@5: Word.

@2: Simon and Garfunkle, 1965. Classic! My big sister had a copy.

Of course these issues aren't separate or unrelated. Because POPERY!

Fortunately, even the Irish have had their eyes opened. Local catholic churches (in California) are importing their clergy from the Philippines now, the supply of Irish has finally dried up.

@10: "Hello, asshole, my old friend . . ."
My parents had that record.

Some unintentional hilarity worthy of Maggie Gallagher herself. It doesn't quite reach the comic heights of "a storm is coming" but it comes damn close.

"The only way to protect kids from the sounds of sodomy is to lock them in soundproof rooms with enough MREs and bottled water to last them until they're 18."

We do our best by handing out headphones and itunes gift cards. But they've certainly heard some sex noises. Doesn't seem like the end of the world to me.

Oh, dear - now I'm tempted to write a novel around the premise of parents' being legally prohibited from having sex (ever again?); it would be interesting to make the concept of lifestyle choice genuinely viable, but I doubt I'd be able to see it all the way through.

@12: Or maybe the lyric was: "Hello, Blow Job, my old friend . . ."

Remember that friggin' CONDOMS were illegal in Ireland until 1980. It's still a heavily religious country; literally the first person I laid eyes on in the Republic, outside the train station in Dublin, was a very sweet, very prim elderly lady who wanted to sell me a bleeding heart of Jesus pin and tell me about the wages of sin. They don't call the Irish a Godforsaken priest-ridden race for nothing.

Fortunately, I don't think any country in the world has modernized faster than Ireland in the past 25 years. I think these bigots will be crushed in the referendum. They'll get their gay marriage, and their sodomy, and possibly even a bit of rum and the lash, if they want it.

Echoes, in a well, of sodomy....

I always wondered, how do Eskimos do it, when the whole family shares a few seal skins in a single igloo.

@1 kids totally giving a lampjob.

@evolume

Ask an Alaskan.

@8: http://i431.photobucket.com/albums/qq39/…
That's my wife and I as the Ghosts of Christmas Present and Past, and our Baby Marley. We did the whole thing just for the toy chains gag.

"Hello penis my old friend,
I've come to suck on you again,
because a bigot softly creeping,
spilled his seed while we were sleeping,
and the vision that was planted in his brain
still remains
he hears the sound of sodomy

In restless dreams he walks alone
while all around him cocks are blown
and some women get cunnilingus
he turns his head and shouts "outrageous!"
when his eyes are stabbed by the flash of a neon light
that lit the night,
and showed the rounds of sodomy

And in the naked light he saw
ten thousand people maybe more
people sucking without speaking
people licking without procreating
people having anal! anal everywhere!
and no one cared
But for the dumbass of sodomy

"Fools!" said he, "you do not guess!"
"The wages of sin are death!"
"Hear my words that I might teach you!"
"You must not suck and fuck or God will damn you!"
but his words like silent raindrops fell
and echoed in the wells
of sodomy

And the people fucked and played
with every part as they got laid
and the sight flashed out its warning
forming words from all the cumming
and the cum said that orgasms are good for one and all
so heed the call
and then succumb
to sodomy."
-Simon and Grabassle 1964

@Hanoumatoi:
(Clapping)

@22: Well, I'm not going back onstage after that performance. (Clapping)

Also: Stephen Fry is apparently tying the knot sometime soon!
http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-norfo…

@23 & 24: Thanks. I like trying to do song parodies, glad you guys enjoyed.

Woo hoo, Go Cornell!

Hmmm . . . Stephen Fry's fiancé is 30 years younger than him.

Hello Everyone here i am Lucy by name and i just want to share with you on how i was help by Dr Gboco Email: gbocotemple@yahoo.com after all i have been through trying to get back my relationship with my husband i lost so much money and i did not get the result that i was looking for i cry all day and night because my husband ask me out of his life after our 3years marriage so a friend of mine in my office told me about much about Dr Gboco on how he help her with the job that she is now and how powerful the Dr Gboco is so i contacted him for help and ask me what need his gods to help me with i told him and he also told me to do some prayers which i did and after 1day i received a call from my husband asking me forgiveness i was so so surprise it was all like a dream as everything happen just the way Dr Gboco told me it was going to happen and now we are both together again and he even show me more love than even before.....thanks to you Dr Gboco.

Sounds of Sodomy is my Butthole Surfers cover band name.

Ms Cute - Your maths are improving. Also in that range, I believe Mr Maupin's husband is 27 years his junior.

I had a friend once (now about 37 or so) who was quite close to Mr Fry for some time, and even admitted to trying to detach him from a long-term partner. My friend attributed his failure to being too young.

@Hanoumatoi, wow.

my favorite line: anal everywhere! And no one cared.

Mr. Ven: Well, it's easy to be correct when it's a nice clean multiple of ten.

My father just yelled at me for buying a six-pack of bottled water (the colossal expense of $3--my $3--was too hard for him to bear graciously), when I'd said I wanted to stay in the store 4 minutes longer to buy "a bottle of water." He said, "I thought you said a bottle of water. This is six." And I, trying to be Zen Master Nocutename, and diffuse the tension, said "Well, Dad, you know I've always been bad at math."

I guess who am I to stand in judgement of true love? Who knows? Not only Armistead Maupin, but also Christopher Isherwood and Don Bachardy had happy long-term relationships with significant age differences.

@19- Based on having watched "The Fast Runner" it seems tradition Alaskan natives attempt to bang their brother's wife quietly while sharing a very small hut, leading to have to run naked over ice flows.