We Will Be Covering BOTH Republican Debates Tomorrow, Because We Love Democracy (and Hate Ourselves)


I'm half tempted to watch for the lulz, but I'm afraid I might stab myself in the forehead with a fork out of frustration, or dislocate and eye doing eye rolls.

So thanks for volunteering to sit through the whole painful/hilarious thing. Better you than me. I'll wait for the 5 minute gag reel on the intertubes later. If any of them says anything incredibly stupid (an inevitability, I suppose), it will be all over the internet with minutes, thus saving me from having to watch the entire thing.
It's a 'bowl' system where, clearly, a debate-off would be appropriate.

Someone draw-up the brackets; I got Walker making it to the final-four.

Gilmore sounds not terrible, at least as far as Republicans go: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jim_Gilmor…

Which, of course, means he'll never poll out of the low single digits. Eh.
Is this really the best possible field of candidates? Can anyone not be aware that this list of men contains nobody but sociopaths, psychopaths and assholes? Is this really the world we live in? Jeezis this is depressing.
Crap that's bad, you have to listen to the rethuglicans, that's horrible, my only advice would be to drink, drink heavily, preferably tequila.
Just watch it, sans sophomoric pre-debate propaganda, keep an open mind, and vote accordingly. The more our citizenry and culture acts like grown-ups (which means ditching the race card among other "cards") the better our political choices will be - maybe not for 2016 but in the future. It's all our fault - that goes for asses and elephants.
@6 LOL, such a peabrain.
I'm looking forward to Trump calling Jeb! a baby killer all through the night. And trust me you KNOW he's going to do it!!
@7: Thank you for illustrating my point.
I'm curious @6 - in your opinion, which of the Republican candidates is acting most like a grown up? Professional clown Donald Trump? Moral scold Rick Santorum? Bacon makin' Ted Cruz? 'Cause what I see is embarrassing immaturity from wall to wall.
@10: probz Kasich, the "Old School Republican". repukes are pointing at him to prove they're not all detached from economic reality.

Either Kasich, Bush, Walker, or Rubio (or a combination of two of them) will be it. They all beat or tie her in important battleground state polls.
@9 thanks for pretending you're a reasonable person.
@6, Post-Citizens United, candidates can stay afloat as long as they have one or two large-scale donors in their pocket, while the Fox News 24-hour outrage cycle gives candidates the false sense that the pathway to victory is paved with crass and offensive soundbites, because the GOP base isn't the least bit interested in what any grown-ups have to say.

This means the entire GOP field can (and will) alienate voters for months on end with no financial repercussions. By the time the general election comes up, the GOP candidate will be irrevocably damaged by this pathetic spectacle, and the Democratic nominee will sail to victory. It's not the healthiest or most productive way to win, but as a non-Republican I can't seem to find a single fuck to give.
@14: You know, I really don't have a rebuttal for that except that it is not just FOX but also Twitter et. al., and that the current GOP is like you say but the need and desire for a party on the right side of the spectrum is by no means obsolete.
@15, I agree we would all be better served by a non-dysfunctional right-wing party, a spirited debate over important issues, and a legitimate choice between two serious candidates, but I can't help but savor the irony of Republicans getting bitten in the ass by the system they rigged for themselves.
I'm just going to wait to hear Jon Stewart's description.

Oh, wait.

@6 most of the sophomoric pre-debate propaganda is coming from the current front-runner of the Republican pack. You're welcome.
@10 - At this point, it would be Jeb!
Let's see, there are 17 republican possibles and 6? Democrats. Trump will step on his necktie, jeb will will miss the important stuff like immigration and abortion because of stupidity, which leaves Hillary and ?
@17: Oh God damn it. You're right. Trevor Noah couldn't ask for an easier event for his first show though.
@18: The most horrifying reality is that the sophomoric Donald Trump is echoing the sophomoric popular culture. I dare say that the late and great William F. Buckley would concur.
@13: That's the most endearing thing you've ever said to me. I'll fix a martini on that note.
@20: There is a very long, long, long, way between now and November 1, 2016. Enough time to make it home.
Fox should had done an American Idol thing with this. Make it a reality show that the public gets to vote who gets booted.

Trump has turned this debate into his new reality show.