"Chum" might not be the best word to use in close relation to eating out a pussy full of semen.

"Help me get over an issue that merely requires me getting over the issue"

And I say that as a snowballing fan.

Thank you for calling out the STI testing shenanigans, Dan. There's this nasty misconception going around that if people get tested every so often they can bareback all they want. That doesn't hold up unless testing happens every time you have a new partner or that person has a new partner or that new partner has a new partner. Is this what happens when you don't teach sex ed properly in schools or is it part of a more general dumbing down? Hard to say.

Snatch-22, perfect Dan.
Yes LW, like Dur, you not noticed this before? Happens to us women as well, except often we have to soldier on past our release, as the other guy comes.

@1 I love you and your bad word play 😀

Dan, I thank you for being a champion for respectful treatment of all hook up partners. I think a lot of thirds get turned off by being treated as a sex toy a couple takes off the shelf from time to time, I know I did!

Yeah, you can't be sure someone doesn't have HIV unless you test, everyone is monogamous or celebrate, and then you test again 3-6 months later. One time testing tells you that the sex you had 3-6 months ago plus didn't infect you. Your last several months of sex aren't included.

Also, lots of people talk dirty or fantasize about stuff they don't actually do. Nothing wrong or weird about that.

The best way LW is to fuck for a while and then go down on her. Compromise I know. There still will be sufficient juices to satisfy some of your fantasy.
Some people have real problems, you know.

It does happen to women as well.

Haven't tried this yet, but want to. Jerk off quickly onto her breasts or pussy. If you do it fast, you won't be as physically tired and won't shut off completely. Then you can suck and lick and get her off during your hopefully short refractory period, before fucking some more.

This letter has been posted before, and I think I remember someone sharing their approach, which is to freeze their cum and then defrost it before the session ready to be spread around and eaten with a lot more enthusiasm prior to orgasm! That sounded pretty practical to me.

@9 Yeah, it's definitely not the case that all women remain aroused after orgasm or are capable of multiple orgasms or whatever, as is rumoured in some places. For me, being fucked after an orgasm can be a nice physical sensation, but all dirty thoughts seem to evaporate from my head immediately after orgasm, and I definitely have a rebound period.

I wonder if there are any studies about the physiology of that.

@10 has good advice.

@5, 9, 12: "It does happen to women as well."

Huh. For the women this happens to, is it every time, or only sometimes?

@14:

In my experience, women can be divided into those who enjoy multiple orgasms, and those who are one-and-done, and while it varies from person to person, it does not seem to vary from session to session.

@14 - One and done for me, every single time. Motivation gone, mindset gone, and most physical sensations turn unpleasant, sometimes painful. Pretty annoying, since my partner outlasts me.

I'm curious, Mircea@16, how long does that unpleasant period last after orgasm? Could you switch to blowing your guy for 5 or 6 minutes while you cool down and then restart the festivities? Worked for me & my lady in a similar situation.

DonnyKlicious@17, no idea, really. I think it might work in theory, if my guy could keep his hands to himself for that period of time. But he's a handsy type and sorta loses enthusiasm if he can't touch me. Even non-sexual touch is an annoyance to me during that overly sensitive refractionary period - bearable, but I can't get back in the mood with it going on.

DonnyKlicious@17. Oh, that didn't answer your question. 5 minutes or so is about right, I guess - I can do multiples when masturbating. I also think it has to do with arousal levels. The higher the arousal, the harder the comedown. Masturbation is usually pretty low-key for me.

Mircea, making love for me is all about what I can do to make my partner feel good. I wouldn't dream of intentionally doing something uncomfortable or annoying to her, and I'd hope she'd tell me if I was. Everybody responds differently to different stimuli, so good communication is the key to good sex. I listen very closely when she says, "I like it when you do it that way" or "I don't particularly care for that" and file it away in my "Sportsman's Guide to Fucking Amy". Some guys can be a little obtuse, so ya gotta be very clear. Then if he STILL doesn't get it and make adjustments, you'll have to decide if you're tolerating a clueless lover or a deliberate asshole.

Happily tolerating. :) I try to accommodate the way he happens to be built, he tries to accommodate the way I happen to be built, I guide him to ways he can still touch me after I'm done, and he understands that the time to make things last longer is before I come.

If you're happy, I'm happy. :)
Wouldn't mind being able to have multiple orgasms, myself though, even if they are low-key.
Sigh.

@14 For me, it depends. Sometimes after I come I am simply disgusted with the idea of anything sexual. Sometimes I'm not disgusted, just not interested and just want to snuggle. Sometimes I don't really care. I've never had the scenario where I come and want to keep having sex, though. Even if I'm still kinda horny I'll want a small break first.

I'm sure it varies from one person to the next. I've even known guys who just kept going and would come more than once without needing any pause. Some even stayed hard the whole time. I don't think needing/wanting a break is unusual at all, though. It's just kind of understood that if you're a woman having sex with a man, if you come first you wait until he finishes even if it's not good for you anymore, and if he comes first the sex ends even if you're pretty close and wouldn't mind going on a bit longer. Of course it's a double standard, but it's one that's so well established most people don't really ever question it.

Thank you so much for the reminder that BBC is slang for an appendage and not a proper way to address a person. As the white female half of an "in the lifestyle" interracial couple, I can not count the possible wild nights of carnal fun we ended up declining because of the way a few people see nothing more than his dick.