Cut to me enjoying this review.

Dear Paul Constant,

Love is not a strong enough word for how I feel about you. You are the best ever.

Love,
Jocelyn

P.S. Did you know that one time I bought Pride & Prejudice & Zombies and then the next day I read that you hated it so I returned it without even opening it? I am your sheep.

Mr. Constant, you are brilliant.

I am the features editor for a college newspaper and decided to take up the challenge of doing a review of "Tell All." Being an idiot, I kept pushing off reading it till the last possible minute and was reading until 5 a.m. Monday night. After getting some sleep and dwelling on the book I just felt completely bitter. I was just pissed off at the book as I wrote my review. Later on I thought, "maybe I was just being bitter and maybe it was actually a decent book..." However, the more I thought about it, the more I thought about how terrible it was.

Your review confirmed everything I thought. I want to thank you for not being a Palahniuk sheep and just giving it praise because it has his name on it.

I'm not sure what your policy is on this and feel free to delete my comment if needed, but here is my review. I would love to see what you think.

http://www.thefalcononline.com/article.p…

Thank you for your honesty. You are my champion of the day.

Sincerely,
Dusty Effin Henry

For whatever it's worth, Chuck's last novel was better than the several that preceded it. (Which is to say that Pygmy was the best since Choke.)

Am I gonna buy and read Tell-All? Sure. But then I never claimed to learn my lessons.

Sometimes I feel the same way about the books of Martin Amis.

@2: "P.S. Did you know that one time I bought Pride & Prejudice & Zombies and then the next day I read that you hated it so I returned it without even opening it? I am your sheep."

Hee! You are adorable.

I bought the book. I'm looking forward to reading it. But I won't deny that Palahniuk's style is mockable and the reason he can churn out a book a year is because he has a formula and sticks to it.

This review will be the best thing I have read all day, including however much of 'Tell All' I can get to.
But I'm still excited to read the book.

jealous?You're jealous.No Homer, we all got the same chairs..psst, here's the REAL number for 911.Lenny whispers - it's 912.

Here's the thing: Chuck Palahniuk writes beach books for nihilists (or closet nihilists, or weekend nihilists, or would-be nihilists, or meta-nihilists, or not-really-nihilists who just like the word). That's both the supreme compliment and the supreme insult. You can only do so much de Sade, Dostoevsky, or Nietzsche; you can only spend so much time arguing that the neo-gnostic pantheism of Bruno and Blake is de facto nihilism. You can read the manifestos that defined futurism and surrealism and situationism 'til you're blue in the face, but the truth is, sometimes a brooding misanthrope--particularly one with a self-effacing sense of humor--needs something to read on the plane/bus/lakeside.