Okay- for the childless 39, I like to go above and beyond (naively I know) to give others the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she uses NuvaRing? The patch? Norplant? A diaphragm (I use mine faithfully)? Depo? Many bc options aren't specifically visible. Don't know the woman and I totally see the red flags, but just sayin'...

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@2- yeah, she could be using a method that doesn't leave obvious signs, but the problem remains- this guy is a dumbass if he's sleeping with a woman without protection and hasn't even asked her if she's on birth control (or what kind- she's his girlfriend, he ought to know what the failure risks are etc. of whatever she's using), or if she's been tested for STIs. I mean, really? I use the insert (awesome! don't have to think about it for 5 years, it's more effective than the pill, and I can't forget to take it!), but my boyfriend and I still discussed it before and after I got it so he would know the chances of becoming an accidental father or needing to choose.