Columns Sep 3, 2009 at 4:00 am

Sorority Girls


Dear Dan,
I watched you on MSNBC - interviewed by Keith Olbermann. You were awesome! Just one suggestion - when you said that the Democrats should "man up" - in the future would you perhaps consider another way of exprssing that thought, or at least say "man up and woman up" - there are a lot of women like me, who are active in the Democratic party - and telling us to "man up" is a bit sexist.
Thanks - Keep up the great work!
Why was there nothing in the last response about the abuse of exclamation points and question marks?

I really wanted Dan to say, "You're a freak - not for your tame bits of kink, but because you have no clue how to punctuate. Chill out."
ahhh... a liberating article for all types of women. thanks Dan you're the best. "Goo" Girl Rocks... keep your Man interested
GIRL, find another circle of friends.

I don't want to be a jerk, but people who get offended by people saying "man up" really make liberals in general look like a bunch of wussies.

Man up already. Or woman up. But, come on.

As a girl with 1.5" stretched ear lobes, I would say that I kind of doubt anyone would let you fuck their lobes, simply because it would not be good for the tissue. The chance of tearing, infection, etc, is WAAAY too high.

If we've spent years slowly and carefully stretching our lobes, there are not going to be many (I would never say never) of us who would let you fuck them up just to get your rocks off.

Also, with my size lobes (pretty big) I can only get about 3 small fingers through my lobes comfortably. You'd have to find someone with much bigger lobes or you'd better have a pretty small dick.
GOO, there is nothing gay about a guy eating or tasting his own come, especially when the release involves a woman. Especially, when it's post facial, then its hot, at least that's the consensus amongst my girls.
For the empty sacs who are too timid or PC (Pathetically Correct) to say "man up!", how about you just say "grow a pair" instead.

A pair could be testicles or ovaries. Your choice...


Hetero men eating cum is just not typical. Not their own, and not somebody else's. That is really pushing a boundary for the hetero guy.

If I had to draw an equivalent, I would say eating cum for the hetero man is like a guy peeing in a woman's mouth for the woman. These are sexual practices that simply will garner more resistance, I suspect because to each gender the aforementioned sexual acts are (often) deemed more degrading.

I'm sure somebody will insist I am wrong, and yeah, I know, there are exceptions to these rules, but consider this: sexual practices are all normative. If not for these norms, a kiss on the cheek would be the social equivalent of cumming in a woman's mouth.

I think it is fairly obvious that a hetero man eating cum is simply more taboo than a woman accepting anal sex. This is only to say that GOO's husband should try to negotiate for more, perhaps for some ass to mouth action.
Dan, you are the one fomenting hatred, portraying we conservative christians as hostile. Glenn Beck and Rush continually advocate common sense solutions to problems in government and society, and if you would truly listen to them I think you would find yourself alligned with them in many of their viewpoints.

It's a singular delight to get to thank an athiest for mentioning some actual Christianity on television, as you did on the Olberman interview! There's very little Christianity to be viewed in the media these days, which pains me greatly. So, thanks very much indeed!

Could you kindly suggest where one might share a brief essay on why Jesus would not tell us we can't afford to tend the sick, and why Christianity does not teach us that health insurance reform is really a government plot to euthanize the weak and destroy America? Between the Bachmans and Bishops of the Roman Catholic Church of late, some of us who seek to follow Christ are in very real pain, and would find it downright medicinal to get this message out.

Is there some secular forum where - in spite of the static of lies and lunatics presently in posession of megaphones - where there's a chance that some word might be heard explaining why the Christian Right is, well...neither?

In any event, good work on the Countdown interview!

The Rev. Laina Wood Casillas
Dan, can we get a lesbian themed column? Pretty please? Lots of hot dykey action and some freaky typical savage love drama. Thanks!!
Dear # 13,
If Glenn Beck and Rush are really into providing "common sense solutions to problems", then maybe they should put it to a good use by advising GOO.

Can we PLEASE get straight guys to end this myth that they are raging fuckmonsters who want to have sex always and if they ever turn it down it's because the woman has something seriously, seriously wrong with her? Because pretty much every straight woman I know has been turned down by a boyfriend with a low(er) sex drive and, while it's fine, different strokes and whatever, people still feel the need to perpetuate this myth. It's not doing anyone any good -- women who feel like freak sluts for wanting sex more than their boyfriends or husbands and guys who'd rather play videogames than screw.
@17 - I am a straight man and your argument totally does not hold water. You have some issues I think with your own sexuality if the vitriol of your writing is any indication.

Eating ones own cum is not pushing any boundaries farther than asking a woman to take it up the ass who had never done so before.

Your idea of norms has gotten really twisted and you might want to talk to someone about that, because I am sening some pent up homo hormones within you.
@4 for the win! That letter was SO hard to seemed like a teenager wrote it.
Opps - looks like things got re-ordered... My comment is now directed at @12.
Come on, hetero men eating a little cum is NOT atypical. Have you ever gone down on a girl after you've finished? As a kid, didn't you ever taste your own cum just to see what it was like? Maybe most straight guys aren't willing to admit to these things, but most of us have done them, just like many (most?) to-be-straight guys experimented at least a little with another boy when they were really young.
I saw your interview on MSNBC, you are flat wrong about what is happening, Yes, religion is involved, not your thing, cool. Not one of the religious institutions I work with condones violence of any type. Perhaps you need to read, or watch Glenn Beck, no one will refute what he says, I know, me and my company do research to ascertain what the truth is before we rebroadcast it, (for a cell service company). Our clients want the truth, and we give it to them, the problem is the more I learn about this Administration, the more I get confused and concerned, btw, have you tried to read the health care bill? Prime example of this, it can only be described as the intentional misinformation put out by the Democrats. Oh and going on Olbermann, you do realize Jeffery Immelt is on the White House economic advisory panel, has now been named to the Federal Reserve Bank of New York, and has his hand in all the socialist causes, not to mention assisting in getting the former head of the AFL/CIO of New York named as President of the same Fed.
I guess what I am trying to say is, you have a right to your opinion, When Prop 8 passed in California; I saw more hate and intimidation in those few weeks from the stop 8 crowd, than from the Tea Party members in the last 4 months. Tolerance is a two way street.
So Sayeth the Impaler!
On the cum-eating debate, I will side with those who say it's OK for GOO to ask her husband to eat his own come in exchange for anal sex -- note that, despite its popularity among hetero guys, anal sex is actually more difficult and potentially painful than eating semen. And like everything one tries because it pleases one's partner, the kick you get out of turning them on pays off royally. GOO's husband should just imagine how hot she will look while she's looking at him eating his semen. Remember: your pleasure, my pleasure, our pleasures...
I hope GOO's husband will agree. And then that both of them will think about where to go from there. Happy kinky fun!
GIRL is a man, not a woman. Having a so-called "sex-change operation" will not make him a woman. It will make him a mutilated, hormone-addled man. "Sex change" is a fraud. If GIRL is confused about his gender, that is a mental problem, not a physical one.
Dan, I was so pleased to hear your “somebody had to say it” comment on Olbermann tonight. Many of us have been pitching a fit about it for months, and now the secret message has been revealed to all.

Ever since Palin was carefully scrutinized, vetted and then coronated VP candidate by the McCain Campaign braintrust, we have been continually visited with comments (sometimes sutble, sometimes—as with Palin—not) veiled messages to the GOP nutball core of “You know, sometimes a president just gets killed in office, we don’t know how it really happens. Just one of those things. You know, you’re mad at the president because he’s going to kill your grandma and Sarah Palins little baby, you got a gun or whatever lying around, and it just-happens.”

If you and Olbermann didn’t prearrange his pullback after your comment, who cares (besides perhaps your booking agent, that is)? You’ve pointed out the turd in the punchbowl, plopped it right in the middle of the plate of murderous hors d’overs being served by the treasonous right, and now the discussion of what nobody wanted to discuss may begin.

Better yet, you’ve stuck your chin out and given us cover to launch the attack by referencing your comment! All I can say is what a guy! better you than me! and watch your back!

Truly, it is a relief to have someone who will push Olbermann occasionally beyond his comfort zone, especially on serious matters such as covert entreaties for assassination of a sitting president. Call me “old-fashioned,” but I really was raised to follow a basic code of ethics called “The Ten Commandments,” and we all know what the first one is.

For over 2 decades I’ve been the one in the real world and internet ethers I frequent, who delivered the turd-punchbowl commentary, and suffered the flak from the pantywaist circle-jerk liberals who seem to populate the majority of discussion outlets.

Now I can reply to liberals who cringe in horror when I point out the simple little turd right there for everyone to see, “No, I’ve not ‘gone too far yet again.’ Dan Savage, who was on [CHOIR SINGS] Keith Olbermann last night, agrees with me.”

Do you send out alerts to followers before your turd-punchbowl commentaries? If so, please add me to list. I would not want to miss any of them.
Mr. Cayce:

I'm a woman and I agree with your comment about politically correct objections to "man-up," but for a different reason.

As an aggressive, goal-oriented woman, I frequently find myself using comments like "balls to the wall." Obviously, being a woman, I don't have balls of any kind, let alone any I could take to the wall.

But, truly, how would "ovaries to the wall" sound? Incredibly stupid and certainly not as strong as "balls to the wall."

You don't hear comments about someone's courage as them having "ovaries the size of oranges," do you?

So all of the anatomical references of courage, strength, assertiveness or aggressiveness are male.

The way I see it, until women get respect for their own reproductive organs in common and tacky vernacular, I'm stuck with using the male references.
Dan goes on TV with weird streaky lighting/ make up issue that makes him look he's a college kid playing someone's dad in a musical. Which-- he looked like a kid pretending to be his own age-- so that's good?

Dan does his, "Look how OUTRAGEOUS I'm being shtick." Check out the sparkle in his eye just before he goes over the line even Keith Olbermann (!) won't cross.

The kinds of journalists who go to school don't bring up the possibility of assassination until there is something that has to be reported because it is universally seen as likely to encourage bloodshed.
God damn, what kind of poor repressed housewife are you, GOO? It's called cum or semen, and a guy who's never tasted his own jizz is lying, a virgin, or the biggest prude this side of the Atlantic.

1) The comment was not "ALL religious groups," so you create a strawman argument (logical fallacy) by arguing that the groups you work for don't advocate violence.

2) How well do you know the groups you work for? There are some groups that serve as launderers for other groups. So your group "XYZ Power" may not advocate violence but if they shuttle money to the "WHN And How" group that does advocate violence, XYZ Power may, indeed, be financing advocation of violence.

3) Most entreaties for violence are not overt, but covert. It is done with a series of not-even-subliminal comments and lies which lead the more gullible folks to be slowly convinced that an action they believe is wrong is actually kind of right or not so bad that doing it wouldn't be so wrong.

4) Many groups are actually a complex web of power and financial sharing. Groups like the Scaife foundations have in the past funded Free Congress Foundation which was involved in covert support of death squads in RENAMO and Operation Condor in Argentina, as well as many other CIA-related efforts to overthrow governments that were not willing to give away the country's resources to U.S. corporations, then the installation of a leader who would support U.S. corporations' plunder of the nation's resources. So Scaife can say he never funded support of death squads, but in fact he really did because his funding both provided the original funding for the launch of the FCF (as well as the Heritage Foundation) and was their major contributor for years.

5) Ever heard of Pat Robertson's "Operation Blessing"? It was part of his church ministry, supposedly planes fitted as medical support resource for countries in need of help. It was actually used for Robertson's exploitation of diamond mines in Zaire and in support of CIA covert efforts (…). Robertson was given the rights to the mines shortly after Mugabe (with the aid of the CIA, which also supported Mugabe’s death squads) overthrew the Ian Smith regime. The Ian Smith regime was no icon of freedom, but it was a model of democracy, prosperity and peace when compared to what Mugabe has visted on Zaire as president. Robertson even appeared in public with Mugabe, knighting Mugabe with credibility by Robertson using his cloak of Christianity and his role as (at least at that time) not only being the leader of one of the largest Christian ministries in the U.S., but also a man who could walk up to Capitol Hill and gain access to many GOP politicians. If you follow OB’s history, you will find it was active almost always in areas where the CIA was involved in overthrowing a government.

I spent over 10 years doing research on the religious right. I am quite aware of what some religious PACs have done in the name of Jesus Christ.

Dan Savage was correct when he said that groups in the religious right have produced an actual decrease in the number of people who will even say they are Christian and who will admit they go to a Christian Church. That is the fault of both the filth on the religious right that participated or supported these heinous deeds AND of every Christian church in our nation who knew that these political groups using the banner of Christianity was doing in the name of Jesus and remained silent, letting the Pat Robertsons continue their fraud of their supporters and continue to use Christ’s name when assisting the CIA back murderous death squads like Mugabe’s.
P.S. to Impaler:

Are you aware what Rick Warren (Saddleback Church) is doing in Christ's name in Africa? Here's a tip: it will make anything Pat Robertson ever did look as pure as the driven snow, AND it is setting up Africa for an outbreak of disastrous proportions of any communicable disease that gains a toe-hold there.
@17; no, it's not fine. Those woman with fine, healthy libidos should drop those lame asses and hook up with someone else who isn't getting enough. And then the low libidos will fall in together. Once we get that all sorted out peace and happiness will reign.
@24 (Warsaw)

Your gender politics and opinions are all well and good, but you sound to me like you're leveling the sort of hatred at GIRL (and by extension all transgendered and transsexual people) that speaks of putting your beliefs above other people's lives and sanity. I disagree very, very strongly with your statements.
Um, spare us your political rants, all of you. (look left, look right) If I wanted to hear about Olberman or some such, I would be at Drudge.

Not every website comment section has to turn into the "Tastes Great! Less Filling!" scream fest you guys seek.
Its not about libido ,it`s about taking care of a partners needs.People who only have sex when they feel like it are selfish and manipulative.I know because I lived with one such person for fifteen years .In the future I won`t put up with a person like that,not even for fifteen seconds...BRADLEY
Gaudior, there is no hatred at all (certainly not on my part). This is not a question of beliefs, but facts versus delusions. A man who thinks he is "really a woman inside" is deluded. He is not a woman. Mutilating him and stuffing him with hormones will not make him a woman. I may think I am the King of France, and you may even call me Majesty, but France is still a republic.

In your response to GIRL you seem to forget that straight (or lesbian) and transgender are not mutually exclusive! There are lots of straight and lesbian trans women.

And when you say the "normal" part of GIRL's life, did you mean the part where she pretends to be a man, or what?

I know your schitck is to be an asshole, but your ultimate goal here to is to educate right? I know it's probably really easy to just copy and paste your answers--but try changing them up a little bit next time.
Haven't most guys tasted their own cum before? I thought it was pretty standard for most guys to taste what they expected their sexual partners to suck out of their cock at least once.

Now I could see some straight guys not wanted to admit that they had tried it because it might sound kind of gay but it just seems like curiosity would get the best of most of them. Not to say they blew a load into a cup and savored it but at least suck their finger in the mess on them and gave it a quick taste.
Dan, by all means, keep saying "man up".
When a faggot squeaks it out we just roll in the floor laughing.
@ 26: Hey, AmazonRed, "C*nt To the Front!" sounds pretty agressive (not to say "ballsy")--how about using that? Best wishes.
The Rev. Laina Wood Casillas,

Check out this blog post on healthcare as a moral issue:…

I don't know if Bishop John Shelby Spong has written anything on the healthcare debate, but you might want to check out his writings, too.
Impaler: You are a dumbass. Saying there was "more hate and intimidation" from the Stop Prop 8 crowd is ridiculous.

Many of us - especially those of us whose marriages were being voted on like a bad "The Bachelor" episode were ANGRY as hell but the only thing most of us hate is the hate spewed by lunatics like you who can't wrap your simple minds around the fact that when other people try to legislate what you do based on their own narrow views, you offend and upset people - people who should be able to focus their energies on helping our country instead of finding people to pick on and harrass.

And if you didn't see the hateful stuff that preceded the election last November, your head must have been in the sand. Or in your ass.
Straight dudes shouldn't be afraid of their own juices. If my man cums on me, he isn't afraid to get it all over himself too, or to kiss it or taste it in my mouth. He doesn't stop and make a boundry of wherever on my body has cum on it. He just resumes, and it makes me feel loved and sexy, not "eww, go take a shower right away". It's not like he goes out of his way to eat it up, but it's nice we can enjoy eachother, and with whatever happend to be upon us.
As a "cum-junkie" myself, when I have asked my partners to eat their own "goo", I have never encountered any resistence. Maybe because I am sooo enthusiastic they are curious? Maybe since I have tasted myslef on my lover's penises after sex, and expressed how much I love it they are more willing to taste themselves on my tongue?
Maybe it's all about the approach....mmmmm.. yummy results regardless!!!!
Jesus is happy when we take care of the sick.

He is not happy when we confiscate our neighbors income at gunpoint to spend on causes we pick as worthy.
Government healthcare is not an act of Christian love or "charity".
It is passing the buck on caring for your neighbor to the government.
Way to go Dan! Seems like everyone I talk to thinks that you gave the best 10 minutes of television they've seen in a long time. Way to put out!
St. Pius, I can't even imagine what it feels like to be so selfish.

Well christians aren't doing their job taking of people and I sure don't want to sit around waiting for some christian neighbor to come take care of me.

Why would christians support the profit making healthcare system in place today? Does refusing care to cancer patients to make a buck make jesus happy?
Amazonred @26

"balls to the wall" has nothing to do with testicles.

It's an aviation term. The throttle levers on old WWII airplanes had big red balls on the ends of them, to make them different from flap handles and landing gear levers. To make the plane go faster, you shove the throttles toward the instrument panel. To go all out, max thrust, you push the throttles all the way forward - "balls to the wall".
@32 To be trans is to feel that the gender you were assigned at birth does not match up with an inherent, natural sense of yourself as something other than that gender. Why is this concept so outrageous and threatening, why does it need to indicate something diseased? Why do you think you're an expert?

The problem with protesting this hard and this angrily, of course, is that people automatically assume that you're up late at night watching trans lady porn. And there's nothing wrong with that, of course, those performers need people to buy their video content...

I think you are reading too much negativity into Dan's answer to GIRL. He is saying go find a supportive group who explicitly cares about your transition and can give advice, not find support/advice from the women you have regular associations with.
Rev. Laina Wood Casillas, if you really want to get your message out, you're going to have to invest as much in media and public relations as your competing Christians.
I'm a little surprised in this day and age that people think a hetero man eating his own come is a big deal. It just ain't just ain't. And while anal sex isn't a big deal either it's much more difficult, requires much more preparation and is potentially much more painful than eating one's own come. Personally I think GOO is letting her hubby off easy. She should make him eat his come several times before she gives up her ass. And yeah, I'm a hetero guy who will eat his own come without a second thought and fucks his hot wife in the ass all the time.
and I'm sure those MEN flying, fighting and who died in WW2 were not making dick jokes (# 48.)
Ladies its just a term of endearment, no one doubts your importance
Hey 44,

It's very fun and melodramatic to say the President is going to "confiscate our neighbors income at gunpoint", but the correct way of saying it would be "taxes". I know that's a dirty word for you, but it's completely legitimate.

By the way, did you complain and cry about how upset Jesus would be when Dubya confiscated my income at gunpoint to spend on a cause he thought was worthy, namely killing hundreds of thousands of innocent Iraqis??

You need to go back and read your Bible, because if you don't think Jesus believed in caring for the sick, you're crazy.

Finally, Jesus view on taxation: "Give unto Caesar what is Caesar's. Give unto God what is God's." Translated from Amish-speak, he's saying pay your taxes.

And 53, I absolutely think the guys in WWII were making dick jokes. They were men, not saints. Have you ever been around a group of guys in the teens and 20's who did NOT make dick jokes?
"Jesus is happy when we take care of the sick.
He is not happy when we confiscate our neighbors income at gunpoint to spend on causes we pick as worthy."

Listen, this is true. Jesus actually said, "Consider the lillies of the field. They toil not, neither do they payeth taxes, and they doubly not payeth for healthcare taxes, especially when the recipient may be some random Mexican." John 3:19-20, I'm serious.

Actually wait. He didn't say that. And more to the point, who cares, he was just a guy that died 2000 years ago, and the imaginary sky Gods offer us nothing of value when it comes to debating ethics or government policies.
Lucky for us the Constitution protects us from being taxed to implement your personal religious views.
Man eating his own come is not so weird. Remember eating snot when you were little? Well the only reason you didn't eat come when you were 3 was that you didn't have any. It's a matter of timing.
Assumedly the husband has kissed her after coming in her mouth, so it's not like he hasn't tasted it already. Every time I kiss my boyfriend with a mouth full of his cum, I ask, "So, are you gay now?" He says, "not yet." So apparently it takes a while to turn the man gay. Just saying.

@#12--you have a way more interesting sex life than I do. If I follow your logic . . .it is a normal everyday activity for a man to come in a woman's mouth. Therefore, a woman sharing that cum with the man is a little odd. So . . . it is a normal, everyday act for a man to pee into his own mouth. Therefore, the man sharing that pee with a woman is also a little odd, in your world. Did I get that right? And, if so, is that why you sound so pissy?
@12 flawless logic, I would love to hear you truly justify this. Women are expected to eat cum regularly, it's not bad for you. Urine on the other hand is not healthy to drink.

Why is it okay for a girl to do so, and not a man? It's not going to do them one bit of harm. I see it as no different than asking you to eat something distasteful, which is EXACTLY what it is. Truth is, you don't even know if it tastes bad if you have never tried it. Some like it, some don't, some like peas, some don't.

#24 Warsaw, define man and woman.
Chromosomes are not an accurate measure, neither are the sex organs themselves. Nature gets a lot of things wrong. There many, many who walk among you who are not 100% correct male or female. Your view of human anatomy is extremely narrow and ignorant.
That last letter! It had a lot!!! of exclamation points!!!!!!!!!!!
Warsaw, you need to get your facts straight.

Thousands of infants are born with intersex (male and female) characteristics; society quickly sorts them almost immediately through surgery, but that doesn't stop from many individuals having ambiguous sexual identities. You choose to ridicule these people, describing them as possessing mental disorders. They very well may have significant psychological issues stemming from their identity crisis, but that's based on a physiological reality that society has systemically ignored & marginalized throughout history.
I would suggest to goo girl that she find some other fantasy of hers that her hubby would be willing to fulfill, rather than forcing him to do something he really doesn't want to do. There's pushing boundaries, and then there's extortion.
To flawless logic : are you serious?
Peeing is NO equivalent to cum... most girls have cum in their mouth while they're still virgins even... and plenty of guys kiss them afterward, maybe not deeply, maybe with a wince, but cum is the most commonly mouthed bodily fluid after saliva.
Whereas pee-in-mouth is NOT a "norm" of sexual play ... it is squarely in the fetish zone (or extreme emergency wilderness hydration/medicine).
Don't egrandize your squeamishness rationalizations as if it's "Logic". You have the right to your tastes and dis-tastes... but I've kissed plenty of hetro guys after going down on them, and they were plenty men about it, and plenty hetro.
For Goo, have him cum in you and eat it out of you. Trust me this really isn't all that gross. If he doesn't have a problem eating you that is, and if he does then you have an whole different set of issues. Mostly it is going to taste like a combo of you both and this might get him over the freaking out. It isn't like you asked to peg him. Which I have actually set as the trade off for anal in one case.

Now for the actual anal. It isn't that bad, go slow, don't tense up, use lots of lube, and remember pain = stop, and try again in a few days. Might I suggest small toys to start as not all people are able to take a dick up there ass with out training. Just be willing to try again if it hurts. Because my guess is if you have been married this long and haven't tried it there is a reason even if it is just mental. I am a girl and I rather enjoy getting fucked up the ass. Good luck...
I'd like to know what women find hot about seeing a man eat his own sperm. If you have some insight into that, I'd like to know.

As for resistance to eating one's own sperm, I think the husband's resistance may come from the fear that if he does it in front of his wife, he'll be perceived by her as less of a man/attractive.
AmazonRed - fuck off with your over-educated PC bullshit. Fuckwits like you actually make me think the Republicans aren't that bad.
to HWSH: I have already seen at least one picture of a dick through someone's stretched lobe-hole.
Warsaw, your comment was funny, but I think not quite accurate. A small but significant percentage of newborns have a mismatch between external genitalia, internal sex organs, and hormone profiles, so for these babies, gender is ambiguous and perhaps not at all immutable and absolute.
"A small but significant percentage of newborns have a mismatch between external genitalia, internal sex organs, and hormone profiles, so for these babies, gender is ambiguous and perhaps not at all immutable and absolute."

Yes, but that explanation overlaps poorly with observed trans behavior. Show me something that says a substantial fraction of transexuals actually have anatomic or hormonal intersex features. Trust me, if people could tell who they were there would be a LOT less controversy over the issue. Most are normal anatomic males with plenty of testosterone--I've met a bunch having sex or on viagra they only needed after estrogens and spironolactone took the edge off their boners (medical settings only).

Hetero men eating cum may not be normative sex, but a girl getting a cock up her ass isn't normative sex either, so yeah, still fair trade.
Goo- you are my hero. Your husband wants you that badly after 17 years of marriage? I think I'm going to have to show my husband this week's column and commenters. Good for you and good for him. Dan was right- definitely freakin hot.
Here's your dyke column from Dan: pussies are icky, lesbians are uncool and full of drama, but Dan will "man up" and admit that there are some hot buch firefighter dykes that he would *theoretically* fuck. Also, some of his best friends are dykes.

Anything more insightful or empathetic about lesbians from Dan would be an f-ing miracle...
Here's your dyke column from Dan: pussies are icky, lesbians are uncool and full of drama, but Dan will "man up" and admit that there are some hot buch firefighter dykes that he would *theoretically* fuck. Also, some of his best friends are dykes.

Anything more insightful or empathetic about lesbians from Dan would be an f-ing miracle...
My guess is that GOO's husband believes she'll enjoy anal sex as much as he will - but on the other hand, GOO doesn't think her husband will enjoy eating his own jism. Why would you want your partner to do something he finds repulsive?! Why not pick a never-fulfilled fantasy that he might actually enjoy? Or is the fact that he'll hate doing it precisely the thing that turns you on? If that's the case, then yeah - you're a freak.
Eating cum...? Lick. Swallow. Done in one second. Big deal! C'mon, monkeys, just do it. Better than whining. Slurp, done!
Did the last writer say that she told her daughters about her husband's desires? ("My girls tell me I must be trying to make him gay.") Hopefully her daughters are grown women and they all talk about sex anyway, so this isn't way over the line.

I say ew. Ew ew ew.
@44 (St Pius) Gee, I sure hope your poor neighbor without health insurance gets ALS (Lou Gherig's Disease) so you can spend the rest of his life being his caregiver, buying all the equipment he needs to survive, emptying his urine bag, pureeing his food, changing his cath, and giving him suppositories so his bowels move.

Yeah, that's what we all would prefer: self-righteous Xtians offering us charity so they can get a higher seat next to Jayzus.

Why do I bet money you aren't engaged in a single charitable act beyond dropping some change in an occasional box? I bet you send more money to the NRA and the GOP though.

BTW, why do I also bet you considered the Iraq war a "necessary cause" worth spending your neighbor's income on?

You are so blind you must have had somebody else type your comment.
Dear Goo,
I praise you for sticking to your guns and making him taste his own goo, I think I will have to take that apporoach too!
I really am amazed that Dan din't comment on the ridiculous amount of exclamation points in that last did come off as a teenager writing it. And "goo"...are you effing kidding me?!!
To "SLUT":

ALL men get bored of having sex with their female partners (wives/girlfriends/etc) after about 9-12 months (tops). Blame it on biology. Males are biologically "wired" to have sex with as many partners as possible, in order to spread our genetic material as far and wide as possible.

I don't know one healthy man who could honestly say they are still excited about having sex with their female partners after about 12 months. Yeah, we'll have sex with you, and we'll even enjoy it, but it's not like it's hot anymore for us. It's not that you aren't sexy, it's just that it gets boring to keep humping the same chick all the time. And the guys that DO think it's still sexy and hot? They're just saying that. Trust me.

Why else do you think a guy would rather play a video game than have sex with you? (Because the game is actually a challenge).

If you really need men to f**k you in order to feel sexy, you might want to consider non-monogamous relationships. Seriously. And if you really think you did your man wrong by "cheating", I won't even go into how us men deal with the frustration and boredom that comes from regular monogamous sex. Don't feel bad about cheating. It's one of the few ways to keep monogamy interesting (until you turn 50 and you don't care about being "sexy" anymore).
You would lose those bets.
Conservatives as a group are much more generous givers than liberals.
I'm a gay guy; I tried tasting my own come once & hated it (it reminded me of week-old borscht) & I've never done it again. But then I'm also a gay guy who refuses to engage in anal sex, which apparently many str8 guys do engage in, so figure that one out.

The confusion continues!

And btw, does anyone really believe that Dan reads these posts? Je ne le pense pas.
You are a complete idiot who who runs a cheap savage love column and you pair up well with a MTV V-Jay such as Olbermann. To washed up journalist who will never be taken seriously and leave no legacy. People like you come and go. And your ratings on MSNBC should give you a clue.
ROGO @13 you aren't the only one who has noticed the the common association, however errant, between Christianity and hardline fundamentalism. Much of this is thanks to those who were given the spotlight, and access to the administration during the Bush era. Such groups acted as if their reign would never end, and it could be some time before Christians or conservatives are trusted again in the US.

Of course, the vocal extremist minority who still has access to the mic continues to speak for the prosecution in this regard, as do the angry internet militants who wish Hellfire upon all who disagree with them. They, like Jack Chick's tracts, have almost become self satirizing. But it isn't Dan's fault this has happened.

As a teenager, I was flexible enough to autofellate (NSFW), and, indeed, this was, for a while, my primary method of masturbation. (And no, I'm not as endowed as Ron Jeremy, I was just really bendy then. Think Short Bus) Consequentially, I've never been bothered by the taste or texture of my ejaculate (though there's an icky aftertaste when I'd swallow). I guess the lack of curiosity amongst other het guys is somewhat surprising.

Sadly, I'm analphobic, or copraphobic, but either way am silly scared of santorum, so I won't be anally penetrating or being anally penetrated for the foreseeable future.
Re GOO; it took 17 years of marriage before EITHER practice was adopted?! ouch...
Come is very nutritious. Just like dairy products it can be a vector for disease, but not necessarily if the donor is healthy.

You don't see people saying ick about breast milk, yet the mother must have her health-- same for come.
way too much information
@76: Her girlfriends. Not her girl-children. Dur.

@84: yawn

@85: Ever heard of an enema? Anything that slides out of me post coital is lickably clean.

@87: Come isn't "very nutritious;" there's just enough sugars to fuel sperm to an egg. If there was lots of good stuff in it, teenage boys all over would be malnourished parting with it 5 times a day.
@26 Said:
"So all of the anatomical references of courage, strength, assertiveness or aggressiveness are male.

"The way I see it, until women get respect for their own reproductive organs in common and tacky vernacular, I'm stuck with using the male references."

This is what I say:

"Wow, that woman sure has clit."
Impaler (#22) I hope you never run into a guy like the reverend (sic) Stephen Anderson whose "I Hate Obama and I Pray He Dies" diatribe has made it to the media (Google his name and Baptist to find him) but he is not alone. I have met people like him all across the continent. I hope the peaceable Christians "man up" and make them take the back seat again. Otherwise we'll have pogroms and ethnic cleansing in the US of A.
Not all straight women are narrow. I have had a couple of transgender friends and I was happy to help them with the process of learning to look and act more like a real woman. I can only speak from my own perceptive of course, not for all women, but sure I would answer those questions. Why not?

"Girl" needs better friends, people who will accept her and go with her on the journey. Transgender support group definitely the way to go, but a good pal, of any sexuality would still accept and help her out anyway.

Gender isn't always about what's between your legs. My male cat is looking like a "girl" down there too, but that doesn't mean he's any less a boy because he had to have surgery. In his head he's a Tom, period, and for the record a complete lack of genitals hasn't stopped him from courting a lady cat or two. He got around his disability in a way I can't discuss here and which you probably wouldn't believe if I told you anyway, laugh, but my point is he's still a BOY where it counts, in his head.

Girl is a girl where it counts, in the head. But being raised as a girl "she" may have a few problems adjusting to behaving like one. Questions to ask. Who is she going to ask if not other women? Other transsexuals who may or may not be able to help answer the questions honestly?

Finding a hetero gal friend who won't judge, who will help probably won't be easy outside a trans-gender group. More likely than not she'll end up talking with a relative of someone met in the group before she'll ever end up talking to pals at work or whatever. But telling her to bug off where the straight women in her life already are concerned isn't very helpful. She may very well find a kinder soul who will accept her and answer her questions from a straight female perspective. You never know. But hey you don't ask, you don't get. You know?
That thing about having sex with a spacer-ed ear lobe? It's not really having sex with a hole; more like with a rubber band. Sounds unsatisfying to me.
FYI -…

"The series is described as a buddy cop drama. Jack is an ambitious, by-the-book cop who is partnered with with Dan Savage, a drunken, lecherous, wild-card cop who only hangs onto his job because of a heroic act many years prior. Amazingly, crimes still get solved."

I know, people don't own their names, but still....

sometimes shutting @88 if I were to assume all anonymous comments with snarky siglines come from you (which I do, even when you appear to argue with yourself), then I reckon you have no business deciding what is or is not appropriate for disclosure, i.e. what is TMI. Get one of your registered friends to concurr, and I'll consider it.

Were I talking about copraphagic tendencies, I might agree with you, just to spare our readers their breakfasts.
95 Your Friends Would Like To Tell You
AmazonRed (@26, I think) I know what you mean about all 'tough' vernacular expressions being male-genital-centric. Well, how about:

'I wouldn't like to see what's coming outta her womb...'?



'She's got Labia of Lead....'?

Come on, Savage Love readers, we must be able to come up with some more female centric tough-talk...
OK, U-boy;
since you asked-
self sucking and anal phobias are way way TMI

you filthy animal
95 (by way of 98)

Tried to tell you...
SLUT's question rang a bell for me.

A couple years ago, my colleague was going through depression, and his therapist gave him some advice which sounded a little—oh—familiar with what SLUT said: Because he wasn't feeling 'wanted' by his spouse, he should try and make his own 'happiness'—that feeling of being 'wanted'—a priority; finding it however and wherever it might present itself.

This advice—crudely administered—led my colleague into a Prozac prescription, having an affair, divorcing his new spouse, going through hell with his young and immature new lover, and finally, after two suicide attempts and a very rocky period with his employer, a life with another lover two thirds his age.

The experience left him noticeably altered—not entirely for the better, to be honest. There's a cloud of sadness around him where there used to be energetic and earnest vivacity. Who am I to know if he's happier? I hope he feels 'wanted' now, but I can't help thinking:

Is this sort of advice common among licensed therapists? Did SLUT get the same advice my colleague received when she (presumably) sought council during her depression? Is there such thing as a Therapists' Party Line?
Sockpuppet Obama, Snarky Idjit @96, 98, 99 ad nauseum, I assume by inferring your belief that I should be humiliated by the particulars of my sexuality that you also believe that the details of anyone's sexuality should also be humiliating?

It would make sense. Some time ago you were accusing me of Pygmalionism. But I would think on Savage Love, nothing in the sexual arena is taboo.

Are you still in middle school?

You've got issues, dude.

Not that that's technically a bad thing; we all have issues. Some things might humiliate me, were they to be made public, but my history of autofellatio and the exit-only status of my rectum aren't among them.

You, in the meantime, seem to be struggling to keep your own Freudian slip from blowing right off.

Good luck with that.
could you repeat that?
not anyone, you're special.
but, hey, you're right-
this is slog: share away...

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