MONDAY, MAY 3 This week of diabolical villains, apologetic racists, and illicitly lifted luggage kicks off at a motel on Seattle's Aurora Avenue North, where late this morning a tenant alerted management to the overpowering odor emanating from unit 11. Shortly after noon, the manager of the 19-unit Way West Motel discovered the source of the smell: a man and a woman, seated on a love seat and a chair, respectively, both dead. "I knew right away," said Way West manager Chris Pierce to the Seattle Times. "The smell was awful." Police investigators soon arrived and declared the scene a likely murder-suicide, with the man apparently shooting the woman before killing himself; a gun was recovered at the scene. As for the dead: Any and all clues come from Way West manager Pierce, who lived two doors down from the couple, whom he described to the Times as a woman in her 30s and a man in his 40s who'd lived at the motel for three months without incident. "They didn't cause any problems," Pierce said of the couple. "They never even slammed their door."

Meanwhile on Capitol Hill, a 91-year-old woman was walking along Harvard Avenue East this afternoon when she was hit and fatally injured by a car, whose allegedly impaired driver attempted to flee the scene before being apprehended by police and arrested on suspicion of vehicular manslaughter. More on the alleged killer later in the week; for now, attention must be paid to Marie Bush Fite, who was born in Seattle in 1919 and lived here her whole life, and who most certainly deserved a better end.

TUESDAY, MAY 4 In less depressing news, the week continues with the ridiculous scandal that exploded around George Rekers, the Baptist minister who spent decades distinguishing himself as one of the world's foremost homophobes—cofounding the gay-hating Family Research Council, pledging allegiance to the evil "gay cure" quackery of the National Association for Research & Therapy of Homosexuality, earning tens of thousands of dollars testifying in support of state bans on gay adoption—before being photographed last month returning from a European vacation with a professional male escort. Details come from the Miami New Times, which today published the photo of Rekers and his rent boy along with a wealth of follow-up facts, and which deserves the world's eternal thanks for exposing the heartbreaking farce that is the life of George Rekers, an old-school closet case who devotes his workdays to making life exponentially worse for out gay Americans and spends his vacations being massaged by a twentysomething twink with a "smooth, sweet, tight ass" and "perfectly built 8 inch cock (uncut)." These physical specifics come from the profile of Rekers's traveling companion, a lithe 20-year-old whom Rekers will claim to have brought along to Europe as a sort of prescription valet. "I had surgery," Rekers will tell the New Times, "and I can't lift luggage. That's why I hired him." In addition to lifting luggage, the professional gay escort was expected to submit to ministering. "I have spent much time as a mental health professional and as a Christian minister helping and lovingly caring for people identifying themselves as 'gay,'" Rekers will respond to the New Times. "Like John the Baptist and Jesus, I have a loving Christian ministry to homosexuals and prostitutes in which I share the Good News of Jesus Christ with them (see I Corinthians 6:8–11)... If you talk with my travel assistant that the story called 'Lucien,' you will find I spent a great deal of time sharing scientific information on the desirability of abandoning homosexual intercourse, and I shared the Gospel of Jesus Christ with him in great detail." Later this week, the New Times will talk to "Lucien," who'll describe how Rekers "liked to be rubbed down there." Thank you, Miami New Times, and best of luck to whoever's saddled with the George Rekers suicide watch.

WEDNESDAY, MAY 5 Today brings an update to a heartbreaking story reported in last week's Last Days, in which an Edgewood man advertised a diamond ring for sale on Craigslist and ended up murdered by intruders in front of his family. By today, three of the alleged intruder/murderers—identified by KOMO as 20-year-old Joshua Reese, 22-year-old Kiyoshi Higashi, and 21-year-old Amanda Knight—will be in police custody and charged with first-degree murder (as well as first-degree robbery and second-degree assault). Tomorrow will bring the arrest of the fourth alleged participant—23-year-old Clabon Berniard, who'll also face first-degree murder and robbery charges. As KOMO reports, charging papers will include testimony that one of the participants said the deadly robbery "wasn't supposed to go that way"—a claim that inspired no pity in Pierce County Sheriff spokesman Ed Troyer. "These people are heinous," Troyer proclaimed at a press conference. "We're thrilled to be able to charge every single one of them."

THURSDAY, MAY 6 Speaking of awful people, the week continues with the promised follow-up on Monday's alleged vehicular manslaughterer. Perhaps you've been wondering, "What kind of person allegedly backs over a 91-year-old woman and leaves her to die in the street?" Today brings a remarkably thorough answer from "The man who police say backed into a 91-year-old woman and killed her Monday is a repeat DUI offender, felon, and child rapist who previously failed to register as a convicted sex offender." As the P-I reports, 34-year-old Shawn Wayne Shipp was convicted of child rape in 1991, busted for drug delivery in 1996, and failed to register as a sex offender in both 2004 and 2006. Today brought new charges of vehicular homicide and driving with a suspended license, for which Mr. Shipp is being held on $500,000 bail.

FRIDAY, MAY 7 Nothing happened today, unless you count the lamentable saga of Shandy Cobane, the Seattle Police Department detective who today offered a tearful apology for stomping an innocent bystander while threatening to "beat the fucking Mexican piss out of you, homey"—or maybe it was a tearful apology for being caught on video stomping an innocent bystander while threatening to "beat the fucking Mexican piss out of you, homey." Whatever the case, you can read up on the whole twisty, Arizona-scented saga—including the Seattle Police Department's failure to address the incident until footage of the beating made the evening news—on page 11.

SATURDAY, MAY 8 Today brings an update in the only story that matters—the Deepwater Horizon oil spill, wherein 210,000 gallons of crude oil continues to be pumped into the Gulf of Mexico every fucking day. This week brought a major effort at containment, as BP began the process of lowering a massive containment dome over the still-spewing well. Unfortunately for all, today the containment-dome plan went splat, as "ice-like hydrate crystals formed when gas combined with water blocked the top of the dome and made the dome buoyant," as CNN reports. Follow-up options include attempting to place a smaller chamber over the leak and plugging the gushing oil pipe by shooting garbage into it. Hurricane season 2010 begins June 1. Stay tuned.

SUNDAY, MAY 9 Nothing happened today, unless you count a gloriously sunny Seattle day that happened to coincide with Mother's Day, which is plenty.

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