Columns Aug 17, 2011 at 4:00 am

www.humpseattle.com

Comments

111
Defining "rick" as a verb meaning "to remove santorum orally" seems like it might make the term "rick santorum" redundant. Maybe it should be "to clean up a bodily fluid orally". Just saying..
112
SOLE

Some great ways to let your BF know you're GGG about his fetish next time you see him is to dress up.

First, keeping your feet nicely groomed, manicured without using yucky tasting stuff and keeping the smelling nice says, very clearly, that you want him to enjoy your feet.

Stockings come in knee and ankle length as well as thigh. They can look really sexy on nice feet, and the shorter length makes them more comfortable if you're a man with hairy legs than thigh-high ones.

Wear slip-on shoes when you go out to dinner. It's easy to slip a foot out from the shoe under the table and run your naked or bestockinged foot up his calf. Sexy, too.

Finally, be proactive in your GGG here. You know he likes feet, to make a point of putting your toes up to his lips for sucking, rather than waiting for him to grab them himself. If he's sucking the toes of one foot, caress his face or chest with the other.

Once you make it clear that you're ready and willing to make his fetish dreams a reality, he'll be more likely to get comfortable with opening up more.
113
Oh the law of unintended consequences...Googleads is giving me a link to "Donate to Rick Santorum's Campaign" in the right column...hilarious.
114
From the archive page, you can't actually click through to this week's column since it's a link to humpseattle.com. So, after this week, it will be really tough for people to read this.
116
@24, there's nothing wrong with going by Richard, but it's really hard to get people to change what they call you almost 40 years into your existence. And, you know, it'll take a bit of training to get me to call him something other than "Rick" (in general, and in bed), since I've been calling him that for several years. Go by what you want, but changing it is hard...
117
@108: In general, it's pretty poop-free if you've recently pooped and taken a shower. Cleaning the anus with your finger in the shower (insert it just a little) helps a lot and is neither unnecessary nor harmful. Just don't use soap or anything cause it can irritate the mucous membranes.
119
Dan gave good advice. SPD needs to find a tactful way to have this embarrassing conversation. This sort of thing can ruin a career. Here in Canada we have the Lori Douglas case... a judge who is in a whole lotta trouble over pictures of her that were posted. http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/manitoba/s…
120
@118: Baby wipes. They should be standard in every bathroom. Or at least wet the toilet paper. I seriously do not understand how people can wipe with dry toilet paper.

In theory washing before any sex would be ideal but in practice it means taking a few minutes and dealing with the annoyance of getting wet and drying off every single time, right when you are horniest and most need to bang. That'd be way too many showers.
121
@118/120 In this it is crucial to know your partner.

Many people are committed to hygiene and insist on that extra effort to be totally clean.

Other people see those people as uptight, and not so fun in bed. What's the line? "Sex isn't dirty, unless you're doing it right."
123
Never can keep up, can you, Hunter? I thought stalkers were good at details.
125
fuckwit.
126
Hunter, you sound like you totally have a thing for Erica - why not just let it go? The Erica & Hunter show, now on Slog.
128
Why not define rick as something that can be done to any bodily fluid, not just santorum? People could still rick santorum, but they could also rick semen, rick vaginal fluid, rick urine, et cetera...more opportunities to embarrass poor Rick.
129
Hold the phone.
Erica writes the COLUMN now?
130
Dan:
You're giving far too much attention to Mr. Santorum. You should save some of your/our re-naming ammunition for the other whack jobs on the Republican right wing ... like Michele Bachmann and her husband who just might be in the closet. What can we do with their names?

131
@Hunter: Anal is fantastic after 10-15 minutes of intense ass stimulation (spanking, scratching, caning). I've said that often enough. Conversely, I hate being anally assaulted, no prep, no lube (like two NSA guys did to me last year). Is that so hard to keep straight?
132
Don't mean to suggest SL readers should know my sexual preferences. But Hunter (@122/124) was acting as if he knew, but getting it all backassward.
133
I would never want to remove Santorum orally, but I would like to have him removed permanently. I'd like to SHOUT him out like the stain that he is, or make him VANISH, or wash out with the TIDE so we could ALL - CHEER.
136
@135 - one guy shoved it in "accidentally," when he slipped out of the other hole; the other guy blew past my hard limit during a D/s scene. I call the second one rape, though I didn't report it. Thanks for your concern; I'm okay, just moved from the short-term ("sex with strangers!") plan to the longer-term ("get to know them by dating first") plan.
138
Hunter (or others), if you want to talk to me, you can write me directly at EricaPSavage on gmail.
140
@15: for the WIN!

Rickety-rick! Don't rick Rick!!!
141
I've had to write the email that SPD had to write and it went something like this:

***

Hey Dearest Friend,

So I was getting my kink on scrolling CL and I saw your pictures up. If the pictures are up with your consent then let me say, you look fantastic. But if they aren't up with your consent or knowledge, I thought you should know. If someone found my pics on the internet I'd like to know, no matter how good I looked.

Love,

Dearest Friend

****

In this case it was CL, it was another site, but the pics were up with her permission and all it did was give me a reason to buy her a drink and forget all about it. Had she not known, she told me over that drink, she would have much rather I find it than anyone else.

So there you go and fwiw.
142
Rinsing out the rectum with a few bulbs of tap water is a pleasurable end in itself. Beyond that, your mileage may vary as to the amount of fecal matter hanging about inside you. Some people don't have the luxury of producing movements that are so cohesive that nothing is left behind. I like the term "toothpaste" used above. I'm thankful every day for the invention of flushable wet wipes.
143
testing
144
Haven't a clue why one would even bother with Rick Santorum. My dog has a better chance of getting the GOP nod than Santorum - hell, he couldn't even draw a crowd if they was giving away $100 bills. The man is an idiot and not worthy of the time it takes to even google his name. I say leaving him alone is the best way to deal with him - he's such a media whore that the lack of attention might finally make him shut up and go away.
145
We Michiganders also appreciate that it applies to our governor!
146
This 'Rick' thing will also work out for Rick Perry, the nutjob closet case governor of Texas. :)
147
How many ricks of santorum could Rick Santorum Rick, if Rick Santoum could Rick ricks??

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