Columns Mar 7, 2012 at 4:00 am

Don't Make Me Fuck Your Sister

Comments

1
Why don't you tell your wife instead of us you silly person?
2
Clearly you are a dirt bag. Or is it douche bag? Dirty douche bag? I think the problem is obvious: Too fucking much COCAINE and MALT LIQUOR. Get help.
4
@3 - SISTERS no less! And they are both SMOKIN' HOT! Nothin' like lesbo incest action! Er, that is, after too fucking much COCAINE and MALT LIQUOR. And a little crank to add to the edge...
5
Go for it!!
6
Dude, it COULD just be your breath, y'know. Hit the mouthwash!
7
Wow, what an asshole. If your wife has detailed, juicy stories she's telling about your sex life it sounds like you're getting laid, so what's your problem?

You just want to bang someone new. How fucking unique you are. But right, it's partly your wife's fault for not being an exciting new conquest anymore.

And seriously, it's probably your breath. Older guys often have shit breath.
8
Fuck her sister. For god's sake, man, fuck her sister!
9
you know what would show em? show em all?..........

FUCK YOUR BROTHER IN LAW!!!!!

booyaa.
10
i just realzed that your wife's sister's husband probably isn't your brother in law.
regardless, fucking that guy would still show em.
then, if they have any pets, you could fuck them too.
11
This is so much better than the church-etiquette bullshit in the last IA.
12
That's it - I've been pushed over the edge. I'm now completely convinced that life alone with my cat is preferable to taking a chance and ending up with a sleazeball like this.
13
Asshole, plain and simple. All relationships go through periods lacking passion idiot. It doesn't give you the right to be a CPOS, especially with her sister. Grow up, at least your wife is still fucking you and enjoying it. One fucking kiss which lack passion makes you want to cheat, you should get out now because you clearly are a shitty person.
14
This has to be fake, right? How can this guy not realize what a pathetic creep he is? His wife doesn't deserve an anonymous rant, she deserves a fucking Saint of the Year award for agreeing to live with - let alone fuck - this godawful, self absorbed jackass in the first place.
15
but he is larger Virginia?!?!
16
The big truth here is that that frigid bitch is pushing him into an affair, so it's her fault, not his, if he decides to fuck around. I must say, that's a novel rationalization.
18
What's six inches long and isn't gonna get sucked tonight? Whitney Houston's crack pipe.

What's three inches long and isn't gonna get sucked again ever? Look down, bro.
19
What kind of delusional, self-aggrandizing CPOS man would blame his wife for his thoughts? This type of projection is common among insecure, noncommittal bastards that marry because they think they should, and cheat because they think it's fair.

What about a little communication? This is your WIFE, you should be able to talk about ANYTHING with her. Not getting the level of passion you want? Shit, there's a book or a class or a therapy for that. if you're mutually monogamous, fucking her sister is cruel. I secretly hope you do ruin the marriage now so at least your wife can move on to someone who loves her back.
20
"Leave no stone unturned" is what gramps told me on his deathbed.
21
Matthew was too quick with the logic. We needed to toy with this douche.

Sex life "used to" be good...but now you get 3 seconds at New Years?

She was probably just puffing to her sister in order to convince herself that she didn't make a mistake marrying you.
22
"That's it - I've been pushed over the edge. I'm now completely convinced that life alone with my cat is preferable to taking a chance and ending up with a sleazeball like this. "

This is one of the, simultaneously, funniest and saddest comments I've read in a long time.
23
I can't even get a kiss or even a peck on NYE, and I'm not bad for an old guy! Countcher blessings, fool. And...sorry to your wife.

24
A visit to the bathroom for a quickie and then go back and give your wife a 3 second kiss with pussy all over your mouth.
25
That whole IA is hot. Hot hot hot. I know what I'll be thinking about as I get down with DH tonight!
26
@25 You're going to imagine your husband is fantasizing about your sister? That would definitely kill my lady boner.
27
@ 18 is the funny.
28
You married the wrong sister. Tough titties.
29
@1 nailed it. tell your wife the same thing you wrote. though perhaps make anonymous the person your lusting after. no need to create tension between the sisters.
30
@1 nailed it. tell your wife the same thing you wrote. though perhaps make anonymous the person your lusting after. no need to create tension between the sisters.
31
oh god! i meant you're not your.
32
maybe it was 3 seconds because you were looking at her sister douche nozzle
33
Yeah, your poor wife needs to know what a shit head you are. You should tell her so she can get the hell away from you. Any sister who would screw her sister's husband or ex husband is a piece of shit too. If you're so damn kinky take out an ad on lustlab, don't go screw your wife's sister, shithead.

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