GG

Anon, why do you still have contact with this person?

Yeah, the post-script is some unadulterated IA gold.

Yet another in a long list of look at me, I'm passive-aggressive IAs. Don't you have something better to do than talking to this person? Perhaps some stairmaster time?

Why are you taking the time to trash someone with clear and obvious mental disorders and control issues, which led to alcoholism and anorexia?

Maybe help her get some mental help for her problems and she'd be more pleasant to be around. Or stop spending time with her at all, if you have no actual personal entanglement.

Either way, you sound super oblivious and self-centered to not realize that she's trashing her self-image, not you.

Sounds like the gluten-free vegan freak who told me that hot dogs are poison. While smoking a cigarette.

@6, what makes you think she would accept any help? Most crazy people refuse to admit they aren't anything but 100% mentally healthy and everyone else is crazy. If she wanted to get proper help from a counselor or medical doctor, she would have already gone. You can't talk a nutcase into getting help if the nutcase won't admit they have a problem. It's not I Anon's job to be her shrink if the woman won't go to one on her own. I agree she should stop talking to her - cut off all contact with the nutcase. Crazy can be contagious in the sense that dealing with a crazy person can make you crazy.

Tell it sister!

Heres an idea. Maybe if you battled your weight a little more instead of demons, you wouldn't have to worry about your weight or take what people say personally

Dieting in America is like being a junkie and living in a pharmacy

@13, great metaphor! Hilarious but sad because it's so true.

So your brother got away from this shallow person, but you're still hanging around her and taking her abuse. Why?

More jogging, less passive-aggressive bullshit and I'll believe you're a person of value and substance. You do realize those words describe a person who can exercise discipline, and self control?

Why can't people see my inner beauty through my 500 pounds of hambeast land whale? Because inner beauty is about setting and achieving goals.

I have to admit, this IA makes me glad. One of my dearest and oldest buddies is extremely overweight (and is 6'4")... in our office, people often remark "so and so is HUGE!... they make you look small!," like it doesn't make him squirm inside. I want to punch these people in the face. Sure it's great to be on a healthy path of exercise and decent diet, but not everyone finds it as easy to get on that track.

Fat pigs are always looking for justification of their hideous condition. Fat people are disgusting, and if they don't like how society looks at them, than maybe they ought to put down the fork.

This person's diatribe has the clear smell of jealousy.

Put. Down. The. Fork.

@18 How bout setting and achieving the goal of being a decent person? So far you're failing.

There are food deserts in the US where it is very difficult for some people to eat healthily easily. That being said, Seattle is not one of those places.

YOU MEAN IF I EAT LESS I WON'T BE SO FAT? THANK YOU INTERNET! YOUR CONCERN FOR MY HEALTH AND SAFETY IS ENTIRELY WELCOME AND APPRECIATED. KEEP IT UP BECAUSE YOU ARE MY DOCTOR, APPARENTLY.

DTMF already! Geesh.

Hey fatty! Less time bitching about other people and more time on the treadmill. Chop chop!!

My God - Cate Blanchett would play such a character so well.

And, #26, you're a peach.

Wow. Does every shamer of the ballardwallymont variety not realize how quickly and completely they are making the OP's point? Guess what, shamers: being an ignorant fuckwad douchebag is a choice-and you'll always be a bigger scourge and an uglier addition to any community than I will ever be, fat or not.

How about exercising some healthy self control and learn not to be such a self-righteous, judgemental cunt?

To the fat shamers: being a healthy weight is not directly correlated with diet and excercise. I am regular to very underweight, never exercise, and eat smothered cheese fries like they are going out of style. I have a friend who works out 3 times a week, walks every day, and would probably end up gaining several pounds a week eating half of what I do. Metabolism, body frame, genetics, and occasionally illnesses can make it very hard for someone to lose weight. Not that I believe I can convince you; honestly I think you shame in part to pat yourself on the back and give yourself credit for what was essentially genetic good luck, and in part because you are small-minded, nasty individuals who pick on the overweight because they are one of the last groups it is "ok" to target.

@6 & co.: So what if she has a mental disorder. That does not give her the right to attack and insult other people. It also doesn't mean that her victim needs to take it upon herself to help her. Even the mentally ill can be jerks, and it would be unfair ti them to pretend that the words that come out of their mouths do not affect otbers emotionally. Would it be nice if IA could get her some help? Yes. But that is something over and above IAs social duty to this woman. It would be praiseworthy if she did, but it is not fault-worthy if she does not. I don't even think that IA should, really; IA needs to worry about her own mental health first and foremost. She does not need to hang around poison, even if it is not poison's fault that it is poisonous.

30 sez - "Metabolism, body frame, genetics, and occasionally illnesses can make it very hard for someone to lose weight."

@30 - Sure. But mostly it's the 7 double cheeseburgers every day.

The great thing about people who make a plan and stick with it is they are on the treadmill at one of those gyms before and after work instead of annoying those of us eating and drinking or trolling internet forums.

Ok, ballard. Then explain why I am seriously underweight despite eating 2 orders of cheese fries everyday, never exercising, and living on coca-cola? If it is simply a matter of calories and exercise, I should be roughly spherical.

But you can pretend that they are just weak willed and constantly stuffing their face. I am sure that that makes you feel like less of the horrible person you are for shaming people about things that are none of your damn business. Besides, everyone needs someone to feel superior to, and I am sure you can't feel superior about anything else, certainly not your brains or your personality. Definitely not your value as a decent human being.

So, lack of tolerance and acceptance is bad in me, but ok in you? My shaming = bad, your shaming = good?

You've written multiple paragraphs to my few lines, accusing me of things that appear nowhere in those few lines. Get a grip and a mental health evaluation gemini.

Fatty/ food addicted /heavy pain body writes an I.A. full of judgement to rationalize eating more food. Whatever get you thru the next binge sister.

Fat's a choice not an uncontrollable condition.

@ 37, not for everyone.

@9: You are as bad as the abusive fat-shamer in this post. But instead of fat-shaming, you simply shame people with mental illnesses and claim their conditions are contagious so you better stay away from them.

@30: Indeed. A mental illness is a disability, not something that causes a person to be who they are. Being an asshole is not the same thing as a mental illness. Being misunderstood for being an asshole can sometimes apply, but that is obviously not the case here.

But to be fair, the individual discussed may not have any mental illness. Many people without eating disorders fret over their BMIs. It may be that the fat-shamer is just an asshole. It is best not to draw conclusions on medical conditions or disabilities without evidence.

Yes, there are some rare medical conditions that can affect a person's weight, but the vast majority of overweight people are so because they eat more calories than they need. A grown man should only eat around 2000-2200 calories a day. Some people eat almost that much in a single fast food meal.

Fat Americans always have excuses. It's always "glandular" or "genetic" for them. Bullshit. Why isn't the rest of the world as disgustingly fat as Americans? Why does the rest of the world anticipate encountering an obese American, and never a skinny one? It's the American culture and lifestyle of gigantic portions, fast food, and no cooking. The great part about American freedom though is you don't have to live like that. But if you're the sort of pathetic person that lives your life on default, then expect to look like your average repulsively obese American because that's what your culture & lifestyle breed.

Eating is often a coping mechanism, like promiscuity, drinking alcohol or taking drugs. It can be destructive, like those activities. And because even politically and socially progressive people are the product of our still-Puritanical society, we judge people for these perceived moral failings rather than seek to understand. We presume to know exactly how someone came to be the way they are without ever having met them, or remembering that everyone is an individual instead of a representative of a group. Judging makes us feel better about our own disappointments and failings.

What 42 said.

I'm losing weight at a rapid clip after decades of extreme obesity, but in my case it's because I've a) Found enough people in my life who love and support me as I am that I'm not as scared of facing my demons as I used to be, and am working through some of my underlying shit and need to self-soothe with food far less often, and b) Started using Tequila instead of food for the times when I still need a crutch to make it through to the next sunrise.

If you want to help a fat person get healthy, be a real friend to them. We all know we're fat, trying to make us feel bad about it is more likely to trigger a binge to try to climb out of the mental hole you're kicking us toward than anything else.

Judging fat people is stupid. I have plenty of family and friends who can eat whatever they want, not exercise, and not gain any weight. No one judges or shames them for their choices, which in many cases are just as unhealthy as those of most overweight people. You're not really shaming fat people for their choices, but for how they look, which makes you an empty, superficial piece of garbage.

44 sez - "which makes you an empty, superficial piece of garbage."

Ok, I'll let you in on something - I despise chiptunes. You know what else? Asparagus. Can't stand that awful shit. Another thing I don't like? Fat people. Yuck. Revolting.

What all those things have in common - It shouldn't matter one little bit to you.

Where the hell do you people get off trying to be thought police? I'm not going to love chiptunes because you tell me to. I'm not going to chow on asparagus to make you happy. And as for the landwhales, hambeasts, and jabbas out there I'm going to be revolted and disgusted regardless of what thinkpol douchebags consider acceptable.

@45 -- I wasn't policing your thoughts, I was just calling you a piece of garbage. I'm not going to explain to you the difference between asparagus and a human being. Maybe you're also grossed out by redheads, or dimples, or black people. You're free to think and vocalize whatever you want. And I'm free to think and vocalize that you're a piece of garbage.

I don't mind fat people, I mind their pathetic "whoa is me, I AM A VICTIM" attitude.

Seriously, put down the Dick's and go to a gym.

@47 - Not all fat people have the same attitude, and lots of skinny people pass themselves off as victims for other silly reasons. You're just generalizing because you're an idiot.

All this fat-hate is really discouraging, in terms of empathy and genuine human decency.

I'm sure none of you are so perfect that it's appropriate for you to tear others down in such a harsh way over a thing that really doesn't affect you.

Being overweight is not ideal, but the anger overweight people face--while living in a society where obesity is encouraged daily--is really uncalled for. And really, which is worse: being obese/lazy/lacking will power, or being filled with disgust and hatred over a thing as shallow as one's outward appearance?

@50

It's not about being shallow, sorry. If you are a super-sized obese human being, you are wearing your personal values on your XXXL sleeve. Your outward appearance says to me that two of your personal values are *gluttony* and *sloth*. I don't share those values and I don't have much respect for them, sorry. It's a lot more than your repulsive outward appearance.

And if you think you are above it all and don't "judge people" because you are a decent human being, you are totally delusional and not paying close attention to your own behavior. I'd bet you two cheeseburgers and a milkshake, for example, that you judge "skinny bitches." See?

@50:

It's not about being shallow, sorry. If you are a super-sized obese human being, you are wearing your personal values on your XXXL sleeve. Your outward appearance says to me that two of your personal values are *gluttony* and *sloth*.

No. It just means that you aren't able to conceive of a person without making them into a stereotype. And you then use this stereotype to justify discrimination and why you feel that you are in a special class of people who can judge others.

Your statement only points to your intellectual weaknesses and why you are the last person who should ever judge another. Learn about stereotypes, learn about ethics, and have some empathy, and then if you are lucky you might eventually become a decent human being. Right now you are not. You are an entitled asshole who is using stereotypes to justify fat-shaming.

52 sez - "You are an entitled asshole"

Judgemental justification. You must be in a special class of people who can judge others. Learn about your hypocrisy, then shut the fuck up.

@52

http://www.theonion.com/articles/450poun…

Judgmental doctors, just "stereotyping" everybody. Meanies! It's probably because the doctors are "intellectually weak" and lack empathy that they criticize him and don't respect his unique situation, special snowflake that he is. Don't you know it's glandular, doc? Remember Aunt Sarah? It's not his fault, he's the victim! Fat shamers!

It's the glands. It's the metabolism. It's the fibromyalgia. Genetics.

It's the fart sniffing hypocrisy. It's the thinkpol bullshit.

Everyone is entitled to their unique likes and dislikes. You like rock but classical disgusts you? Well OMG you must be a ethically weak horrible douchebag.

But as long as you can practice your intolerance in a PC way then *SNIIIFFF* Ahhhh my farts smell great. What a great feeling it must be to preach tolerance, and embrace intolerance. To preach acceptance, and attack attack attack what you don't like.

You want acceptance? You think that's the right thing to be fart sniffing PC hypocrisy advocates? Then BE ACCEPTING.

Obese people revolt me, and others. Deal with it. You can't shame us into changing, fat people just disgust us. You can't reason us into changing, jabba the hambeast makes us barf in our mouth.

I may not be fond of the things you like, I may wonder why you don't share my primal pleasure in various things, but I won't tell you you're a disgusting person for feeling that way.

Well done on exposing your true face here people. Decency? Empathy? Ethics? You hypocrites have none.

@55: Music and people are different things. If you can't see past a stereotype and see a person then you are a bigot. Everybody is entitled to dislike a type of music, but nobody is entitled to dislike a person based on a stereotype. You are not entitled to homophobia, misogyny, racism, or fat-shaming.

The criticism of fat shaming is not some academic exercise in extending protections. It has an effect on real people. It also leads to our national epidemic of eating disorders and body image problems, which are the deadliest mental illnesses. Fat shaming and our culture of being super thin are killing people and leading to incredibly disabling mental illnesses. Your hate and bigotry are hurting people. Where is your decency, empathy, or ethics there?

@54: You cited The Onion? You are such an idiot.

A research team I was on in college did a project where we asked 200 people to estimate their caloric intake per day, and then take a month of counting every calorie and keeping a accurate record.

Almost without fail, the thin people grossly overestimated their intake, and the fat people grossly underestimated it. Not 100% scientific, but the starkness of the results was pretty impressive.

This is why you get the slim person saying they gorge on cheese fries and cokes all day long, and the fat person claiming they only eat 1000 calories of vegetables and lean protein per day. Their perceptions are often way off.

But anyway, feel free to be disgusted by fat people, but do not be surprised when other people rightfully call you a small minded prick if you bring it up. Other people are not here to please you visually, you dickbags.

@Confluence, you really made up a lot of stuff and projected it onto me.
Which is not surprising, considering the things you project onto obese people, chiefly that you know their shitty core values because they have an outwardly obvious weakness.

Surely I judge; it is the human way. But I try to do so with a little humility. I may talk to someone and think they're an idiot, but I don't sit there and mull over how idiotic they are to inflate my own intelligence. I don't assume their core values are that of *ignorance* and *intellectual laziness* and *shallowness.* I used to do that, but it was a mean and angry thing to do.

Anyway, you have shown me nothing except more of what you already do--see one part of someone, presume and attach negative characteristics, and then come up with a zinger to justify yourself furthermore. And okay, I'm judging a part of you now. I don't know much about you, but I'm judging your automatic feelings towards obese people to be a narrow, unproductive manifestation of some kind of insecurity you have. I do it too with other things (we all do), but at least I'm trying to work on it.

@58, I appreciate your contribution.

@Confluence again, I think it's interesting, even, that you assume I am overweight. Like it is so infeasible that a fit person would ever stick up for the fatties.

I hate everyone fat,thin,past,present and future.humans are just a fleshy virus on the face of a shitty blue marble.on the other hand I love everyone on this beautiful planet of ours.what? Goddam this split personality.i love split personality.blah blah fucking blah