Columns Jul 11, 2012 at 4:00 am

You Nearly Crushed My Reason for Being

Comments

1
Almost. Now quit dwelling on a tragedy that didn't happen, go get your shit together and be the best mom you can be. He deserves that much for saving your life.
2
because the true and only value of a baby is that it's giving you a reason to live. sure, his death would be kinda sad to some degree in and of itself, but the real tragedy is how it would ENDANGER YOUR LIFE!!!

car drive is a self-centered reckless asshole. so is i, anon.
3
You'd imagine that someone suffering depression, loneliness, and drug addiction would make a grand father to a young lad, what with clutching him to his chest and sobbing hysterically. The child most certainly felt safe in the arms of so well-balanced a guardian and as a consequence could never grow up to suffer depression, loneliness, and drug addiction.
4
@1,2,3...

What inhumane fucks you are. I hope you get a soul-crushing tragedy so you can learn what it feels like.

Assholes.
5
@2 Believing that loving a child isn't a completely selfish act is a nice thought, sure, but ultimately false. Having kids is one of the most selfish acts we can do. That doesn't mean it is necessarily a bad thing, sometimes that selfishness manifests itself in good, giving, parenting, other times it manifests in self-centered and negligent parenting.

That being said, I like this I,A. Kind of reminds me of the scene from Speed where the buggy is (thankfully) full of soda cans but goes SOARING.
6
@4 what the hell are you talking about?

I,Anon is raving on about a "tragedy" that NEVER HAPPENED!

Having a stroller doesn't mean you have some sort of force field around you and all traffic will stay 500 ft away at all times.

you both can go find a group so you can bitch and moan about everyone else not orbiting your life correctly. ugh...
7
@6: Sounds like you're on Lynnwood Asshole's side here. Way to be a hard-assed unsentimental realist contrarian, putting those whining losers in their place. If you can't keep out of the way of drivers, keep the hell out of the crosswalk!
8
@4 Rujax! Wow, wishing a "soul-crushing tragedy" on not one but three people doesn't make you an "inhumane fuck"?
Um, yeah, it does. What is wrong with you?

P.S. She didn't experience a soul-crushing tragedy, she narrowly escaped one. As an addict, she DOES need to get her shit together for this kid. Love alone won't protect him. The advice I gave her WAS nothing but humane. Ever heard of tough love?
9
When my kids were in strollers, I was always hyper-alert. Sounds like IA was too. But the fact is that assholes drive cars. People pushing strollers are ultimately responsible for ensuring the safety of their reason for living. And I always thought the stroller was inherently flawed. Yeah, I want to push my baby in front of me where ever I need to walk. Now my kids are grown. When I walk my dog, I make sure he never enters the path of a crosswalk or alley before me. It's all you can really do. Oblivious assholes are everywhere. As are unpredictable dogs who may attack, germy people who feel entitled to touch cute babies in strollers and every other conceivable danger in and out of our homes. Get used to it and be the protector. If you're going to sob every time your kid cheats death, you'll be sobbing for decades.
10
Five bucks says that the driver saw the mother and the stroller, but chose not to stop. You can tell when they have that stony "I don't see you. I don't see you. I swear to fucking God I don't see you!" look they have on their faces.
11
@4

Well your sentimentality has blinded you to the obvious and perverse insanity of the anon. It's really a fucking huge load to lay on one's children, that you would have no reason for being without them; obviously, the insane have no fucking place raising children.

I suspect anon is inflicting very real and daily child abuse on his/her ward.

Grow a fucking pair, faggot.
12
I like bacon.
13
Spoiler alert: all of you are going to die of something. I hate to quote Dr. Laura but, "Now go take on the day!"

P.S. None of your children are special. In fact, many are below average and would not be missed.
14
"Hmmm..how do I escape addiction and depression? I know, I'll have baby!!" So, no longer addicted to drugs, but now addicted to the baby. Yeah, THAT'S healthy parenting!
15
Oh, and don't forget to watch for adult pedestrians too.
16
Find something else to live for, besides just your child. As an only child who sometimes also feels like my mom's only link to the outside world / reason to live, it is fucking tiring.
17
I don't want to the ref at this kids future soccer games. Oh wait, the kid won't be playing sports or having a remotely normal childhood but will rebel and become one of those people who jump off cliffs wearing batsuits.
18
1) As a mother, I gotta say, its clear that most of you kids don't have kids. which is fine, but it does change fucking everything.
(And the time will come for most of you, that you will get your ear-bud-implanted, mustachioed and/ or giant-80s-glasses-wearing heads out of your anuses, reproduce, and discover, quite poetically, what a bunch of righteous little douches you were, and you will laugh at your former selves, as we all do, post-offspring.)
2) While I am not actually bitter or cynical in the least, and I do love humans, I do not trust strangers with the life of my child. (That means cell-phone-talking-bitches making hard rights and fixi-riding-earbud-listening-morons in all their youthful unfallibility, "owning" the road, alike.) Don't step out when the light changes, under the assumption that the rest of the world gives a fuck. It can lead to a deeply unfortunate form of natural selection. 'Cause they don't give a fuck, until it's too late.
3) Carry your kid. Its healthier for them. Its healthier for you. That stroller bullshit is just a series of unfortunate events waiting to unfold in cartoon slow-motion. Carry the little fuckers! (Especially all you lame-ass-one-hand-only stroller dads who think you look cooler and less emasculated when you only push the kid with one hand. (Do you mow the fucking lawn with one hand, too?)
4) Remember that this is the first of thousands of moments in your life in which you will feel powerless in the face of unimaginable circumstances. Pace yourself. Be aware of your surroundings at all times. Teach your son to be streetwise, aware, well-mannered and empathetic. (None of these need to be mutually exclusive!!!) Give thanks for every day that you get to be blessed with his presence in your life. Especially the days when you feel like pushing him out into traffic yourself, because you will surely have them.
19
Am I missing the part where it says that this was a mother and not a father besides the drawing? Kinda sounds more like a whiny dude dad to me. Just sayin that a dad would probably be able to handle much more copious amounts of COCAINE (that I'm very disappointed was left out earlier due to apparent sensitivity to IA's addiction issue).
20
@18 if having children matured you, I'd hate to imagine what your rants were like before
21
I have no doubt this was a terrifying experience for anon.

However: *Everyone* loves their kids as much as you do. To every parent, their child is the most amazing, beautiful, precious thing they can imagine, and the love they feel for them is overwhelmingly incredible. So don't talk like this person (or anyone else) is incapable of understanding that.

So, I'm very sorry that happened to you, but I feel you overreacted. I hope you really have your addiction under control, and aren't only staying sober for your child. Because someday your kid will grow up into a willful, narcissistic little thing that won't be as easy to love as an 8-month-old. Please go see a counselor about your substance abuse and don't make your child your *only* reason for staying sober. Your child will stress the shit out of you someday.
22
I was almost run over by a bus on Pike once. I was almost run over in a parking lot in SLU by a drunk cowboy in a jacked up pick up. My mom and dad visiting from Illinois were almost run over by fire truck down on the waterfront back in the 80s. Down in pioneer square in the 90s there were some gunshots and I heard a snap like the crack of a whip above my head. I'm pretty sure I almost had my brains blown out. Coming back from a party in Bremerton one forth of july my best friend was totally wasted and almost fell off the front of a ferry. Just last week I got between a sow bear and her two cubs. That could have been bad. And there were those crawdads from The New Orleans that made me wish I was dead. I'm sure I'm forgetting some. Oh, wait yeah, there was the kid in the Ford Falcon who pulled out of a ranch driveway on US 97 out of Wenatchee while I was passing, going about 75. That would have been clean up on aisle 7, let me tell you.
23
I liked Monkwild's (18) comment. @20- do you wear earbuds, big 80s sunglasses, and ride fixie?
Then I hardly see how it could possibly offend you.
24
I agree with 21. I sympathize with Anon.

As a mother who has gone through some hard shit too, in order to repay your child for saving your life when it was very compromised, I encourage you, Anon, to do all in your power to mature as a person and have many interests outside of your child.

The more interests and frienships you'll have in your life, the less likely you'll be to count on her/him for a reason to go on living. And children are not strong enough to be used as crutches by their parents. You need to become strong enough for your child to lean on you, later on.

Good point, though, about killing the irresponsible driver if tragedy had happened. Irresponsible drivers should be made aware of the risk of apeshit-going stroller pushers. Hope that will calm down some.
25
Did I happen to miss any reference to malt liquor? "Copious cocaine" is only half the equation.....
26
All the left turns at that intersection are protected left turns. Don't jaywalk with your baby.
27
I'd be pissed if somebody almost hit my child, but the language about the only reason to live being the child is scary. Also, they are putting their life and stability on this child.

If this attitude persists, this person is going to be an abusive parent.
28
In the past 2 months I have witnessed 4 hit and runs, wake the fudge up Seattle drivers. I have a kid and strollers scare the crap out of me, wear your children when they are young.
29
Everyone in Seattle seems to be so self-righteous, so "I am the center of the Universe and I am all that matters". You may be the center of YOUR universe, but you gotta watch out for other people, too. That goes for the asshole driver AND the goofy, melodramatic parent. You gotta watch everyone else pretty much at all times. Yell at them when they NEARLY hit you, panic awhile, then get the fuck over it. It's gonna happen again...and again. It happens everywhere, but it seems especially concentrated in Seattle.
Where I live, we had a young punk that was ALWAYS speeding down the street, and entreaties to the cops, the city council, and even his parents, did nothing. Finally, I told the cops that if anything happened to the kids on our street, the little punk wasn't going to survive long enough for them to get there to save his ass! We would pull him from that piece of shit pickup and you would not recognize the bloody pulp that resulted! Finally, the cops got ahold of him and said, "We're doing this to protect YOU, because if something happens, these people are going to KILL YOU, and we do not doubt them!" It stopped, finally. Now we've got another one...sigh. (I don't have kids, but, you hurt my neighbour's kids, I will be right behind them in beating the fuck out of you!)
30
Though I must correct: by "Seattle", I mean the entire metro area...this actually took place in Lynnwood...but the closer to Seattle you get, the worse it gets. Pedestrians walk out in front of you expecting you to stop on a dime because they have the right-of-way, drivers expecting you to get out of their way because where they have to go is far more important...etc.
And @18 needs to really get over herself..."it's obvious none of you have kids..." typical self-righteous Seattle parent...no one else can understand the trials of parenthood but them...*sigh*...
31
You were using the crosswalk, yes? Not that it would be any less tragic if you were jaywalking and were hit, but I see so many parents with their strollers jaywalk without so much as a glance for incoming traffic. There are rules of the road for motorists AND pedestrians, so please parents of young children, if not for yourself, LOOK before you cross.
32
Jesus. Co-dependent on your kid much? Lucky boy.
33
Shitty, distracted drivers are kinda like porn consumers. Just as none of us are shitty, distracted drivers, none of us watch porn, either. It's just one small, dedicated group of moneyed perverts,and one small, dedicated group of sleepy, cellphone using drivers. But we're certainly not like those people! Except when we get a really important call. Or the radio is playing nothing but shitty music so we have to keep changing the station. Or we were up really late the night before and we have to be at work in five and we're still twenty minutes away... speed limit!

They've done studies. A majority of drivers in this country think they're above average drivers. So at least sixty percent of people think they're better drivers than most... when they're most.

Furthermore, none of us ever talk during a movie, answer a call in a restaurant, made a scene on an airplane when we were infants. It's always other people, making life difficult for us.
34
I almost hit a stroller. I was making a right at a busy intersection and was looking left, break in traffic, started to roll and looked right.. SLAMMED BRAKES. My heart raced, eyes filled with tears, I mouthed "OH MY GOD I'M SO SORRY" to the pissed off mom pushing the stroller... took about an hour for me to think "Hmm... maybe she shouldn't have put her baby in front of a car that was halfway into the intersection with a driver that was looking the other way" I was totally in the wrong for rolling forward, but maybe people need to be a little more cautious with their oh so precious cargo that they push out in front of them.
35
So the person in the stroller is simply a support to keep you alive? It is all about you, you, you. I here nothing about how terrible it would be if you baby died for his loss of of life, his chance at growing up, savoring the world all fucked and gone. What a selfish and self obsessed mother you are. It is his life now - he is not a crutch for you. Go deal with your addiction independently of the child.
36
All y'all got trolled. The whole idea of stories like this is to make anyone who doesn't believe that society should exist purely for the benefit of kids look like an asshole.
37
you should get a more fulfilling life, before your trainwrecked self is the thing that crushes your child.
38
Due to traffic at aurora village, 200th and aurora has protected left turns in all directions. The only way this happened is if loving mom crossed against the light. Just an FYI.
39
Right, cause there is no way the driver would've turned early or late.
41
I want to get a cheap stroller, fill it with overripe tomatoes (or something similar), and push it ahead of me when crossing the street. That'll teach those fuckers who turn right on red without ever pausing or looking.

Some pedestrians are reckless and some drivers are assholes. Even if I look both ways and use caution, some guy going 30mph around a turn could still kill me. Even if I drive very cautiously, some idiot could walk out in front of my car. It sounds like Anon was being reasonably cautious -- using the crosswalk, hopefully looked before crossing -- and some guy took a left hand turn all the way across the intersection to try to hit her. That is some seriously asshole driving.
42
I know this happened in Lynwood and no one was physically harmed (IA, please seek/continue with counseling – it’s gonna get tougher) but it reminds me of all the close calls I’ve had downtown both as a driver and a pedestrian.

What can we do to go to “all walk” intersections throughout the city? Let’s get rid of the free right turn and walking on green. Instead let’s add an all-walk to the light cycle. Think of how much faster and safer pedestrians could move throughout the city and how much easier traffic could flow, if drivers weren’t fighting pedestrians in order to turn.

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