Maybe she likes being unhappily in love.

"HE DOESN'T WANT TO BE YOUR BOYFRIEND, HE WANTS TO BE YOUR FUCKFRIEND."

Uh yeah. Or, he wants to be your boyfriend while also being married or with another woman?

Something about the cake and eating it too?

Why buy the cow when you get the sex for free?

@ 2: Based on IA's letter, I'm pretty sure he doesn't actually EAT the cake.

I read something about negative pleasure the other day, in relation to why people tend to make the same bad choices over and over again, despite always having the same shitty things happen to them. Whether she realizes it or not, she's getting something out of these situations; pleasure isn't always positive. The trick is recognizing when it isn't and then taking steps to change that fact.

http://xkcd.com/513/

I like this week's I anon.

(Also, I could have used an anonymous letter like this, way back when).

Don't assume she doesn't know what's going on. Maybe she's not ready for a "relationship" or hasn't found the right guy, but still likes to fuck?

This girl sounds pretty awesome to me! Whats the problem?

At the same time I bet this is a lesbian who has a crush on a straight friend but is upset that the straight friend is a head over heals infatuated with the guy giving her the sausage four nights a week but none of the emotion she would be willing to give at the end all purpose of rubbing clitoris's together someday. Selfish selfish Lesbian creeper.

@11good observation. I went back and reread and I totally agree. I didn't notice the first time I read it though. But dog parks snowboarding and the movies all sound good to me and I know for a fact there are men out there who think so too. So maybe she's just screwing him till the dog park guy comes along(this totally happened to me)killing time. Don't worry he will.

@10: Considering your rather wild conjecture, I'll bet a 'selfish lesbian creeper' fucked an ex-girlfriend of yours. And considering your rather disgusting (and kind of chickenshit, with the apostrophes) handle, I'll bet you deserved it.

@13 well said. Totally got dumped for a chick. Ha ha.

The guy won't even go down on her? Forget boyfriend material, this guy isn't even fuckbuddy material.

On a related note, the spellchecker suggested that i replace the word "fuckbuddy" with "buckboard."

Buckboard is the new "fuck buddy"!

Fuck who you want to fuck and don't let your friends tell you otherwise.

You gotta fuck where you wanna fuck,
Do what you wanna do
With whoever you wanna do it with.
You gotta fuck where you wanna fuck,
And do what you wanna do
With whoever you wanna do it with.
You don't understand
That a girl like me can love just one man.
Three thousand miles, that's how far you'll fuck.
And you said to me "Please don't follow".
Cause you gotta fuck where you wanna fuck
And do what you wanna do
With whoever you wanna do it with.
Babe, you gotta fuck where you wanna fuck
And do what you wanna do
With whoever you wanna do it with.
You don't understand
That a girl like me can love just one man.
You've been gone a week, and I tried so hard
Not to be the crying kind -
Not to be the girl you left behind.
You gotta fuck where you wanna fuck
And do what you wanna do
With whoever you wanna do it with.
You gotta fuck where you wanna fuck (Fuck where you want)
And do what you wanna do (Do what you want)
With whoever you wanna do it with.
You gotta fuck where you wanna fuck (Fuck where you want)
And do what you wanna do (Do what you want)
With whoever you wanna do it with.

I want to do all those things with your friend. Except for snowboarding.

I hadn't really considered the Lesbian Angle, but I now think that's a good possibility. I'm sure that many lesbians know quite a but about stimulating the clitorious, but not all chicks are into that. But Anon is entitled to have her fantasy, just as I'm entitled to my fantasy involving hot skinny 18 year old skater boys in tighty-whities stuffed with schnitzengruben.

You are friend-zoned. Get over it.

@10 and the rest: I don't see any evidence that the letter-writer is a woman. It could just as easily be a dude-friend who desperately wants to be her boyfriend, but she doesn't think of the letter writer 'in that way'
Yep. Been there.

#21 called it: the dreaded Friend Zone

@ctmcmull: are the purveyor of the schnitzengruben that Mr. Zifferelli pines for? Why else would you hate on the gender assumptions of these other fine folks?

@ctmcmull: are you the purveyor of the schnitzengruben that Mr. Zifferelli pines for? Why else would you hate on the gender assumptions of these other fine folks?

#25 said:

Christopher. I can see what your saying... Pamela`s storry is unbelievable...

You are correct! And both the "lesbian" thing and the "Friend Zone" thing are probably true. "Pamela" just can't get over the fact that her friend likes to get pounded the real thing without the baggage of emotional attachment, and if her friend would just let Pamela work her cunning linguistics on her nether regions and then cuddle, the universe would be in alignment... Alas, Pamela is destine to work her magic on herself with her mechanical buddy while fantasizing about her lipstick lesbo dream boat.

@23 ????

I get the sense that 11 is correct.

@12 Sometimes Dog Park Guy never comes.

#6 ftw.

and oh yeah, honey, your boyfriend's married, so you might wanna move on.

I really don't know what's up with this chickie and her fuck buddy. But what I *DO* know is how to get a hairy scrotum.

You should know how to get a hairy scrotum if you want a more rugged, manly appearance. If you are a natural born hairless person, it isn't a shocker that you don’t have enough scrotum hair. Nevertheless, it isn't really the end of the world. The issue is completely fixable without drugs or surgery. These three simple steps will guide you on how to get a hairy scrotum.

To get a hairy scrotum, you will need:

Two tablespoons Brandy
One Egg
Plastic bag
Two Small towels
Warm water
Small mixing bowl
Applicator
Chair

Mix egg and brandy together. The first step is to make an alcohol conditioner. Put egg and brandy into a small mixing bowl. Stir them for a minute or so until they blend in together nicely. Pour the conditioner into an applicator. Set it on a side.

Apply the conditioner on your scrotum. The second step is to glaze your scrotum with the conditioner. Do this step in your bathroom is recommended because you can clean up any mess immediately in the shower. Grab a chair and put a small towel on it. Remove your underwear and get yourself seated. Have the other small towel, plastic bag, and applicator handy.

Squeeze out the conditioner gently from the applicator onto your scrotum. Once you are finished, wrap your scrotum up with the plastic bag. Make sure that the conditioner isn’t coming off. Wrap your scrotum again with the other small towel. Let the condition sit for at least fifteen minutes. Rinse your scrotum thoroughly afterwards with warm water.
Repeat these two steps as much as you want daily. The third step is to go through these two steps when necessary. You can do it every day if you want to see the results faster.

With the help of these three simple steps, getting a hairy scrotum is definitely possible. Don’t feel bad anymore if you have a hairless scrotum. Be happy and say Hello to your hairy scrotum very soon!

#31, or at least you'll get your balls licked by someone who loves a good eggnog

Could be a lesbian thing, could be a "beta" male trying to displace an "alpha".

Guy is definitely married.

@34 - Her "fuck buddy" is married just because all he wants is sex? It's possible, but there are plenty of unattached single guys around that prefer sex without emotional attachment, and many unattached single women who want the same.

I, Anon is probably a Lesbian Friend. If only the subject of her desire would only understand what Lesbian Friend could give her... A tongue lashing or something, and maybe an introduction to a few power tools - and a creepy controlling "significant other"...

High potential for a stalker. Probably engineers "random" and "coincidental" intersections - shows up at the bar, the grocery, the coffee shop, the dance club...

Sounds like a very sweet and compassionate sentiment from a loving friend. Y'all are cynical freaks.

@21: http://www.stuffyouwillhate.com/2012/05/…

@35 wrote: @34 - Her "fuck buddy" is married just because all he wants is sex? It's possible, but there are plenty of unattached single guys around that prefer sex without emotional attachment, and many unattached single women who want the same.

Yeah but I would think a single guy would limit his time with her to once a week because he's probably trolling the bars looking for one night stands or new fuck buddies...or maybe already has a few other fuckbuddies. If he's doing her three or four times a week - that sounds more like an extramarital affair than a fuckbuddy situation. It's a lot of time to spend on one person.