I'm not usually the kind of person who can't take a hint, but the situation has escalated and you leave me no choice. I'm sorry to do this in public, but I've tried e-mail, text, Facebook private message, and a direct message on Twitter. I've called you, Skyped you, pinged you, and poked you, all to no avail. Apparently, there's no way to get your attention other than traditional media. Even though this is on you, I'm still sorry it had to come to this.

It has now been five months and 13 days since I invited you to join me and thousands of others as my friend and ally in the social-media revolution known as Ello. Your response? Nothing. You neither accepted my offer nor declined it. And I'd like to know why.

Was it something I said? Something I didn't say? Are you too "cool" for Ello? I see you don't mind being my friend on other social-media platforms. You had no compunction about liking my recent Instagram photo of a Better Call Saul screencap. And did my eyes deceive me, or weren't you among those who retweeted my retweet of @TheAtlantic's story about the 20th anniversary of Radiohead's The Bends? So what gives? You only want my friendship in commercially approved social-media zones? Are you just addicted to lurking? You're making me look like a fucking idiot in front of everyone, and I don't deserve that. I would NEVER do this to you.

Consider my invitation withdrawn.