Columns May 6, 1999 at 4:00 am

Comments

1
"And finally, if you're concerned about Chinese stereotypes, why were you pulling a rickshaw around Halifax?"

lololololol
2
Numerous research studies over the years have concluded that average ERECT penis length varies little by race, with the average between 5 1/2 and 6 1/2 inches (don't know about girth, which I'd be interested in). They also note the existence of "statistical outliers" between 1 and 10 inches.

However, several have also pointed out that FLACCID length varies much more widely, from 1 1/2 inches to 6 inches. They point out that the smaller flaccid penises tend to grow the most, while the largest penises tend to just become firmer, without gaining much better.

Based on my experience, and a little speculation, I think that Asian men are "grow-ers" (my favorite way to think of this is that Asian men prefer to keep their swords sheathed for protection until they are needed), while black men are "show-ers", and white man are probably somewhere in the middle.

Naturally, if all of your experience seeing other men's penises is in the locker room, where (hopefully) everyone is flaccid, you'd conclude that Asian men have smaller penises, and black men have larger penises, than average. Only multicultural sluts and sex researchers would know better.
3
Well, I suppose I could be considered a "multicultural slut", although my expertise lies mostly in the black/white variety with one asian and one mexican thrown in for good measure. I will not give the numbers for where my statistics originated from, but I have to say that I have found ZERO correlation between race and penis size. A couple of the smallest I've seen were of the darker shade. The asian guy was so amped about his (approximately 7 incher) that it made me never want to go near the thing. Every time anything resembling an opportunity* would arise he would whip it out proudly. In the less "opportune" times he would grab my hand and shove it down his pants. Or try to anyway, I got tired of that game pretty damn quickly. Talk about dick over-exposure.

*Opportunity here meaning any time we were alone or in a darkish room or on a day the sun had risen.
4
I don't think that NWTG will be seeing this, but I was having fun going through the archives and just couldn't resist commenting on the spunky semen dilemma maybe for the benefit of others perusing through these oldies. Having your guy eat a fair amount of pineapple helps considerably with the taste. Having my guy avoid beer and eat pineapple on days where we knew I'd be sucking him off made things far more pleasant for me.
5
There actually is some science behind the stereotypes about relative member size, but it has to do with flacid rather than working length. Asians, and/or people from cold climates, tend to have members that retract significantly when flacid, while people whose ancestors were never in a cold climate tend to have a flacid length closer to their working length.

That is, it's a difference between "showers" and "growers", rather than a difference in actual erect size. The myths likely resulted because men and boys are more likely to end up comparing size in situations where very few of them, if any, will be aroused (locker rooms and whatnot)...

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