Columns Aug 28, 2008 at 4:00 am

Sexphobes and Sextras

Comments

1
Pretty cool idea - having Dan over as a speaker. If I was actually in Washington (or remotely close), I would really consider the opportunity.
2
my advice to the girl who digs chicks:
I am also 30, and have recently ended my long term relationship with my common law husband to be with a woman. Thing is, we bought a house together and are still living together, now with different bedrooms. We are still best friends, and affectionate, and the love is still there, but changed. He is also now seeing another lovely woman.

So take heart, being truthful and following your heart will never wreck your life! He will still be your friend, and you will always love each other. You won't regret exploring your desire for women.
3
I guess being faithful to your partner is just a word, cause it seems like everyone is freaking cheating on each other. Hell, after reading soooooo many of these columns, I'm scared to get into a relationship. Oh well fuck it I'll just stay single and just hook up with different sluts. No need to get my feelings involve. PEACE OUT :)
4
"Hell, after reading soooooo many of these columns, I'm scared to get into a relationship. Oh well fuck it I'll just stay single and just hook up with different sluts. No need to get my feelings involve."

Yes, there's a plan. Pretend that your failure to have a real relationship is due to all the horror stories you read on Savage Love. Because as much as we all love this column (I heart U, Dan!), guess what: this is only a representative sample of PEOPLE WHO ARE FUCKED UP IN LOVE. (Which is all of us, at one time or another, but not all of us all the time). People who are perfectly happy, hanging out on the couch watching reruns of House aren't writing in to Dan. So give it a try, you puss. You might just like it.
5
To "Bi truthful": I'm very glad that WDIHTDC's scenario worked out so well for you and your ex, but I think you gave some overly optimistic advice in your reply. I definitely think that WDIHTDC needs to prepare for the possibility that her current boyfriend could be very hurt, and feel more than a little betrayed. WDIHTDC never said she *stopped* having sex with her boyfriend, just that she didn't want to anymore.

I completely agree with Dan's advice about WDIHTDC doing the decent thing and being completely honest about her current situation. But telling her that: "He will still be your friend, and you will always love each other." feels like what head-shrinkers refer to as 'Projection' on your part masquerading as sound advice.
6
I think that, handled correctly, basically as dan advised, situations like WDIHTDC's can and often do end up hapilly as said by another reader, at least in long term. My dads first wife after 18 years together, and two kids, discovered her love for women and was up front about it. It was really rough in him at first, although he understood, just because of Beeing, allthogh for good reason, effectivly dumped. He is now remaried and quite happy, and has a strong relationship to his first wife, and to her current wife.
Just trying to give another positive, to help to make a difficult choice
7
How awesome. I go to WWU, and missed your talk, come back!
8
http://www.sfgate.com/webdb/prop8/

In light of the ruling to shield these people, please post the names of WA State residents who supported Prop 8 in CA.

You can sort by State, then Amount, & higher contributors have
business names you should post, too.

Mike Murray Support $100,000.00 WA Redmond 10/27/08 Details
Donald Pugh Support $50,000.00 WA Bellevue 10/27/08 Details
Lin Whatcott Support $10,005.00 WA Maple Valley 10/18/08 Details
Lin Whatcott Support $9,995.00 WA Maple Valley 9/16/08 Details
Bryant Adams Support $5,000.00 WA Tumwater 10/28/08 Details
Deborah Bell Support $2,500.00 WA Bingen 9/11/08 Details
William Ziprick Support $2,000.00 WA Spokane 10/31/08 Details
Larry Loveridge Support $1,000.00 WA Kennewick 8/28/08 Details
Clyde Carpenter Support $1,000.00 WA Olympia 9/18/08 Details
Marie Wade Support $1,000.00 WA Longview 9/19/08 Details
Jacob Waldron Support $1,000.00 WA Maple Valley 10/19/08 Details
Mark Yokers Support $1,000.00 WA Normandy Park 10/30/08 Details
Sheree Tanner Support $750.00 WA Vancouver 9/9/08 Details
David Lloyd Support $585.00 WA Redmond 9/7/08 Details
Bennett Packard Support $500.00 WA Selah 7/1/08 Details
Elaine Dunn Support $500.00 WA Spokane Valley 7/7/08 Details
Michael Anderson Support $500.00 WA Port Orchard 8/4/08 Details
Heather Shelton Support $500.00 WA Dupont 8/24/08 Details
Geoff Davis Support $500.00 WA Redmond 8/27/08 Details
Andrew Wheelwright Support $500.00 WA Monroe 8/29/08 Details
9
This is from ages ago but I'm posting now anyway. From Dan:

Why Do I Have To Dig Chicks?

"First off, WDIHTDC, no one has to dig chicks. It's an elective, not a course requirement. (Except at Evergreen, of course.)"

How stupid! I know you're not stupid Dan but this comment certainly is a stupid one. She didn't write, "why does the world have to dig chicks?" Presumably, you have enough sense not to apply her question to the rest of the world. Apparently, not.

10
People who are perfectly happy, hanging out on the couch watching reruns of House aren't writing in to Dan. So give it a try, you puss. You might just like it.
________
er, no. Don't encourage this knob to go out and "date." If the guy doesn't have enough sense to realise that women aren't "sluts" just because they are having sex with him (which implies his own guilt surrounding sex and not the women he is with) then maybe he needs to go and find some happiness so he has something to share with others instead of just taking.

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