@101: "By that logic my boyfriend is denying me my rights because we have threesomes with girls, but not guys."

It sounds like you are expecting me to disagree with that statement.

Your boyfriend is getting everything he wants out of the situation, while you are getting only part of what you want -- and the specific thing that leaves you wanting is something that he is getting while you are being denied. I would expect your boyfriend to be able to look you in the eye and say to you, "Yes, I admit it: I'm being a completely insecure, hypocritical douchebag about this. Are you willing to humor me?"

Apparently the answer is yes, you are willing to humor him. (If you weren't willing to humor him, you would be writing a letter very much like what ERIC wrote.) But don't pretend that the situation is even or equal.

@FAIL:

Back up a sec everyone: re-read the original email about the guy into MMF, and you will see that everyone is jumping to a big conclusion by assuming this guy is "bi" in the first place.

Dan and most readers took this assumption and ran (and ran) with it, but the *facts* of the letter indicate nothing beyond a straight guy who just wants to try DP. This is a common porn theme, and not a gay or even bi-curious one. Watch 'em and see.

On a related note, Dan recently wrote that a guys into She-males were exclusively straight in his experience.

So a guy who wants to have sex with a shemale (a biological male) is "straight"? But a guy who wants to try DP is "bi"?

Sorry everyone, you have your heads up your collective asses on this one.

Re ERIC: in my view Dan is too quick to accept people's preferences as a given. You need to dig a little deeper into what it is that makes her uncomfortable, and honestly, does she really get a veto right? Isn't slavery illegal?
There are different ways to approach this and we lack information, but the bottom line has to be that ERIC has a right to do what he wants insofar as this makes his wife only psychologically uncomfortable and not in any real mortal peril. If he chooses not to exercise that right in the interests of the best relationship payoff available to him, that's his choice; it doesn't take away his right.
I think making the wife aware of where the tradeoff turns negative for him could help her to be more honest towards herself about her reasons for denying him the liberty she herself enjoys.

Your advice for ERIC sucks cock like a vacuum cleaner
You don't really think she'll give up on her adventures do you?
The only thing she will give up on is telling him about it..