I made the tragic error of marrying my husband before we had sex. He was a 5 second track star who would fall off giggling like a little girl every time. I say don't talk to him about it. It's his way, don't try to change it. Just leave him before you marry him. The sooner, the better. I can't figure out why you haven't left him already. But then, I stayed in that marriage with just lousy, lousy sex for four years. So who am I to talk? Oh yeah, the voice of experience. That's who I am.

@102 : The "how to handle the abuse conversation" would be a good thing.

In my experience : don't tell it too soon. If your partner is a POS, you'd be just giving him a free pass at further sexually abusing and degrading you.

As in : you're damaged goods, and he's just a hero to stay with you, 'cause not many would stand the pressure of being with a survivor. Also, if sex is boring with him, it's entirely because of your sexual abuse, so changing the sex routine is out of question. And "it would be the same with any other partner... provided you could find another".

i agree with 23, its definetely easier to make more noise than less (in relation to whats natural to you) my girlfriend wanted me to make less noise when i eat, (beacuse it turns her on at inappropriate times) and more noise during sex, (im usually silent) and i find it much easier to do the later. in regards to CF, i have mixed feelings about girls with daddy issues, its extremely hot to me but it also seriously creeps me out since i can't help thinking about the kids i'll eventually have. the first time my gf looked up at me with innocent eyes and called me daddy i got an instant boner and strong desire to go puke.

Aww, I think being able to turn a manly man into a puddle of goo making TLBKG Noises is the best thing ever. Sorry the letter writer doesn't feel that way. I agree with those who have said "pass him on to someone who'll appreciate those noises".