Not people to avoid, per se, but if you're dating an ethnic studies or foreign language major and you're not of that nationality/ethnicity, or not a native speaker of said language, prepare to be dumped for such a person.

Trust Fund Babies: If you’re not one, don’t associate with one, and certainly don’t date one. They have no patience for your constant, annoying concerns about things like “study,” “grades,” and “work.”

All good except Malibu is awesome.

"Old dudes/grad students/TAs who sniff around first-year students"
Also, these are adult losers who are low-status amongst people their own age. They will be adult losers their entire lives.

You forgot to mention the religionists. I don't know how it is these days but in my college years the Campus Crusade for Christ had their agents everywhere.

Your immune system doesn't protect you from ringworm or athletes foot.

Christian Closet Case: yes, he's super hot and yes, he's got a huge D. But one kiss is enough to send him off to his Jesus-minder to confess his blood hot urges for man on man sex and falling into the pit of guilt-despair over it. You're not going to make him become your love-conquers-all gay BF so let him go and get an unapologetic queer on Grindr.

Yeah I get that this is not 100% serious, however...the name one is stupid. People of the same age are bound to have the same name. We kept a list when I was in college of all the Chris's (male and female - Christina, Christians, Christophers, etc.), Matts (Matthews), and Michaels (Mikes) we knew because there were so many of them and we stayed away from all of the goddamn Jennifers! So many Jennifers! (can you guess what year we were all born)?

I may spell my name, informally, as xina, but it's Christina and I met another Christina my freshman year and she and I not only have the same name, but the same birthday (day/month/year) and were born in the same state (not the state we went to college in). We are still good friends today. She is an amazing human being on every single level (far more amazing than I am) and if I had followed such a stupid rule, I would have lost out on an incredible friendship with an incredible human being. People don't choose their own names.

"They will probably end up working for an investment bank or, like, Amazon." You mean actual careers as opposed to working for the stranger.

Libertarians. Most of the people I met in college who self-identified as Libertarian were selfish, naïve douchebags. That's most....I'm sure you were the exception.

Isolate yourself from any sort of experience that makes you uncomfortable in order to prepare yourself for a healthy adulthood.

All these college advice columns the Stranger does are so completely from the perspective of going away to live at a college. Probably a pricey private liberal arts school in the experience of most of the authors. It's insufferably bougie.

Is there no one there took the bus to a community college while.holding down some dogshit job at Ross Dress for Less or whatever while still.living at home? You know, like regular people do? We're the column on how to get through that?

Whatever merit @3's argument may have: The people who aren't walking around barefoot inside are the ones "actively contributing to the bacterial culture." Just because you haven't recently stepped in a pile doesn't mean the soles of your shoes aren't covered with dogshit. They are. The parts of your body you put inside said shoes in order to protect them from the elements are probably pretty clean.

Westerners, with some exceptions, have weird hangups about feet.

Shoes are actually far dirtier than going barefoot. Really, they are! Most shoes are never washed, and are literally so germy that they stink. I wash my feet daily.

@Clara T, because of course everybody lives in the big city where there's a college in town, and nobody lives in rural areas or remote small towns and therefore must move away from Mom and Dad to get a higher education.