Thursday, April 4

8:00 OXY HYPE!--Movie

(1996) Travel back to the thrilling days of flannel and superfluous ski caps.


Friday, April 5

8:00 CBS AFP: AMERICAN FIGHTER PILOT

On the first day of Top Gun flight school, the recruits have an underpants-modeling competition.


Saturday, April 6

9:00 AMC COUNT YORGA, VAMPIRE--Movie

(1970) Yorga gets his blood-suckin' groove on in this hippie-filled retelling of Dracula.


Sunday, April 7

8:00 A&E SHACKLETON--Movie

(2002) Limey Kenneth Branagh goes to Antarctica and gets caught ass-deep in ice!

9:00 ABC ALIAS

Sydney is on a secret mission and runs into an old ex-boyfriend (who accuses her of stealing all of his Duran Duran records).


Monday, April 8

9:00 ABC THE BACHELOR

A new game show in which 16 women humiliate themselves to impress one single meathead.


Tuesday, April 9

9:00 COM THE SWEET SPOT

Bill Murray and his family compete against each other and exchange smacktalk in an annual golf tournament.


Wednesday, April 10

9:00 WB FELICITY

When school gets tough, Felicity decides to do what the rest of us have been doing for years--CHEAT.

Need some "merchandise"? steve@thestranger.com