It's a Christmas Miracle! Don't forget to give props to the Virgin Mary for plopping out the little guy in the first place. This whole affair has been stinking of masculinity anyway.

I AM SO SHOCKED!

This whole thing has been so god damned HILARIOUS! I love it.

Damn. If it turns out that the hack and threats came from a former Sony IT person? It will go down in history as the perfect synthesis of irony, hubris, cynicism, greed and schadenfreude. Basically encapsulating all of 2014 in one single event.

Sarnath'd by Dan!

And the ultimate irony?

All the absurd PR Sony has generated over this movie actually increases the likelihood some attention-seeking nut somewhere will try shooting up a theater now filled with armed paranoids going to prove their patriotism by seeing this movie. And there would be an ensuing patriotic blood bath.

Then of course it becomes decidedly not hilarious. Just sadly predictable. This being 'Murica-fuck-yeah and all.

tkc, maybe Santa will bring you some Ativan.

@4-- I had the exact same awful thought.

#2 for the win (it's exactly what I've wondering because of the really bitchy personal nature of the e-mails released).

Sony is full of it - they claimed they have been trying to release the film but those bad theater owners wouldn't. Maybe they only meant big theater chains but I KNEW there were independents out there that would do it.

What did Holden Caulfield say about all those phonies? There's the Sony executives.

You ever get the feeling that this was all a ploy from Sony to create buzz around a marginally-funny film that was poorly received during initial screenings?

I'll wait for Netflix to get it, probably some time around March?

I would give my local independent art theater some business this year, except they were driven out of business after 35 years by the nearby Regal multiplex which converted to indie art releases when Regal opened another even larger mulitplex (with IMAX) in town...the first Regal folded anyway, but not until they'd cut off distribution for the real indie.

@7 That's not how I see it.

I think Sony handled this pretty well, especially considering they were the only entity actually harmed in the attack. They gave the big chains the option to screen the movie and they couldn't run to the exits (located on either side of the screen) fast enough.

In my opinion the big theater chains are the most despicable actors in this show. If the $20 ticket prices which come with a bunch of commercials you have to sit through before the movie begins weren't enough this is a great reason to boycott these chains. If it ends up helping the smaller theaters? Well that's just gravy.

@7

"What did Holden Caulfield say about all those phonies?"

Excellent, I enjoyed 'Catcher in the Rye' as a teen but forget most of it. So westello, basically I have very little idea what he said about the phonies. Can you quote some parts of the book for me? Would be awesome, thanks!

Wow! It's almost as if Sony had planned this the whole time! Luckily, they *bravely* set up their distribution chain days ago, to guarantee that theaters could have it for their newly revealed opening day, the opening day that they've always had.

I hope someone really funny (not Rogen) is busy writing a biting satire about this whole debable. Um...let's see, it's American Hustle meets Burn After Reading meets... oh, I don't know, The Informant!?

(debacle, not debable.)

Sony had little choice. The hackers harvested over 100TB of data, wiping machines in the process. Many of the movies that Sony had ready to distribute were stolen and are available on bootleg networks. Bank information, like ACH info used to pay people like Clooney & Hanks, was also stolen. Sony reportedly had problems processing payroll. They had failed even basic standards for safeguarding sensitive information and face hundreds of millions of dollars in potential litigation for gross negligence. Current & former employees, vendors & contractors, and anyone Sony Pictures did business with is lining up to extract their pound of flesh.

Sony is trying to pull out of the death spiral they started when they green-lighted this very unnecessary film without the slightest bit of foresight.

@ 7, conspiracy theories close circular logic whhels nicely, don't they?