Ijeoma's three greatest fears: teenagers, the internet, and white people.

Comments

1
I, too, lock my car door when a 19 y/o cracker crosses the street in front of me.
2
In Vegas, you now get flyers for gun ranges handed to you on the strip. I'm not sure if that is the weaponizing of frat boys suggested in the article, but it was disturbing. The Bundy ranch may have spawned a gun tourism business.
3
Most white people aren't so bad once you get to know them. But of course that's true of everybody.
4
Thirteen-year-olds are the meanest people in the world. They terrify me to this day... because 8th graders will make fun of you but in an accurate way. They will get to the thing that you don't like about you. They don't even have to look at you for long. They'll just be like, 'Ha, ha, ha, ha, hey, look at that high waisted man. He got feminine hips.' And I'm like, 'No! That's the thing I'm sensitive about.'
- John Mulaney
5
Some of my best friends are white people. You should try talking to some, and maybe you will find that they are people too.
6
Add in male prostitutes playing aggressive touch football in the suburbs and yes, those are four frightful things.
7
>and white people

Jesus Christ, Ijeoma. Bait harder.
8
Yes , white people can be very scary - e g Dick Cheney.
9
my best friend is white. well, puerto rican, and thats close enough

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