CHUD is an acronym for Cannibalistic Humanoid Underground Dweller. The tagline for the 1984 film CHUD is "Ugly. Slobbering. Ferocious. Carnivorous." NUD is an acronym for New Urban Drinks. NUD is a 2007 Seattle bar/restaurant promo offering "1 drink + 2 small plates for $15" (in September only, at dinner only, Sun–Thurs only, etc.). NUD's tagline: All right, so NUD lacks a tagline. Let's make one up, shall we? "NUD: The latest in repurposed loss-leader Seattle restaurant promotions." That has a nice ring to it.

The cutoff for the N in NUD is three years old, which, what with a bar opening in Seattle every 17 minutes, is not all that new. Most of the participants have serious-business happy hours that rival or best the NUD deal. Whatever—why are you being such a killjoy? Let's go NUD-ing! Between Bar Exam's archive and The Stranger's ever-vigilant, ever-true reader reviewers (at www.thestranger.com), NUD's easily appraised.

No one's ever been to 0/8 Seafood Grill & Twisted Cork Wine Bar. It appears to be on the Eastside. Onward, to Barolo, a rococo-mod-by-way-of-Vegas fantasia in downtown Seattle where I had an unhappy dinner followed by a despondent happy hour last November. Perhaps it's improved; Stranger reader reviewers remain silent on the topic. BOKA (also downtown) is completely worth it, if only for the stunningly complicated décor. Reader reviewers deploy superlatives freely vis-à-vis BOKA's food/drink. And BOKA's an acronym, too: Bold Original Kitchen Artistry. Auspicious! Lark's lounge, Licorous, is a pretty and popular Capitol Hill spot, and if the small plates aren't all knockouts (reader reviewers concur: "Most are good, some are amazing, only a few have disappointed"), it's lovely to be there. Lola is one of Tom Douglas's downtown joints. T-Doug hasn't fucked anything up big-time since dinner at the premiere of Teatro ZinZanni; Lola's NUD is a solid bet. Marazul on Denny has one billion different rums and a shiny sugar-cane press and decent-if-confused-fusion snacks. Go for happy hour, which just got even cheaper, which may signal desperation—cue tumbleweeds from reader reviewers. I waxed rhapsodic about lower Queen Anne's Moxie when it opened (though not the name nor tagline: "Food with nerve"). Reader reviewers say, "OH YEAH!!!" "the real deal," "I love Moxie!" The quadripartite concept and L.A./aquarium décor of downtown's QUBE have kept me away; reader reviewers rave; a brand-new chef makes it an unknown quantity. Between the sushi options, I prefer the stylized Red Fin (downtown); reader reviewers like the teriyaki squid and heated toilet seats at Umi in Belltown. And everyone agrees about Veil on lower Queen Anne: ultrachic bar, uneven food, excellent cocktails, perfect for a NUD-ing. recommended

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bethany@thestranger.com