How excited were your parents when you got this job, and exactly how many vagina cakes do you send your father each year?

Oh, they were totally stoked. I've never sent my dad a cake; he lives in California. Although I guess I could, since we ship our goods. I send him lots of dirty cards from the store, though.

What's your favorite dessert to make?

I enjoy a good shit cake, but my favorite dessert to make is a personal creation. You take a brownie with fudge icing, apply a layer of coconut filling, and add a chocolate-chocolate cookie dipped into chocolate. Put that on top, followed by a layer of lemon filling, and a thin slice of marble cake. Freeze it. Frost it with butter-cream frosting, and add a splash of German chocolate cake on top. I call it the Cavity. That's what happens when you get bored at a bakery.

Most people play solitaire when they're bored at work.

I get productive. Usually I make a whole bunch of miniature parts—breasts, penises, special requests.

Do you have to be trained to make edible genitals, or is it a skill that comes naturally?

We're definitely trained, but I think I have a natural knack for it.

What kind of "special requests" are you subjected to?

We get special requests all the time for stuff I've never thought about, let alone thought about re-creating in marzipan, like an elephant humping a donkey. Every day is a new learning experience. The only time it sucks is when people have super-complicated requests—like an eight-person orgy—and they want it in an hour.

Do customers ever bring in photos and ask you to re-create, say, specific breasts in cookie form?

All the time. We can scan laser images directly to the top of your dessert, so requests like that are easy.