Food & Drink Sep 26, 2018 at 4:00 am

What it's like to race through Seattle by bicycle while downing burgers, fries, and milkshakes.

The author, left, scarfing down fries at one of four stops among the six Dick’s locations in the Seattle area. Courtesy of the Author

Comments

1

This is a brilliant idea. Well done!

2

Fuck the Spadys.

4

This is awesome, congrats.

5

You can get a great burger, excellent fries and cheap beer without the political baggage at Loretta's Northwesterner in South Park.

6

Amazing. Thank you.

7

What was the winning time?

8

Let me know when this happens next year!

9

Dicks.. You get it or you dont.. I think its a great Idea. The Spadys BTW have one of the best company policies, better than most larger corps here.. The kids who start work there are discouraged from making Dicks their life's work. get in, get trained, be a good worker and get a good chunk of money for college from Dicks..Safeway aint doing that at.

10

Well, you lost, but it sounds like you were the only ones that went to the Dick's immortalized in song. Dick's is the place were the cool hang out (https://genius.com/Sir-mix-a-lot-posse-on-broadway-lyrics).

Anyway, that is a fun contest. Good reminder that it isn't distance, but the killer hills and stoplights that slow you down.

11

@5- oh just STFU.

12

Did Tour de Dick's in 2003 with a group of about 5 guys. And we indeed called it "Tour de Dick's." All 6 locations, and had to eat at least a special at each one. Going up and over Queen Anne after 4 stops, 4 burgers and a couple shakes was a little rough. Step up peloton!

13

The accompanying photo was a Tour de Dicks all on it's own.

14

@2 "Fuck the Spadys."

Oh, you mean the family whose successful business employs many people at an excellent wage? The same business where insurance is offered? The business where one is encouraged to advance and move up in live? That one? Or is this latent anger over the blowback from "head tax"? The tax that had no budget and no allocation target for the money, just a gimme gimme gimme to feed more money into the Homeless Industrial Complex of SHARE/WHEEL and LIHI. The same tax that would have hurt many businesses? The same tax that was calculated on gross vs. net revenue (there is a difference - look it up). That one?

Yep - I see where you are coming from now.

15

Tour de Dick's was always my favorite gay club.

16

Sometimes, I like to imagine how we humans would be viewed by a more sentient animal not unlike ourselves: what emotions would our species evoke in them in the way a mosquito or deer evokes an emotion in us?

I picture them watching us, racing from spot to spot, taking pictures of ourselves as we stuff our face with tubers turned carcinogenic after being fried at high temperatures.

At first, I thought they would view us the way we view maggots: with a certain squirmy disgust; but then I decided it would be akin to the way we view hyenas. Same behavior, but also loud and somewhat dangerous.


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