I propose Catalina and Phoebe!

Will the news reporter have to fuck all the city council candidates or just the ones who claim they're lesbians?

Asking for a friend.

I would like to throw my hat into the ring. As a straight, white male of a rather advanced age and centrist political leanings I feel that I would lend a certain balance and diversity to the Stranger staff (and I know how much diversity is appreciated by TS). Just let me know, I’ll be waiting…

As an aside, I promise not to fuck any council candidates (at least not before the election is over).

okay
Fine hire
whomever you
Must but my query
takes a different Approach:

how Much might
you pay Me to
Not comment

send me a Check*
for $10,000 be-
Fore I change
my Mind.

(toss
out wormmy
[& make it a measly
five thousand dollars]
Before I change my mind).

@5, Start a go fund me... I'd contribute $1 to have you go away!

@6

Excellent!
the Longest
Journey oft Begins

Gawd
what a Great
fucking Country!

with but a Single
Go-Fund-ME
Dollar bill.