Don't sweat it - those are the kind of putzes that get their asses kicked sooner than later.

I worked service industry jobs for years and learned that some people are determined to be unhappy no matter what you do. So you serve those folks briskly but professionally and focus your energy on the people who are a pleasure to serve.

In the parlance of our time: don't let the haters drag you down.

Get passive / aggressive right back: Impart bodily fluids in all your “customers” food and drink, they are ALL shitheads. And a little fecal matter never hurt anyone’s immune system.

I've definitely been out with my girlfriend, written something like that on a napkin, and given it to her pretending it was a love note, which was pretty fucking hilarious. Possible the note wasn't for you.

@4 - Get some professional help, your advice is illegal, immoral, unethical, and dangerously unhealthy, not to mention just plain nasty and sick. Don't pretend you're being sarcastic, that's not how sarcasm works.

Perhaps they thought you were cute and it was invitation, not an insult?

@4: That, and what you suggest is not passive-aggressive, but ACTIVE-AGGRESSIVE, or just plain "aggressive" for short.

@6 - Are you trying to “kink-shame” me? Your comment offensive, and non-inclusive of a legitimate lifestyle that is biologically mine. How do you feel about rape culture? Are you an active participant in denying the existence of those you object to?

@10
Cheers mate. I was in the market for a new spellcaster, and now I don't have to go looking.
Dr Edward seems like he could be a great dude.

And yet he can't seem to cast "Spell check!"
Go figure.

What -would- the incantation be for that?
"Orthographae rectum!"
... maybe not.

My instinct, based on the very limited facts in this story, is that the napkin note wasn't aimed at you.

@12 - Who said anything about funny? People like YOU trying to oppress those you disagree with is never funny.

@10 what in the 100 fucks are you smoking? 2nd question, can I have some?

It’s Thanksgiving evening, and here I sit in my underwear commenting in the Stranger forums... But here’s the bottom line: I,A should take the position that the opinions of Douche Bags such as he is talking about are of no qonsiqunce and should not take up any of his concern.

@19: If something is posted on The Stranger "I.,A.", and the Mercury "I.,A.", it's because the sister papers themselves made the decision to do so, not the I/A poster themselves.

@19 and @20 yeah I've noticed that the letters appear Blogtown PDX first and then are recycled in SLOG. Makes it seem less likely (to me) that these are actual IA submissions and somebody is writing them because no one actually submits them. Who knows.

Passive aggression is the plague of the Pacific Northwest. If the letter writer really is new here, they're going to have to get used to it and learn how to navigate it because it is more prolific in the PNW than moss on trees.

22 - BS. Passive aggression is a structural component of WASP uhmuhrika. You are picking the fat out of lard.

@23 Well, I grew up in New York (with some time in Boston) and didn't experience passive aggression until I moved to Seattle and it was THE most difficult cultural difference I had to deal with and I still don't deal with it well. When I got sick and had to leave Seattle and return to the east coast, I suddenly had to remember how normal people handled their emotions. 8 years later, my mom (primary caregiver) retired and we moved to the northern Oregon coast (3 years ago) and I get my health care in Porltand at OHSU and FUCK the passive aggression again. Guess I was just around a certain type of people on the east coast (for 30 years) that did not suffer from the malady. Too poor to be a WASP. I am white, but I am also an atheist.

Oh, shit! Rabid trolling Gluteus Maximus Arty Zefferelli's back from the dead!
Zombie alert.....

Yeah, once revenge involves bodily fluids, I'm out.
Spitting in someones food (or in their face) says a lot more about the spitter than the spittee.
About as cowardly as leaving a note, and slightly less classy.

RE: blackface... I just saw Bing Crosby in blackface in a movie called "Holiday Inn." Which, BTW, was the first appearance of the song, "White Christmas." Don't you love irony?

haha you just out passive aggressive'd them! way to out-seattle them. they suck, and apparently you suck too! cool! count this among the reasons i would love to leave my stupid town, still some more money to be maid and an easy life to live if you don't commute. but jesus, what a bunch of wet blankets i have to live around.

I was also thinking there's a possibility it wasn't meant for the waiter. Maybe one person asked the other, "So what do you want to do now?" And the answer is on the napkin.

@The even weirder segue to that was that, in the color remake to HOLIDAY INN-the 1954 WHITE CHRISTMAS-they knew they couldn't get away with actually staging a minstrel number anymore, but they had the main characters sing a song mourning the loss of minstrel shows as a cultural tradition. Who would even have insisted on doing that at that stage? By the mid-50s, even white Southerners found minstrelsy embarrassing.

I'm not sure blowing glitter in someone's face will make them happier. I once got some glitter in my eye and it was a shitty experience.

That is SO fucking Seattle. Passive aggressive and high maintenance. :-)

The widow of a friend of mine is a complete and total psycopath, especially at restaurants. She'll be really sweet when the server first comes to the table and then turn on a dime and loudly berate him for the stupidest things, and then leave no tip (She is an attorney, who got a huge settlement from her husband's law firm, so it's not like she's hurting for funds. I won't dine with her because of how nuts she is, and because I think she drove my friend to suicide, but that's another matter). I'd rather wait on a hundred passive-aggresive customers than wait on her.

portland scribe dear, the song "White Christmas" , written by Irving Berlin, first appeared in the film "Holiday Inn" in 1942. The film "White Christmas" is a mess on many, many levels - not just the racism, but also the military fetish. It's just a yucky experience all around.

@5 That was my immediate thought as well.

Even though @10 was deleted before I saw it, I'm guessing @11's comment is really solid.

-#33- the film may be a shit-slog but the song has at least one version that redeems it-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bQ6LIS6m8qE

@35 It was an ad for a 'spellcaster'. I don't know about you, but I've wanted the services of a spellcaster for a long time-employment, relationships, my johnson; you name it, there's probably a spell for anything and everything. But the mods took it down. I thought this was America!

The bartender committed a macro-aggression by not properly understanding their initial order. Patriarchal white-supremacists at it again.

You need to find better work and stop being a little bitch.