Your Sobriety Is Exhausting

Comments

1

Sounds like the sober friend just needs to expand his friend circle a bit to include more than just former drinking buddies.

3

I dare Anon to refer to it as "Cali" in the presence of an actual Californian.

4

Yeah, newly-sober people are the worst: (see #2 above there for a great example). They need to constantly convince themselves that they're really happy this way (so tons of blabbering about it) and also that it would be awful, AWFUL to go back to drinking (so tons of shitting on everyone that still drinks). Also, like LW said, "Dry drunks" tend to be assholes that used to keep their assholery pent up until they could let it loose with a few drinks, and now are just letting the assholery fester and spew out on everyone and everything.

Still, LW, you can stop hanging out with this guy, you know. Or just shut him down with a few "I know you're happy being sober, but I'd like to talk about something else for once," statements when he gets going.

5

I only came here to say that's an excellent illustration. Cute and hideous at the same time. Good job.

6

Only 5% of alcoholics stay sober in the long run, which means 95% are going to fall back into alcohol addiction. If talking about not drinking is what he needs to stay sober, give the guy some grace and just listen. He's on the edge and your listening might be the only thing keeping him out of the bottle.

8

@6 wildly inaccurate. Those are the stats for long term weight loss.

9

Must I have to listen to shit like this?

10

Sorry you feel so put upon by a friend trying to move past their addictions that your had to air your grievances anonymously in public instead of talking directly to them about your relationship. I can only assume that you feeling so put out by this stems from your deep insecurities about your own pattern of consumption, so, truly, I pity you.

PSA for considerate readers out there: If you're at a social event and notice an acquaintance went for a soda instead of a pint, please don't call it out and ask why they're not drinking. It's none of your business and it very much singles them out in a way that can be stressful for someone trying to delicately balance fitting in with their own personal wellbeing.

11

Adding on to what @10 said, hey holiday party hosts:

Take an extra 10 min and about $10 to make a non-alcoholic punch for your parties. Also alcohol drinkers enjoy an non-alcoholic respite to get rehydrated. I'm so tired of seeing beautiful holiday spreads, fine wines, but being instructed to dig out a sparking water from the downstairs fridge.

12

You guys think it would be helpful to tell someone who struggles with addiction that their new, less self-destructive addiction is annoying? This person wants to support their friend through a challenging time even though it means listening to them carry on about bikes and not drinking, and this is how it’s done.

Sorry, sober people - this is how your non-sober friends feel when you first enter sobriety, but that doesn’t mean they don’t like or care about you. They put up with it because they want to support you in your pursuit of a healthier lifestyle, and then vent to others when they can. This is how most people cope with their petty grievances in life.

13

"while shit-talking the rest of your non-sober social circle."

Your friend is Erica C Barnett?

14

Staying sober is just one of those "whatever it takes" kinda things. What you're seeing is exactly why their obsessive personality and booze/drugs just didn't mix. Do your best to be supportive, but it's natural to grow apart—annoying is annoying however you cut it—if you can't keep your cool around them it's ok to let the friendship trail off.

And to add to @10s PSA, a great response a sober friend of mine has when, usually younger folks, ask "why aren't you drinking?" is "you'll see."

15

is partying "Seattle-hard" harder than moved-from-Cali-in-the-aughts hard?

16

Had to turn off at 'Cali' ...yikes!

17

@15 I took that to mean heroin.
@16 It's truly horrible. Ima come up there and start saying "Washi."